Calif. police arrest naked man with concealed weapon

The Lizard King

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Jul 8, 2003
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Gold, pure gold......

‘You can’t get much more concealed than that’
Police arrest naked man after he allegedly said he had a tool in his rectum

Updated: 2:21 a.m. PT Nov 4, 2006
EL CERRITO, Calif. - A man was arrested on suspicion of carrying a concealed weapon after police found him outdoors — naked — and he told them he had a tool in his rectum, authorities said.

The man was lying on a tree stump, masturbating beside a nature path, near a Bay Area Rapid Transit station Thursday, police said.

John Sheehan, 33, of Pittsburg, was initially arrested on suspicion of indecent exposure. But when asked whether he was carrying anything police should know about, Sheehan mentioned the tool, said El Cerrito Detective Cpl. Don Horgan.

“You can’t get much more concealed than that,” Horgan said.

Officers drew their weapons and firefighters were called to the scene. Sheehan removed a 6-inch metal awl wrapped in black electrical tape without incident.

Sheehan, who was paroled from state prison last week, was then booked into jail on suspicion of parole violations, indecent exposure and one felony count of possessing a concealed weapon.

“When you’re talking about an awl or an ice pick and you’re dealing with somebody who’s fresh out of prison, it’s a weapon. That’s a stabbing instrument,” Horgan said.

It was not immediately clear what Sheehan was on parole for. A person answering the phone at the jail Friday night did not know whether Sheehan had a lawyer.
 

Fudd

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Hey if they also find a hamster in there they can also charge him with animal abuse

"dealing with somebody who’s fresh out of prison, it’s a weapon. That’s a stabbing instrument,” Hey there's a joke in there somewhere :D
 

The Lizard King

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Only in the US would they not be SURE that what he was doing was a parole violation.
Maybe...but I bet if he was busted in West Van they at least would have poured him a shot while they were coming to that conclusion!
 

gravitas

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A slightly different version of the story

Nude man has anal screwdriver
Friday, November 3, 2006

A naked man arrested for indecent exposure in California was held at gunpoint – on suspicion of carrying a concealed weapon.

At this point, you might be wondering exactly where a naked man might conceal a weapon. We can confirm that the most wince-inducing possibility you're thinking of is the correct one.

He had a screwdriver hidden in his anus.

The police were first called in El Cerrito, California, on Thursday morning after reports that a naked man was masturbating in public, lying against a tree stump.

After arresting the man, identified as John Sheehan, for his masturbatory fun, Sergeant Paul Keith was about to put the man in the back of his car – but first, he asked him if there was anything the police should know about.

The man responded that he was concealing a screwdriver in his anal cavity. Which was honest of him.

Understandably, the police were a unsure what to do about this situation. So naturally, they called the fire brigade.

History doesn't record what the fire fighters said - we're guessing it was something along the lines of 'why the hell did you just call us to remove screwdriver from a man's bottom?' – but they soon came to the decision that a hospital would probably be the best place to extract an anal screwdriver.

At this point, the man offered to take out the screwdriver himself.

El Cerrito police spokesman Detective Corporal Don Horgan said: 'When he heard what they were talking about he said, “Hey, don't worry about it. I can do it.”'

So, held at gunpoint in case he tried any funny business, Sheehan removed a six-inch long metal screwdriver wrapped in electrical tape.

Sheehan was subsequently taken to jail – from which he was out on parole – without offering an explanation of what the screwdriver had been doing up his anus.


jjinvan said:
Only in the US would they not be SURE that what he was doing was a parole violation.
Actually their response sounded down right Canadian. Had this been anywhere other than the Bay area, oh lets say Texas, they would have shot him first checked for asshole contraband later.
 

Stew

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In response to The Lizard King's comment, in West Van you get more than one shot. How else do you blow around .2 after partying at headquarters......

stew
 
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