Carman Fox

Getting rid of crows.

rexxx

New member
Apr 15, 2009
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Great idea...why don't we cut all the F/N trees down..... that will work....:doh::doh::doh:
Kind of a drama queen aren't you? I said cut 1 tree down. You can plant 2 more in your pants to make up for it
 

Wakeup

Active member
Jan 15, 2014
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I lived on 21st years ago and the crows would come up from false creek at daybreak. Pellet gun was very effective ,sting em once or twice and gone for 2-3 years.
 

Miss*Bijou

Sexy Troublemaker
Nov 9, 2006
3,131
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Montréal
Hi,
I was wondering if anyone had any advice for getting rid of a crow that has made a nest in a big elm tree in my front yard. it is very noisy and keeps the song birds away. I need some suggestions on how to go about this in an urban setting. I specify urban because the easy way, if was not within city limits, would be to shoot it and then leave its body on the roof or in the tree. Crows are smart and other crows would then stay away from the danger. Unfortunately the City of Winnipeg and the Police take a dim view of one discharging firearms or air rifles within the city limits.
Add to that my 16 year old daughter making me promise I won't hurt the crow.
My next plan is to get out the garden hose and continually hose it down but it is so high up (~40-50 feet) I may not be able to reach t with a garden hose.
I'm also thinking of hiring an arborist with tree climbing experience to go up and destroy it but I'm concerned it would just come back.

Cheers

Seriously? All this for a crows' nest? People, come on!

The fake owl thing def does not work as was demonstrated very clearly to me this afternoon when hearing a crow (I love crows, unlike the grouches here), I looked up to spot it sitting on the roof of a house among 5 or 6 fake owls. I had to laugh because it was the only house with the ugly fake owls yet that's right where the crow chose to perch. In yo' face, sucka!

Crow: 1
Silly Human: 0

(judging by the fact that the roof was covered in owls, I'd be willing to bet the crow's score was way higher than 1. Ha!)


As for raccoons, I wouldn't bet on that so quickly. I've seen crows seriously dive bombing and threatening a raccoon that was on the roof, not even very close to or an immediate threat to the crows nest. The raccoon looked a tad intimidated. lol


What exactly is getting rid of the nest supposed to accomplish? Do you think the crows are going to get the eviction notice and move out of the neighbourhood because you say so? Or are they just going to be royally pissed at you (and they will remember you) and build a new nest in your neighbour's tree, where you can continue to enjoy the lovely noise in the morning?


Short of shooting them (which I'll address later), those crows live in your neighbourhood and not likely to pack up and move away anytime soon. It's probably in both yours and the birds best interest to find a compromise and a solution that promotes co-existence. Finding a way to enjoy their presence (if not their early morning turf wars) is your best bet. Don't mess with crows, they'll make your life miserable. Lol


Here's an idea for respectful co-existence:


° Leave the crows' nest alone!


° Don't bother with stupid fake owls - the crows will just laugh at you.


° Get a decent bird feeder (get a squirrel proof one because I can just imagine how irate you'll be when the squirrels start raiding your feeder).


° This will attract the (non corvid) birds - the reason they're not in your yard isnt necessarily because of crows. It might be because they're at the house a few doors down from you, the one with people who provide them with a constant supply of quality seeds.. and maybe even a bird bath and fresh drinking water.

They may also have better trees, a bird friendly yard/garden and no outdoor cat but I don't know what your situation is like.

Make your yard more bird-friendly:
http://youtu.be/iaAFt_bmmwU


° Get a bag of non salted peanuts (unshelled) which you can then leave out (just a few) for them each day.


° They will love it -and you- and (in Vancouver anyway) it will attract Stellar's Jay's (yes the ones that are blue in color, with the spiky feathers on the top of their heads) and occasionally squirrels, who will be somewhat rewarded for staying out of the bird feeder.


° Feel free to supplement with any meat, bread, crackers or just about anything except fruits or veggies that has gone stale and you would otherwise throw away. The crows will be so happy! They will recognize you, hang out close by when they see you. You will even be surprised to find yourself blocks away on a walk or going to a gas station and look up to find them right above your head and following you home. They might play tricks on you (they have a sense of humour) and be brats, too.

(They freaking LOVE dog kibble or dog treats. LOVE.)


° Consider adding a homemade or store bought bird bath for all to drink and bathe (not the squirrels, at least I've never seen them make use of it).


° Replace the water regularly (don't use soap or dish detergent if you decide to wash it - it's toxic for birds btw!)


° Get good ear plugs for the morning squabbles and accept that it is just a small inconvenience for having all this wildlife right in your backyard!


° Develop an appreciation and respect for crows and drop the foolish belief that they deserve to be labelled as pests (honestly, humans deserve that label a hell of a lot more than any crow!) and that, whether or not they are protected, they have less of a right than you do to live where they choose to. That's not true and they have as much right to live there as you do.


° And finally, this goes for all of you, even if you don't have a crow 'problem', do yourselves (and corvids) a big favour and read (or listen to an audiobook) the following book. It's fascinating.

Gifts of the Crow: How Perception, Emotion, and Thought Allow Smart Birds to Behave Like Humans
by John Marzluff & Tony Angell



Also:

In the company of crows and ravens
by John Marzluff & Tony Angell

Bird Brains: The Intelligence of Crows, Ravens, Magpies, and Jay's
by Candace Savage

Mind of the Raven: Investigations and Adventures with Wolf-birds
by Bernd Heinrich




And watch:


A murder of crows:

http://www.cbc.ca/player/Shows/Shows/The+Nature+of+Things/2009-10/ID/2543461833/


Bird brains:






And some interesting sites about crows and corvids:


http://sefs.washington.edu/research.acl/

http://coyot.es/thecorvidblog/author/thecorvidblog/

http://sci-ence.org/clever-corvus/






Disturbing the nest (please listen to your daughter!) is a truly despicable act and those of you who suggested shooting the bird deserve to be shot in both butt cheeks yourselves. Harsh? Not any harsher than your barbaric 'suggestion'.


Finally, the suggestion to cut down the tree: I will definitely second LO-KI's reply to that brilliant (not!) idea. Not only is the suggestion ridiculous (next time you get a mosquito bite on your leg, you should just amputate it, ok? Don't be such a drama Queen. You can just get a prosthetic leg, what's the big deal?!) but you can't cut down a tree just because you decide to.


I'm pretty sure you need a permit from the municipality and you need a good reason (like it's dead/dying/diseased). "Because crows have built their nest in it and it's loud in the morning" is probably not going to be seen as a good enough reason. ;)
 
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Miss*Bijou

Sexy Troublemaker
Nov 9, 2006
3,131
44
48
Montréal
Haha Just found this advice on the site of someone who does research about crows. Sounds a lot like my suggestion!


How can I get rid of crows from my yard?*


First off, I urge you to reconsider.* Yes they can be noisy, and get into things, and cause mischief.* But I assure you, you will not find another urban animal so charismatic, so intelligent and so accessible to explore avian behavior, cognition and biology.* However, if you’re dead-set on the idea…you’re still mostly out of luck.* You can hang a dead crow from a tree but that’s about it.* Remember: poisons and ammo will hurt not only the crows you’re targeting but also the other wildlife you may be trying to attract.* My advice is to open yourself to the idea of actually liking crows and get to the know the family, because it is a distinct family, that will*stay with you for years if you allow.


https://corvidresearch.wordpress.com/faqs-about-crows/#crow-gone





There's so much more to crows (and lots of other animals that live in our neighbourhoods!).


Work by Dr. John Marzluff and his collaborators in Seattle demonstrates that wild American crows can and do recognize human faces, acting on their memories of prior interactions with these people. Furthermore, their work shows that individual crows act on information they receive about these people even if in the absence of direct experience; in other words, they act based on what other crows have communicated to them about these particular people.*

The implications of these results, while consistent with my and a great many others’ experience, are unsettling to our culturally ingrained anthropocentric views of the world. What does it mean if the wild creatures around us know us as individuals and respond to our behavior, telling each other whether we are generous (offering food) or dangerous (likely to trap or shoot)? Certainly it upends the idea that we are more sophisticated in our knowledge of them than they are of us. The only way I can recognize a crow is if that bird is banded or perhaps has white feathers or an injury; the crows seem to have no problem recognizing me without my wearing any sort of tags.

The work of Marzluff and colleagues looks specifically at the relationship between humans and crows in urban areas. As the type of ecosystem most profoundly impacted by anthropic forces, urban areas can provide us with a clear sense of how human behavior affects the behavior of other species. Human behavior within these ecosystems is a force of natural selection; individuals better able to perceive and predict human behavior are more likely to survive, thrive, and reproduce than individuals less ability to interpret human behavior.*Therefore, over time, urban areas might be expected to be host to ever increasing numbers of other animals all able to know us, and predict what we will do next.

It is only recently that scientists have started studying the ecology of the city, despite the urban environment’s likely unique impacts on biodiversity. Our ignorance of the way the city functions as an ecological and evolutionary system fosters our lack of awareness of the complex and dynamic responses of other species to our presence. Crows are an urban opportunist and do well in areas affected by people. While this might at first seem a reason to focus our attention towards species that are threatened or endangered, understanding how they respond to the behavior of humans can provide us a sense of the ways human activities potentially affect the behavior of other corvids, other birds, and other urban animal species in general. Also, insight into the world of the birds that live right next door to us serves to deeply enrichen our own experience of the city.

In their work to document facial recognition and behavioral response in crows, the Marzluff lab focused on exploring the relationship between trapping a crow and being recognized (and mobbed) later by that crow. To do this, researchers wore caveman masks while trapping, banding and releasing crows on the UW campus. Later, other students put on the masks and walked the campus, taking notes on crow behavior. A control mask, Dick Cheney, was also worn by people walking around the campus. Banded and unbanded crows responded by scolding anyone wearing the caveman mask while, at the same time, ignoring the Dick Cheney mask. Future masks were created to be more lifelike, based on actual individual people rather than caricatures, and the results were the same. Crows recognize human faces. They even recognize them when the mask is upside down.

Over several years of data collection, it became clear that information about dangerous humans was passing both horizontally among adult crows and vertically between adults and their fledgling young. Unbanded adults who had never been trapped scolded mask-wearing individuals. Fledglings watched their parents scold and later scolded those faces they now recognized as a threat themselves. This community-wide recognition lasts. Crows were still responding aggressively to the dangerous masks more than two and a half years after the original birds were captured.*

While crows in different regions of Washington showed the ability to recognize people, the level of response they exhibit appears to depend on whether humans are more or less generally threatening.* Crows in urban Seattle, where they are generally tolerated, show a greater level of aggressiveness toward people wearing threatening masks, than do crows in a relatively rural Washington site bordered by areas where crows are regularly hunted.

For all of these birds, it is likely that a very specific neurosensory pathway directs their perception of these faces. Marzluff and Colleagues at UW School of Medicine used positron emission tomography scans (PET scans) to determine the brain activity of crows exposed to threatening and caring masks.* They discovered that in crows the response to the vision of a threatening face is translated through a very specific neurosensory pathway; this pathway is different than that activated by a caring face (the mask worn by those who fed the crows while they were in captivity for the study).

While the research on recognition and aversion is now extensive, there has been less research into the relationship between caring behavior and crow recognition and cultural communication. However, there are a number of anecdotes of crows recognizing people with whom they have positive interactions, not least of which are the gifts that people, such as Gabi Mann, receive from these birds. Marzluff, in the book he co-wrote with the artist Tony Angell,*Gifts of the Crow, documents these episodes of apparent gifting behavior, from the delivery of a candy heart to a necklace bead to a key.*

In examining the incidents of gifting, Marzluff and Angel conclude that “gifting is real.”* They also note the two hypothesis that might explain this behavior; one is that it is accidental. A crow may be carrying an object and drop it in order to pick of up a higher value food item. Alternatively, gifting is intentional. Crows give gifts to people for the same reasons people give gifts to each other, as a form of connection and reciprocity. This is the hypothesis that drives the internet excitement over Gabi Mann’s gifts. It is an awesome thing to imagine that the crows are acting to connect with us. However, the implication of this level of recognition and intentional interaction between wild birds and humans is also profound.

This work with crows is extensive and progresses hand in hand with the study of corvid cognition. To some extent, the ability of various corvid species to recognize humans is less surprising since we know that corvids are complex social beings with, at least in some species, the ability to create and use tools. They are, however, not the only wild avian species to recognize human faces. Wild Northern mockingbirds recognize potentially threatening people. Pigeons recognize the faces of people who feed them and know, based on past experience, whether that human is more or less likely to bother them while they are eating. It seems the crows who know us are just the tip of the iceberg in the urban ecosystem; our perception of existing in our isolated human biome, assuming only our pets know us, is one likely to crumble as we learn more about how the species we engage with every day know us and change their behavior to respond to us.

http://voicesforbiodiversity.org/articles/the-crow-that-knows-us
 

mil

Banned
Feb 9, 2015
115
0
0
find a dead crow somewhere and hang it as close to the nest as possible and harrase the shit outta them ...theyw ill feel unsafe and leave.
dont let them lay eggs and have babies.... we all know how annoying the cry of baby crows is for 5 months.
find a spot where u can get a shot with a webly pellet gun that is inside a room and shoot out a window.... everytime they land in tree , blast them !!!
you must be ever pressistant. you will win ! :)
 

Miss*Bijou

Sexy Troublemaker
Nov 9, 2006
3,131
44
48
Montréal
find a dead crow somewhere and hang it as close to the nest as possible and harrase the shit outta them ...theyw ill feel unsafe and leave.
dont let them lay eggs and have babies.... we all know how annoying the cry of baby crows is for 5 months.
find a spot where u can get a shot with a webly pellet gun that is inside a room and shoot out a window.... everytime they land in tree , blast them !!!
you must be ever pressistant. you will win ! :)

Bit of a douchebag, aren't we? Someone forgot to tell you it's 2015, not 1915? It's your kind of mix between arrogant, ignorant and power hungry attitude that's responsible for the fucking mess this planet's in and the serious shit the generations that come after you are going to be kicked in the ass with.




What an ugly, pathetic display of human hubris. I don't know how people can seriously believe in humans' superiority when people like you provide the proof that it's the opposite. Nothing superior in that kind of vile bs.

That crow is 10 times the person you are. Sick fuck.


You guys go ahead and get mad at me for my attitude or language all you want. But im not the one getting a huge hardon from killing and tormenting birds that are barely the size of my head and aren't doing anything to me ffs. So want to get mad at me? Check your priorities!

What a tough guy with his pellet gun.. .

Like I said: shot in both butt cheeks.
 

mil

Banned
Feb 9, 2015
115
0
0
Bit of a douchebag, aren't we? Someone forgot to tell you it's 2015, not 1915? It's your kind of mix between arrogant, ignorant and power hungry attitude that's responsible for the fucking mess this planet's in and the serious shit the generations that come after you are going to be kicked in the ass with.




What an ugly, pathetic display of human hubris. I don't know how people can seriously believe in humans' superiority when people like you provide the proof that it's the opposite. Nothing superior in that kind of vile bs.

That crow is 10 times the person you are. Sick fuck.


You guys go ahead and get mad at me for my attitude or language all you want. But im not the one getting a huge hardon from killing and tormenting birds that are barely the size of my head and aren't doing anything to me ffs. So want to get mad at me? Check your priorities!

What a tough guy with his pellet gun.. .

Like I said: shot in both butt cheeks.
wow , your a true Troll..... where are the mods?
 

grusse

Well-known member
Feb 18, 2010
3,873
2,090
113
I was wondering if mil was posting tongue-in-cheek to stir things up?if so, I'd say he succeeded.

I also wondered where would you look for a dead crow?

I can relate to their intelligence from my experiences with magpies,part of the crow family.

I lived in Sydney,Aus for a few yrs late 90's.4 of us rented a house in North Sydney.The landlord had told us of magpies in the back yard
that were "raucous,but fun."

Very true statement.the 1st morning I was having a coffee on the back patio,2 magpies flew down,landed just beyond arm's length, and started
"talking" to me...bold as Billy-be-damned!it seemed like they were saying I was on their turf&they wanted something,lol.

I got them a bowl with blueberries&they got stuck into it.

that evening,or the next, we used the backyard bbq& the 2 magpies showed up, more talk,maybe "medium rare for me" I dunno,but we
quickly learned they were NOT vegetarian.

I can't say about other countries but magpies in Oz are extremely protective of their nests.I actually saw a 20ish girl get chased and pecked on the head by
a over-protective nesting mother magpie.
Every yr ppl get treated for scalp wounds like this..maybe Alfred H. got his inspiration for The Birds here?

It's true that they recognize ppl.They knew us and didn't bother us,except to come around scrounging food,which wasn't a bother,it was fun.
But anybody approaching our back door entrance would get swooped,nesting season or not.

I got quite attached to the cheeky buggers.
 

plumbcrawl

Active member
Aug 12, 2007
429
94
28
Figure out a way to get bleach into the nest (a kids super soaker or a hose attachment for lawn chemicals) It will solve your problem with one or 2 treatments
 

mikehawksbig

Member
Jun 2, 2010
123
0
16
I think a fake owl keeps them at bay too
Crows actually hate owls to the point where crows will congregate to attack them, so that approach might backfire. Fake owl works for pigeons and seagulls though.

Scarecrow with a crazy hat. That's what you need.
 

grusse

Well-known member
Feb 18, 2010
3,873
2,090
113
. Fake owl works for pigeons


not always.I bought a fake owl to try to discourage pigeons from perching on my balcony.woke up one morning,looked out the window,a pigeon was talking to his new friend
the owl,wondering why there was no response,lol.
 

mil

Banned
Feb 9, 2015
115
0
0
I was wondering if mil was posting tongue-in-cheek to stir things up?if so, I'd say he succeeded.

I also wondered where would you look for a dead crow?

I can relate to their intelligence from my experiences with magpies,part of the crow family.

I lived in Sydney,Aus for a few yrs late 90's.4 of us rented a house in North Sydney.The landlord had told us of magpies in the back yard
that were "raucous,but fun."

Very true statement.the 1st morning I was having a coffee on the back patio,2 magpies flew down,landed just beyond arm's length, and started
"talking" to me...bold as Billy-be-damned!it seemed like they were saying I was on their turf&they wanted something,lol.

I got them a bowl with blueberries&they got stuck into it.

that evening,or the next, we used the backyard bbq& the 2 magpies showed up, more talk,maybe "medium rare for me" I dunno,but we
quickly learned they were NOT vegetarian.

I can't say about other countries but magpies in Oz are extremely protective of their nests.I actually saw a 20ish girl get chased and pecked on the head by
a over-protective nesting mother magpie.
Every yr ppl get treated for scalp wounds like this..maybe Alfred H. got his inspiration for The Birds here?

It's true that they recognize ppl.They knew us and didn't bother us,except to come around scrounging food,which wasn't a bother,it was fun.
But anybody approaching our back door entrance would get swooped,nesting season or not.

I got quite attached to the cheeky buggers.
i never pass by a dead crow on the side of the road...i have picked up a couple in past few years.
last one , i hung by a wing and it was perfectly spread eagled , errr spread crowd. never saw a crow in my hood all spring and summer.
somehow they knew to avoid our place and told the rest of the MURDER. I believe that is the name of a bunch of crows.
Now i need another dead crow as i moved and i got a few brave guys caseing my joint!
i think just put miss bijoux out on patio raving and it would do the trick also !
 

mil

Banned
Feb 9, 2015
115
0
0
I was wondering if mil was posting tongue-in-cheek to stir things up?if so, I'd say he succeeded.

I also wondered where would you look for a dead crow?

I can relate to their intelligence from my experiences with magpies,part of the crow family.

I lived in Sydney,Aus for a few yrs late 90's.4 of us rented a house in North Sydney.The landlord had told us of magpies in the back yard
that were "raucous,but fun."

Very true statement.the 1st morning I was having a coffee on the back patio,2 magpies flew down,landed just beyond arm's length, and started
"talking" to me...bold as Billy-be-damned!it seemed like they were saying I was on their turf&they wanted something,lol.

I got them a bowl with blueberries&they got stuck into it.

that evening,or the next, we used the backyard bbq& the 2 magpies showed up, more talk,maybe "medium rare for me" I dunno,but we
quickly learned they were NOT vegetarian.

I can't say about other countries but magpies in Oz are extremely protective of their nests.I actually saw a 20ish girl get chased and pecked on the head by
a over-protective nesting mother magpie.
Every yr ppl get treated for scalp wounds like this..maybe Alfred H. got his inspiration for The Birds here?

It's true that they recognize ppl.They knew us and didn't bother us,except to come around scrounging food,which wasn't a bother,it was fun.
But anybody approaching our back door entrance would get swooped,nesting season or not.

I got quite attached to the cheeky buggers.

i never pass by a good dead crow on the side of the road...i have picked up a couple in past few years.
last one , i hung by a wing and it was perfectly spread eagled , errr spread crowd. never saw a crow in my hood all spring and summer.
somehow they knew to avoid our place and told the rest of the MURDER. I believe that is the name of a bunch of crows.
Now i need another dead crow as i moved and i got a few brave guys caseing my joint!
i think just put mis bijoux out on patio raving and it would do the trick also !
 

Miss*Bijou

Sexy Troublemaker
Nov 9, 2006
3,131
44
48
Montréal
.
.
.
"Almost all young children have a natural affinity for other animals, an attitude which seems to be endemic in young creatures of whatever species. I was no exception. As a child I fearlessly and happily consorted with frogs, snakes, chickens, squirrels and whatever else came my way.

“When I was a boy growing up on the Saskatchewan prairies, that feeling of affinity persisted—but it became perverted. Under my father’s tutelage I was taught to be a hunter; taught that “communion with nature” could be achieved over the barrel of a gun; taught that killing wild animals for sport establishes a mystic bond, “an ancient pact” between them and us.

“I learned first how to handle a BB gun, then a .22 rifle and finally a shotgun. With these I killed “vermin”—sparrows, gophers, crows and hawks. Having served that bloody apprenticeship, I began killing “game”—prairie chicken, ruffed grouse, and ducks. By the time I was fourteen, I had been fully indoctrinated with the sportsman’s view of wildlife as objects to be exploited for pleasure.

“Then I experienced a revelation.

“On a November day in 1935, my father and I were crouched in a muddy pit at the edge of a prairie slough, waiting for daybreak.

“The dawn, when it came at last, was grey and sombre. The sky lightened so imperceptibly that we could hardly detect the coming of the morning. We strained out eyes into swirling snow squalls. We flexed numb fingers in our shooting gloves.

“And then the dawn was pierced by the sonorous cries of seemingly endless flocks of geese that cam drifting, wraithlike, overhead. They were flying low that day. Snow Geese, startling white of breast, with jet-black wingtips, beat past while flocks of piebald wavies kept station at their flanks. An immense V of Canadas came close behind. As the rush of air through their great pinions sounded in our ears, we jumped up and fired. The sound of the shots seemed puny, and was lost at once in the immensity of wind and wings.

“One goose fell, appearing gigantic in the tenuous light as it spiralled sharply down. It struck the water a hundred yards from shore and I saw that it had only been winged. It swam off into the growing storm, its neck outstreched, calling…calling…calling after the fast-disappearing flock.

“Driving home to Saskatoon that night I felt a sick repugnance for what we had done, but what was of far greater import, I was experiencing a poignant but indefinable sense of loss. I felt, although I could not then have expressed it in words, as if I had glimpsed another and quite magical world—a world of oneness—and had been denied entry into it through my own stupidity.

“I never hunted for sport again.”

- Farley Mowat




One of Farley Mowat’s many classic books, A Whale for the Killing, written in1972, was an autobiographical account of his moving to Newfoundland because of his love for the land and the sea, only to find himself at odds with herring fishermen who made sport of shooting at an 80-ton fin whale trapped in a lagoon by the tide. Although he had started off thinking folks around there were a quaint and pleasant lot, he grew increasingly bitter over the attitudes of so many of the locals who, in turn, resented him for “interfering” by trying to save the stranded leviathan.

Mr. Mowat writes, “My journal notes reflect my sense of bewilderment and loss. ‘…they’re essentially good people. I know that, but what sickens me is their simple failure to resist the impulse of savagery…they seem to be just as capable of being utterly loathsome as the bastards from the cities with their high-powered rifles and telescopic sights and their mindless compulsion to slaughter everything alive, from squirrels to elephants…I admired them so much because I saw them as a natural people, living in at least some degree of harmony with the natural world. Now they seem nauseatingly anxious to renounce all that and throw themselves into the stinking quagmire of our society which has perverted everything natural within itself, and is now busy destroying everything natural outside itself. How can they be so bloody stupid? How could*I*have been so bloody stupid?’”

Farley Mowat ends the chapter with another line I can well relate to: “I had withdrawn my compassion from them…now I bestowed it all upon the whale.”


Have no idea what lovely replies I got.. Might read them later but just wanted to add this for now.

I have bestowed all my compassion on the crows (and other animals) and some of you should at least bestow some of your compassion on them, if you're at all capable of it.
 
Ashley Madison
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