Expectations of SP Behaviour

[Cock Throppled]

Wrote elsewhere about an appointment with an SP that never materialized.

I feel a little bad about my comments, but the fact is none of it would have happened if the SP had been ready at the agreed-upon time.

I drove through horrible weather and heavy traffic to get to her designated area, called to get directions and she said she needed more time.

If I could navigate my way all the way to near her place in 1/2 an hour how could she not get ready in the same time frame?

I asked her to text her address when ready, which she never did. I had to leave after almost 15 minutes of waiting and called to tell her.

I have since been called a piece of shit by her (via text) for posting the experience. She also said she never gives out her address, just directions. (???)

This SP said I should have gone to her street (which I did) and she would have kept an eye out for me. I asked if I was supposed park on the street and guess where she lived, or go door to door asking for her?

So, I have a question - if I showed commitment by driving to an area designated by the SP at an agreed-upon time, was I wrong to expect the SP to be ready and be given an exact address? Even if she wasn't ready, was I entitled to be given an address at this point?

 

[kenchorney]

So what about the guys who no-show for us? My trip to Winnipeg was riddled with no-shows, and one is a perb member!

The no shows you had to deal with are more to do with jealous local Sp's who can't handle the competition. I'm afraid that happens here a lot. I don't know how many appointments you had booked but of all of them only one was a member he either had a legit reason or is an SP's lapdog. Just don't book him again.

I would suggest to all of the touring ladies to book only with guys who can provide a handle, it's easy enough to weed out the time wasters and chronic no shows that way.

 

[Alix Turner]

So what about the guys who no-show for us? My trip to Winnipeg was riddled with no-shows, and one is a perb member!

apples and oranges, it is up to the business owner to find the best way to turn a profit and pull in the kind of patronage that is best suited to their ideal. Often this means changing our business practices in order to correct for bad behaviour that is entirely on the customers end of things, since that is all we can control.

So, I have a question - if I showed commitment by driving to an area designated by the SP at an agreed-upon time, was I wrong to expect the SP to be ready and be given an exact address? Even if she wasn't ready, was I entitled to be given an address at this point?

On the other hand, as a customer, looking out for your better interest means considering the cost benefit ratio of going with a certain provider. If you would prefer to be fairly certain the appointment is going to happen, you might start insisting on seeing providers that are willing to provide you with their address in advance instead of following their lead and finding yourself in that situation.

 

[Volpina Vance]

I'm very surprised to learn about your SP calling you that name. Nobody deserves that. Something seemed to have caused this woman a very stressful hour, and I believe it was for the best that you weren't able to meet. Stress either party is unable to release can negatively impact an appointment. Sorry to hear about your experience in the rain - and I hope your mystery woman is doing better!

From the perspective of a fellow SP, I do understand her delaying giving out her specific address until she was completely ready, particularly if you already were having difficulty communicating. Sometimes we have very little information to go on about a client, and, for instance, a stressed tone over the phone can be read as impatience. Sometimes, discretion is not uppermost in clients' minds, and with the pertinent information in hand, you might have knocked too early. I wouldn't recommend for you to seek out this person again, as at this point it seems your experience of one another has been less than charming, and the extent to which this would affect your next session is simply unknown.

Puppy pile on Cock Thropped!

 

[Dgodus]

Well that's weak IMO and your situation has has no relevance to the discussion then. Cock said what SP stood him up and so he should have.

^This. As was said earlier no-shows can be common in Winnipeg, but however it isn't just fake appts being made by jealous local providers. I've heard from well reviewed and popular touring ladies that it is as well clients they've seen before and a few board members. If you say who it was and it isn't their habit to no show that will come to light. If it is their habit to flippantly arrange engagements which they don't honor that also will come to light, they'll be crucified on the board and the problem should lessen. You can be sure if I were to have legitimate problems with a provider (exceptions based on familiarity and unique situations apply of course) I would be saying so on the board.

 

[Cock Throppled]

I give out my address when the client books a solid appointment, even if it's a few days in advance. I do it as a sign of trust and professional courtesy to my clients. If I trust you enough to accept you as a new client, I trust you enough to give you my address. A new client won't worry about me being a flake, and is less likely to cancel if he has my address at the time of booking.

This process works well for me and I only have one or two no-shows per year.

That sounds professional and logical, but I don't even require that.

I can see an SP needing the extra commitment of getting the client nearby, but at that point why would there be an issue giving the location? And why not text when you're ready so the client doesn't arrive before she's ready? The whole thing is so stupid and could have been avoided. Her system is an accident waiting to happen with clients going to the wrong home,or whatever.

Because she insisted I said things I didn't I think she was talking to another potential client at the same time and got us mixed up. Very, very unprofessional. If she distrusts clients somuch maybe she's not cut out for it.

 

[violetblake]

I give out the incall address a half hour beforehand because of no-shows. When I was starting out I'd give it ahead of time, then I'd get a no-show, and so this person I'd never met who has proven to be a flake now has the address. I've never lived at my incall, but I still don't like sketchy people knowing the address. I'm very selective of who I see, and I confirm the day before and a half hour before the appointment. By that point I know whether that person is legit or not, and at that point I'll give the address. (although I always give the general area)

That being said, this SP's behaviour is a little odd. She should definitely still give you the address eventually lol.

 

[Frank Dux]

I keenly remember being left out in the rain several times, particularly by Dahlia Dawn, who ended up being notorious for it. I confirmed with her over the phone half an hour before the session, followed her texted directions to the incall building, and then texted her 5 minutes early for the buzzer & apartment number. I received a text that she was running a little late and she'd text me back, then never heard from her again. No response to a text I sent 20 minutes late, nor a polite voice mail message I left after another 15 minutes. Not even an e-mail apology or explanation, just a bunch of new ads in the advertisers forum the next day.

It was a miserable experience and a complete waste of my time. I don't think there's anything wrong with leaving a negative review for being stood up with no contact or explanation, provided the client's story is completely legit. It works the other way too - SPs hold clients accountable for no-shows all the time on PERB. It's a review board, after all.

That being said, being late for a session or having to cancel due to emergency is totally forgivable, as long as the parties remain in contact with each other & try to give as much notice as possible. I've had to miss appointments due to work and have always always made up for it. I've also had other SPs cancel appointments due to unforeseen circumstances and most have been very apologetic & open to rescheduling.

 

[Dgodus]

No real point in getting a specific address if she's not ready. Really at that point it's more of a question of wether you're being stood up or not and how professional someone is in being ready promptly. I see alot of touring women and most give me their hotel when I book, some wait till a day or two before, one used to only say which hotel when you called around 2hrs before. However nearly all only give their room number when they are actually ready for you to knock on their door (I frequent Brandon and telus didn't have service for awhile there so room #'s were emailed to me beforehand - only 1 provider and 1 agency ever gave me the room number well beforehand unprompted).

Just give me an a location within a couple minutes walk of your actual place beforehand so I can get there at my leisure, and be ready when the session is set for (10-15mins is acceptable to me, but I don't have a busy schedule nor do I book rendez vous under time constraints), that's all I expect as far as that's concerned and I believe that to be very fair.

 

[Dgodus]

I'm curious to know what constitutes a hobbyist having his game super dialed.

I'm not asking to be snide or sarcastic. It's just I always chuckle when I see "hobbyist x posted his retirement". Clients/customers don't really retire, people with jobs retire. I know it's just a saying but it strikes me as self inflating somewhat and I snicker a little.

 

[sevenofnine]

It sounds like an arguement I had with an sp over a no show.
It bothered me that she lied about the no show instead of just saying something like couldn't make it sorry, she lied and blamed me for getting her instructions wrong. Which I did not. Like I said it bothered me that she felt the need to lie about it and we got into it.

A piece of advice, it is not worth fighting with an sp. She can delete everything and too way too many white nights and well other people who will just natural take her side. Just walk away, from experiance don't get into it with an sp. Just take your bruises and take a walk.


And I agree with the earlier sp's comments no shows are a problem for both of us in this women and us guys.
It is just rude to stand some one up. Bad and rude not to try and tell someone they can't make it and worse to lie about it when you do stand some one up. I agree its not good for either of us, men or women.

 

[badbadboy]

Wrote elsewhere about an appointment with an SP that never materialized.

I feel a little bad about my comments, but the fact is none of it would have happened if the SP had been ready at the agreed-upon time.

I drove through horrible weather and heavy traffic to get to her designated area, called to get directions and she said she needed more time.

If I could navigate my way all the way to near her place in 1/2 an hour how could she not get ready in the same time frame?

I asked her to text her address when ready, which she never did. I had to leave after almost 15 minutes of waiting and called to tell her.

I have since been called a piece of shit by her (via text) for posting the experience. She also said she never gives out her address, just directions. (???)

This SP said I should have gone to her street (which I did) and she would have kept an eye out for me. I asked if I was supposed park on the street and guess where she lived, or go door to door asking for her?

So, I have a question - if I showed commitment by driving to an area designated by the SP at an agreed-upon time, was I wrong to expect the SP to be ready and be given an exact address? Even if she wasn't ready, was I entitled to be given an address at this point?

Sometimes things just don't go according to plan. She could have let you know well in advance if there was going to be a delay or if she was going to cancel because of some sort of personal emergency etc.

It works both ways. I usually try to book a week in advance if I can see my calendar being clear on a certain day. Unfortunately, sometimes I get last minute calls to meetings or conference calls which I have no control over. I have had to cancel twice on a certain SP who I really like and she was quite nice about it. I am sure it bothered her that I pulled these no shows even though I gave a polite apology.

I did book with a traveling SP at her hotel a few years ago. I arrived 10 minutes ahead of time after an hour drive to get there and she texted saying she was cancelling me. I replied back asking her why and how come she couldn't have let me know ahead of time so didn't have to drive an hour to get to her hotel. Her reply was she went over time with the first client and needed a break before the one right after me. WTF? Thanks! She replied back basically saying shit happens and she would make it up to me the next day at a small discount if I was still interested. I didn't bother replying and just wrote her off as a flake who booked too many clients back to back.

 

[tokugawa]

Common courtesy unfortunately does not always exist in this industry. For every SP that responds in a timely matter and provides clear instructions on the first meeting, there are those that make it a challenge. Ideally, you make an appointment, it is confirmed and she provides you with all the necessary contact and meeting details. If not, then she at least provides you with the instructions how she'd like to proceed. In the case of if she says she's going to let you know (Confirmation) on the day of or before, then I DO expect her to let you know as per her instructions. Though providing confirmation details 30 minutes prior to a meeting to me is a bit unreasonable. For example, traveling from Burnaby in rush hour to downtown Vancouver takes more than 30 minutes and not everyone's home or work is on the Expo line. In any case, you got a 50 50 chance of it working out. If it seems like a hassle (details not provided or having to do email tag) to you, then maybe it's better to skip it.

 

[Miss*Bijou]

So what about the guys who no-show for us? My trip to Winnipeg was riddled with no-shows, and one is a perb member!

Shitty to hear that. I had the same experience there a few years ago, so I never went back. It's too bad because the appointments I did have were great. I was too annoyed with the no-shows and sneaky guys not wanting to call from unrestricted numbers to go again.



As for the OP's issue...

I usually only give the address when I'm ready but when they call to confirm 30 minutes before the appointment, I do give them the intersection where they can find parking. I ask them to call or text for the exact address when they've arrived.

Sometimes it depends on what type of housing it is... I used to live in a busy highrise, where it's not such a huge deal if someone is waiting at or near the entrance waiting for the buzzer code or if someone has the address and never shows up. But sometimes the set-up is such that you just can't risk having a client do either and draw attention or make you feel at risk.

I think giving info on where to park without giving the exact address in advance is an acceptable compromise. No ones ever complained so I assume it's not a problem. lol

 

[Cock Throppled]

Shitty to hear that. I had the same experience there a few years ago, so I never went back. It's too bad because the appointments I did have were great. I was too annoyed with the no-shows and sneaky guys not wanting to call from unrestricted numbers to go again.



As for the OP's issue...

I usually only give the address when I'm ready but when they call to confirm 30 minutes before the appointment, I do give them the intersection where they can find parking. I ask them to call or text for the exact address when they've arrived.

Sometimes it depends on what type of housing it is... I used to live in a busy highrise, where it's not such a huge deal if someone is waiting at or near the entrance waiting for the buzzer code or if someone has the address and never shows up. But sometimes the set-up is such that you just can't risk having a client do either and draw attention or make you feel at risk.

I think giving info on where to park without giving the exact address in advance is an acceptable compromise. No ones ever complained so I assume it's not a problem. lol

But her approach is completely indiscreet. It's residential and means a guy would have to park on the street and wait for directions or drive back and forth int he block. I went to the nearest intersection and asked her to text address when she was ready. At that point I've made the commitment.

She claims she doesn't want to give her address to police. If the police even cared I'm sure they could never figure out the address by getting directions to the location. Whole approach is nuts.

 

[Sucre]

Often if a girl lives in an apartment building they give address and ask you to call for buzzer number once actually in front, (so they can see you in camera/intercom) No risk as it’s a big building. I recall on more than one occasion being given the wrong address, namely an apartment building across the street and then when I call for the buzzer number, they look out and see me and they direct me to correct address. No real problems as long as they answer when you arrive and promptly give you buzzer or correct directions, all in time to park and make your appointment. I do not consider walking time to be my time.

But I have also had times I had to drive 30 minutes with no address but instructions that they will tell me when I am in neighbourhood, but when you arrive and call you are there, no answer. (and no answer on call backs) –has not happened recently because of my solution)

Other times I have had vague instructions of an intersection; call when you arrive, but not before time (as they not ready or maybe have another client – who knows) . Arrive and have to guess where to park, finally park as close to that intersection as possible and call. At the appointed time they call and give me an address ½ mile away. Now there is no way I am going to get there in the 30 seconds they have allotted.

Solution, if they will not give at least the building or where to park (and within 2 minutes walking distance) before I set out, I skip the appointment. You will be flustered and will not enjoy it anyway. Out (Giving driving, parking and walking time you probably need this info at least 30 minutes before the appointment) ( they are not ready but you are not either, you still need to get there)