The Porn Dude

CL Kayla - Review

SlimShady

I like to poon.
Oct 29, 2002
858
4
18
Hey guys!!!!!

I am a young, hot sexy brunette looking to spend time with all you Calgary guys!!!. I am 25 yrs old, 5ft6, 125 lbs, busty, clean and shaven. I offer my boys a kinky experience you are sure not to forget!!!!

Incalls
some out calls
100% drug Free!!!!!

Sweet and Sassy

1 hour.....200 roses
half.......150 roses
15mins.....100 roses

***305*****0721

CALL NOW!!!!!

Love
Kayla





Thought why the hell not. The pics looked good and the price seemed reasonable for $100 for 15 minutes. I had fun with Kinky Dawn for $100 and this ad seemed alike.

Dialed up the number and was told to call when I got down to 15 ST and 12 Ave. It's an apartment at 1535 12 ST. I punched in the code and was buzzed in to the apartment. She opened the door and she looked ok. Wearing jeans and a white top I thought mmmmm....ok. A little bigger than the pictures but hey I could work this. She seemed pleasant. She had a blonde roomie crashed on the couch.

Gave her the 4 rolls of loonies and I started to undress. She started to take off her jeans and her shirt. She wasn't toned at all and kind of looked chubby in the midsection. Not sure if she had a kid or not. A couple of tats here and there.

I laid on the bed no wait....inflatable mattress covered with a sheet. For the angle it was at it was probably an inflatable boat. Wasn't comfortable at all. Sheet kept making this stupid noise with every movement. The towel on the window was a nice touch too.

She gets on the bed in her bra and panties. She bring a condom and puts it on me. I thought this isn't going rignt. I will give her a moment to make herself more comfortable. She starts with a HJ for about a minute. I'm thinking to myself What The Fuck??? Did I just pay for a $100 covered HJ. Fine. I'll give her a minute. She was trying for a speed record the way she was jacking my cock. Trying to keep erect as I mentally make a note how to make the best of the situation. She finally puts her mouth on it and for maybe 10 head bobs she goes back to the HJ.

I ask her if the FS was coming since she hadn't removed her bra or panties. She said for the 15 minutes it doesn't include FS. FUCK! I said to myself. I could have went a few blocks over and had Dawn ride me CGTC for the same $.

Her technique left something to be desired. I was touching her ass trying to stay erect. Everytime I would attempt to grab some boobage she would do the arm block. Again a big WTF. This was getting dumb. She's still jackhammering away. She puts it back in her mouth for 2 pumps and then back to the vigourous exercise she calls a 15 minute special. There is no way I'm popping at the rate she is going. I grab matters into my own hands. She at least looked at me and said she wanted me to come. I moved her hand to have her rub my balls and she pulled away. I again thought to myself never again with her. Finally thought about something I could pop to instead of being let down with this encounter.

Gave myself a CHJ while she sat there. At least she offered to clean up after with kleenex. I declined as I didn't want kleenex sticking to the tip of my cock until I showered. Got dressed and left.

The pictures are older or at least blurry enough to think that she is hotter than she is. Don't know about the 25. Don't know about the weight. She sure isn't busty. Not with that padded bra she was wearing. I guess I did enjoy that she had new jeans on. The stairway was well lit.......that's about all I can say about that piss poor encounter.

I Am.

Not Going To Give a Review of My Self Service HJ.

SlimShady
 

Mick Shagher

Member
Nov 20, 2005
2,583
3
0
On Top Of Her
First the Massage Health Center and now this. SlimShady's poor dick seems to be taking a beating.

I can't wait to hear what his next misadventure will be. I must say that his experiances are somewhat amusing,(even though I'm sure he didn't think so at the time), only because most of us have similar stories of our own.
 

freakychef

Unregistered Abuser
Apr 23, 2003
727
2
0
55
In my own imagination!!
Slim why do you.............

...............do that too yourself?? Ha Ha. Man your little guy is gonna start hating you??
 

deberry

New member
Jul 15, 2007
181
0
0
Holy shit!

I haven't laughed this hard in a long time! Holy fuck that sounded so funny. I was actually thinking of seeing that girl from CL but no longer. Thanks for the heads up or down in this case. Gave yourself a CHJ LMFAO! You gotta hate these experiences but SlimShady is like PERB's own canary in the coal mine.

That was so funny to read. Man you should make a book of all these.
 
Ashley Madison
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