A guy is browsing in a pet shop and sees a parrot sitting on a little perch.
>> It doesn't have any feet or legs. The guy says aloud, "Jeesh, I wonder
>> what happened to this parrot?"
>>
>> The parrot says, "I was born this way. I'm a defective parrot."
>>
>> "Holy crap," the guy replies. "You actually understood and answered me!"
>>
>> "I got every word," says the parrot. "I happen to be a highly
>> intelligent thoroughly educated bird."
>>
>> "Oh yeah?" the guy asks, "Then answer this -- how do you hang onto
>> your perch without any feet?"
>>
>> "Well," the parrot says, "this is very embarrassing but since you asked,
>> I wrap my weenie around this wooden bar like a little hook. You can't see it
>> because of my feathers."
>>
>> "Wow," says the guy. "You really can understand and speak English
>> can't you?"
>>
>> "Actually, I speak both Spanish and English, and I can converse with
>> reasonable competence on almost any topic: politics , religion,
>> sports, physics, philosophy. I'm especially good at ornithology. You
>> really ought to buy me. I'd be a great companion."
>>
>> The guy looks at the $200.00 price tag. "Sorry, but I just can't afford that."
>>
>> "Pssssssst," says the parrot, "I'm defective, so the truth is, nobody
>> wants me cause I don't have any feet. You can probably get me for $20; just make
>> the guy an offer!"
>>
>> The guy offers $20 and walks out with the parrot.
>>
>> Weeks go by. The parrot is sensational. He has a great sense of humor,
>> he's interesting, he's a great pal, he understands everything, he sympathizes,
>> and he's insightful. The guy is delighted.
>>
>> One day the guy comes home from work and the parrot goes,
>> "Psssssssssssst,"
>> and motions him over with one wing. "I don't know if I should tell you
>> this or not, but it's about your wife and the postman."
>>
>> "What are you talking about?" asks the guy.
>> "When the postman delivered the mail today, your wife greeted him at
>> the door in a sheer black nightie."
>>
>> "WHAT???" the guy asks incredulously. "THEN what happened?"
>>
>> "Well, then the postman came into the house and lifted up her nightie
>> and began petting her all over," reported the parrot.
>>
>> "NO!" he exclaims. "And she let him?"
>>
>> "Yes. Then he continued taking off the nightie, got down on his knees
>> and began to kiss her all over...."
>>
>> Then the frantic guy demands, "THEN WHAT HAPPENED?"
>>
>> "Damned if I know. I got a hard-on and fell off my perch!"
>>
>>
>> <~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
>> If this doesn't make you laugh, you're having a really bad day!!
| |
>> It doesn't have any feet or legs. The guy says aloud, "Jeesh, I wonder
>> what happened to this parrot?"
>>
>> The parrot says, "I was born this way. I'm a defective parrot."
>>
>> "Holy crap," the guy replies. "You actually understood and answered me!"
>>
>> "I got every word," says the parrot. "I happen to be a highly
>> intelligent thoroughly educated bird."
>>
>> "Oh yeah?" the guy asks, "Then answer this -- how do you hang onto
>> your perch without any feet?"
>>
>> "Well," the parrot says, "this is very embarrassing but since you asked,
>> I wrap my weenie around this wooden bar like a little hook. You can't see it
>> because of my feathers."
>>
>> "Wow," says the guy. "You really can understand and speak English
>> can't you?"
>>
>> "Actually, I speak both Spanish and English, and I can converse with
>> reasonable competence on almost any topic: politics , religion,
>> sports, physics, philosophy. I'm especially good at ornithology. You
>> really ought to buy me. I'd be a great companion."
>>
>> The guy looks at the $200.00 price tag. "Sorry, but I just can't afford that."
>>
>> "Pssssssst," says the parrot, "I'm defective, so the truth is, nobody
>> wants me cause I don't have any feet. You can probably get me for $20; just make
>> the guy an offer!"
>>
>> The guy offers $20 and walks out with the parrot.
>>
>> Weeks go by. The parrot is sensational. He has a great sense of humor,
>> he's interesting, he's a great pal, he understands everything, he sympathizes,
>> and he's insightful. The guy is delighted.
>>
>> One day the guy comes home from work and the parrot goes,
>> "Psssssssssssst,"
>> and motions him over with one wing. "I don't know if I should tell you
>> this or not, but it's about your wife and the postman."
>>
>> "What are you talking about?" asks the guy.
>> "When the postman delivered the mail today, your wife greeted him at
>> the door in a sheer black nightie."
>>
>> "WHAT???" the guy asks incredulously. "THEN what happened?"
>>
>> "Well, then the postman came into the house and lifted up her nightie
>> and began petting her all over," reported the parrot.
>>
>> "NO!" he exclaims. "And she let him?"
>>
>> "Yes. Then he continued taking off the nightie, got down on his knees
>> and began to kiss her all over...."
>>
>> Then the frantic guy demands, "THEN WHAT HAPPENED?"
>>
>> "Damned if I know. I got a hard-on and fell off my perch!"
>>
>>
>> <~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
>> If this doesn't make you laugh, you're having a really bad day!!
| |
