So I’m sitting in the room at Elite Retreat with the lovely Ms. Kat. I know some of you are asking “Kat? Who’s Kat?”. Kat does what Ms. Jade does when Ms. Jade is not doing what Ms. Jade does (that is, she is not Puddles, but not Notpuddles… which might make her Ms. Notnotpuddles or Ms. Newnotpuddles… too hard to decide, so she’s Ms. Kat…). In any case, Ms. Kat and I are looking at each other... me, I have a nervous and sheepish smile, and she is looking decidedly… Cheshire.
Ms. Kat: “You’re back!”
Rabbit: “I beg your pardon... back?”
Ms. Kat: “You were just here. JUST here.”
Rabbit: “I think you have me confused with someone else…”
Ms. Kat: “We don’t exactly get a lot of your type here.”
Rabbit: “My type?”
Ms. Kat: “You know… ears… whiskers… PAWS….”
Rabbit: “Sounds like a handsome fellow. Chicks must dig him.”
*…prolonged silence as they stare at each other, sharing an ‘inside joke’ moment…*
Rabbit: “So… the lady you have for me… this Katie? Kassandra?...”
Ms. Kat: “Kendra.”
Rabbit: “Right, right… Kendra. Is she pretty?”
Ms. Kat: “You JUST saw her. In this room! I started your freakin’ shower!!”
Bunny: “Wasn’t me. Now back to this Kendra lady… is she pretty???”
Ms. Kat: “Centrefold pretty.”
Rabbit: “Ooooh! And is she happy, and sweet, and bubbly?”
Ms. Kat: “I’d say so, yes.”
Rabbit: “And does she like rabbits?”
Ms. Kat (tired of the little game now, but still very pleasant, she moves to send Ms. Kendra in to play an altogether different ‘little game’): “Ask her yourself. Shall I have her bring you another juice box?”
Rabbit: “Yes plea… err… I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
…
Rabbit: “But a juice box would be nice. Thank you.”
Turns out, Ms. Kat was right about everything. About me having just been there. About me being a bad penny (Bad bunny? Dunno… it sounded like “penny”…). And especially about Ms. Kendra… a happy, bubbly, friendly, sweet, sexy, bloody knockout. And she was driving me SNAKEY-BONKERS all weekend. I couldn’t stop thinking about her. And I couldn’t stop running over to see her. I was like a quarter-hour clock (yes clock, you dirty buggers… rabbits are nothing like boy chickens). Only it was more like every three hours that I was ringing. And singing. And tickling. And having a swingin’, snorting, sweating, grande ol’ hoot (dang, she's nice to me...).
*thumpthumpthumpthumpthump*
F#ck, is Ms. Kendra awesome.
Happy thumping, all!
P.S. Speaking of Ms. Puddles, I got to see her today! I passed her a love note on one of those coloured pieces of paper that everyone seems to like so much, but I must have buggered it up (wouldn’t even give me her number, darnit ). Thank goodness Ms. Kendra was able to spend another whole hour consoling me…
Ms. Kat: “You’re back!”
Rabbit: “I beg your pardon... back?”
Ms. Kat: “You were just here. JUST here.”
Rabbit: “I think you have me confused with someone else…”
Ms. Kat: “We don’t exactly get a lot of your type here.”
Rabbit: “My type?”
Ms. Kat: “You know… ears… whiskers… PAWS….”
Rabbit: “Sounds like a handsome fellow. Chicks must dig him.”
*…prolonged silence as they stare at each other, sharing an ‘inside joke’ moment…*
Rabbit: “So… the lady you have for me… this Katie? Kassandra?...”
Ms. Kat: “Kendra.”
Rabbit: “Right, right… Kendra. Is she pretty?”
Ms. Kat: “You JUST saw her. In this room! I started your freakin’ shower!!”
Bunny: “Wasn’t me. Now back to this Kendra lady… is she pretty???”
Ms. Kat: “Centrefold pretty.”
Rabbit: “Ooooh! And is she happy, and sweet, and bubbly?”
Ms. Kat: “I’d say so, yes.”
Rabbit: “And does she like rabbits?”
Ms. Kat (tired of the little game now, but still very pleasant, she moves to send Ms. Kendra in to play an altogether different ‘little game’): “Ask her yourself. Shall I have her bring you another juice box?”
Rabbit: “Yes plea… err… I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
…
Rabbit: “But a juice box would be nice. Thank you.”
Turns out, Ms. Kat was right about everything. About me having just been there. About me being a bad penny (Bad bunny? Dunno… it sounded like “penny”…). And especially about Ms. Kendra… a happy, bubbly, friendly, sweet, sexy, bloody knockout. And she was driving me SNAKEY-BONKERS all weekend. I couldn’t stop thinking about her. And I couldn’t stop running over to see her. I was like a quarter-hour clock (yes clock, you dirty buggers… rabbits are nothing like boy chickens). Only it was more like every three hours that I was ringing. And singing. And tickling. And having a swingin’, snorting, sweating, grande ol’ hoot (dang, she's nice to me...).
*thumpthumpthumpthumpthump*
F#ck, is Ms. Kendra awesome.
Happy thumping, all!
P.S. Speaking of Ms. Puddles, I got to see her today! I passed her a love note on one of those coloured pieces of paper that everyone seems to like so much, but I must have buggered it up (wouldn’t even give me her number, darnit
). Thank goodness Ms. Kendra was able to spend another whole hour consoling me… 