Booking an indy: Tips, tricks, dos and don'ts

[LC18]

This thread has originally been posted on Merb right here
I know a lot of you wish to make your booking experience short and sweet so let me help you.


Read the provider's website
You don't like deposits, screenings or sending your ID? Make sure you read their ads and websites as they will for sure let you know what information they require. This will save you time because there's nothing more frustrating than finding THE one, sending a message and realizing you cannot go further in the planning process. You will not make them change their mind, if they require a deposit, nothing you will say will make them skip that part.

Know what you want and ask for it
You want this to be done within 3-4 text messages/emails? Give all the information required in the first text message/email. There is absolutely no need for you to send an introduction message that doesn't contain the information the provider might need to book you. Keep your "hey what's good today?" for another day. I know you mean well and you want to make it more personal but a lof of my colleagues will see it as "time wasting" and won't even engage.

Hello so&so,

My name is Mr. X and I would like to know if you're available on [date] for a [duration] session. I would like an [incall/outcall] session. Let me know what information you would need to complete the booking.

Thank you,
X

I would like to book a provider to be my date for an event. Will I have to pay the same rates?
Trips, concerts, restaurant and all that jazz can sometimes be a puzzle. A lot of us have what we call a "social rate" which is lower than our regular rates and allow people to book us for non-intimate events such as but not limited to: business cocktails, concerts, museum dates

If you don't see social rate on a provider's website or ad, ask nicely but do not suggest a price as it is considered rude.

Hello so&so,

I've noticed you don't have social rates, I have this event coming up and I would love for you to be my date. [give as much details as you can so that she can give you a quote] Let me know what information you would need to complete the booking.

Thank you,
X

A few will have a totally different section reserved to travelling, whether you fly her to you or you depart together. If it's not there, once again ask nicely but do not suggest a rate. If you've seen her a few times or if it's something she really wants to do, she might even give you a discount. I know of a friend who really wanted to go to Toqué! in Montreal so she lowered her dinner date rates but only if you were to take her there.

Can I know what's on your menu?
This question has probably made you lose your chance with a provider. While it's fair to ask what one might offer, there are certainly ways to ask. You could for instance, share what you like or need and ask the provider if that's something they offer.

"Hello so&so,

My name is Mr. X and I would like to know if you're available on [date] for a [duration] session. I would like an [incall/outcall] session. Let me know what information you would need to complete the booking. I am really into deep French kissing and kinkier things like COF. Are those things you offer?

Thank you,
X"

I am married or I have a partner. Discretion is a must for me, how do I play safe?
If you need the provider to be scent & makeup free meaning; no perfume, no scented body lotions, no body oil, no lipstick, no foundation
Let her know ahead, not everyone has fragrance free products so it's good to know a bit in advance in case they might need to find the said products. Same goes for asking her to dress more modestly if you are going to meet in public or if you want her to meet you at your hotel/residence. While none of us walk around with a neon sign that says I AM AN ESCORT, mentioning that you would prefer a more neutral outfit is totally fine.

How do I know she's not going to scam me?
Do your homework. Are the photos legit? Is she only advertising on one website? Is there any reviews? Is she active on twitter? Those are some good questions you can ask yourself before sending money. A reputable provider would not jeopardize her reputation over $50 while she can make more by actually seeing you.

References. I have never seen an independent companion before what do I do?
Some ask for references, some don't. Some will also not provide references. If you used to see someone in an agency and they have an active twitter account, you could ask the provider if they would accept to contact them on there. You should always give the most recent provider you've seen as a reference as many of us think it is strange that you always use the same person as a ref if you've seen 2 other companions after.

Screening: You want my what?
Some escorts will ask you to send a photo of a not expired government issued photo ID to make sure you are who you pretend to be and to make sure you are not a serious criminal. Some may ask for a link to your LinkedIn profile. Maybe they would ask you to send them a private message on a reputable review board. Whatever the screening they might have, you must comply or move on. Arguing over their screening protocol is not going to get you any further. There are many providers that do not require sensitive information from you. Just go with them.

I'd like to bring a gift. Is that ok?
Gifts are never mandatory but always appreciated. I recommend that you either find her wishlist or ask the person directly. You wouldn't want to bring a bottle of wine to someone who's been sober for months or chocolate covered almonds to someone who is deadly allergic so always ask before you bring anything. Twitter can be a good place to find out what a provider might be into or might like.

Confirm and do not cancel last minute
I know some of you have very unpredictable schedules but as much as you can, do not cancel last minute. It's ok to cancel but you have to let them know, don't just ghost them. A lot of us have to book a space to host you and it's not free so when you cancel last minute, you are putting the provider in a very unpleasant position. Apologize and ask if it's possible to re schedule. Some might have a cancellation policy, I recommend you read it thoroughly if you have an uncertain schedule. They will usually send you a message the day before or a few hours before to reconfirm, now would also be a good time to let them know if your plans have changed.

The envelope
An envelope makes it less awkward to hand cash to someone. If you meet in public you might even use a birthday card to hide the money. The provider will most likely excuse themselves to the bathroom to count the money. Is she going to run away with my money? No, not if you've done your homework and made sure she was a reputable provider. If you decide to go with the envelope, It's recommended that you do not seal it as it will be easier for the provider to count the money.

Other useful info
How to introduce yourself like a pro
Gift ideas

Any other questions or concerns, I'd be happy to help or clarify.

LC

 

[westwoody]

Excellent post.
One addition: don’t argue over prices or screening, or demand to be an exception because you are “special”.
Don’t like her rules? Move on, end of discussion.

 

[masterpoonhunter]

Second what Westwood wrote.
And really, point #1, the all important, READ what her ad says. Comprehensively READ it. Ask intelligent questions when a clarification etc is needed. From that point on it should be pretty straightforward.
But it seems reading in particular comprehensively, is becoming a lost art.

 

[Shantiex6969x]

Love it

 

[rubylabellexo]

Our lives would be so much easier if everyone would just reeaaaadddddd the 100 words in our ads. Even better if they reeaaaaadddddd the website too 🤣

I'll never understand the mentality. Spamming 20 different escorts with 'hi' and then asking them to spoon-feed all their info, only to say 'oh I don't send deposits' or 'you're too expensive' in the end? That wastes so much more time than just taking 20 seconds to read 🤷‍♀️

 

[LC18]

Reading comprehension is a lost art I’m telling you

 

[Hawker17]

Reading comprehension is a lost art I’m telling you

i think also we have lost respect for eachother and above all else common sense.

Last night i was having a discussion with my regular SP and i was blown away at some of the ways guys respond and harass you ladies. Like it made me sick type of feeling, i commend you all for keeping your composure as frankly i dont have the same level of patience even in my own business. I believe we are getting worse as a society not better lately.

i also asked if you think people are getting better or worse as related to the current state of the economy and their attitudes, so i will ask the same here.

 

[masterpoonhunter]

Are people becoming worse as a society you ask?

The whole thing is degraded in my opinion but look at all of what is going on around us? People are freaked out. Prices going through the roof, developers pushing people out of their homes, stranger attacks, a legal vs justice vs criminal system that is FUCKED UP, no accountability at the government and control side of things ... want more? There is lots.

Anyone remember the movie Network? "I'm Mad as Hell and I'm Not Going to Take it Anymore". Except if you do scream that out your window, most will just carry on and not give a shit. They can't. They're too busy surviving.

People are still people, with 99.99% decent, well meaning and kind. But stress is coming out in a fuck of a lot of ways.

That and back to the OP taking the moment to step back and think.

MPH Out.

 

[FreeG]

One other recommendation related to texts: let the SW know if it’s ok to respond whenever she gets to it, during a set time, or neither.

I know some SW’s won’t respond after a certain time has passed to err on side of discretion, so you may think she’s ghosting/ignoring when in reality she’s being considerate.

 

[LC18]

Updated to add the following points: Acronyms and envelopes

 

[rubylabellexo]

One other recommendation related to texts: let the SW know if it’s ok to respond whenever she gets to it, during a set time, or neither.

I know some SW’s won’t respond after a certain time has passed to err on side of discretion, so you may think she’s ghosting/ignoring when in reality she’s being considerate.

This!! A 'please feel free to reply at any time' if appropriate is very helpful.

 

[LC18]

Bumping this for the new users

 

[rebelwithsomecause]

This thread has originally been posted on Merb right here
I know a lot of you wish to make your booking experience short and sweet so let me help you.


Read the provider's website
You don't like deposits, screenings or sending your ID? Make sure you read their ads and websites as they will for sure let you know what information they require. This will save you time because there's nothing more frustrating than finding THE one, sending a message and realizing you cannot go further in the planning process. You will not make them change their mind, if they require a deposit, nothing you will say will make them skip that part.

Know what you want and ask for it
You want this to be done within 3-4 text messages/emails? Give all the information required in the first text message/email. There is absolutely no need for you to send an introduction message that doesn't contain the information the provider might need to book you. Keep your "hey what's good today?" for another day. I know you mean well and you want to make it more personal but a lof of my colleagues will see it as "time wasting" and won't even engage.

Hello so&so,

My name is Mr. X and I would like to know if you're available on [date] for a [duration] session. I would like an [incall/outcall] session. Let me know what information you would need to complete the booking.

Thank you,
X

I would like to book a provider to be my date for an event. Will I have to pay the same rates?
Trips, concerts, restaurant and all that jazz can sometimes be a puzzle. A lot of us have what we call a "social rate" which is lower than our regular rates and allow people to book us for non-intimate events such as but not limited to: business cocktails, concerts, museum dates

If you don't see social rate on a provider's website or ad, ask nicely but do not suggest a price as it is considered rude.

Hello so&so,

I've noticed you don't have social rates, I have this event coming up and I would love for you to be my date. [give as much details as you can so that she can give you a quote] Let me know what information you would need to complete the booking.

Thank you,
X

A few will have a totally different section reserved to travelling, whether you fly her to you or you depart together. If it's not there, once again ask nicely but do not suggest a rate. If you've seen her a few times or if it's something she really wants to do, she might even give you a discount. I know of a friend who really wanted to go to Toqué! so she lowered her dinner date rates but only if you were to take her there.

Can I know what's on your menu?
This question has probably made you lose your chance with a provider. While it's fair to ask what one might offer, there are certainly ways to ask. You could for instance, share what you like or need and ask the provider if that's something they offer.

"Hello so&so,

My name is Mr. X and I would like to know if you're available on [date] for a [duration] session. I would like an [incall/outcall] session. Let me know what information you would need to complete the booking. I am really into deep French kissing and kinkier things like COF. Are those things you offer?

Thank you,
X"

I am married or I have a partner. Discretion is a must for me, how do I play safe?
If you need the provider to be scent & makeup free meaning; no perfume, no scented body lotions, no body oil, no lipstick, no foundation
Let her know ahead, not everyone has fragrance free products so it's good to know a bit in advance in case they might need to find the said products. Same goes for asking her to dress more modestly if you are going to meet in public or if you want her to meet you at your hotel/residence. While none of us walk around with a neon sign that says I AM AN ESCORT, mentioning that you would prefer a more neutral outfit is totally fine.

How do I know she's not going to scam me?
Do your homework. Are the photos legit? Is she only advertising on one website? Is there any reviews? Is she active on twitter? Those are some good questions you can ask yourself before sending money. A reputable provider would not jeopardize her reputation over $50 while she can make more by actually seeing you.

References. I have never seen an independent companion before what do I do?
Some ask for references, some don't. Some will also not provide references. If you used to see someone in an agency and they have an active twitter account, you could ask the provider if they would accept to contact them on there. You should always give the most recent provider you've seen as a reference as many of us think it is strange that you always use the same person as a ref if you've seen 2 other companions after.

I'd like to bring a gift. Is that ok?
Gifts are never mandatory but always appreciated. I recommend that you either find her wishlist or ask the person directly. You wouldn't want to bring a bottle of wine to someone who's been sober for months or chocolate covered almonds to someone who is deadly allergic so always ask before you bring anything. Twitter can be a good place to find out what a provider might be into or might like.

Confirm and do not cancel last minute
I know some of you have very unpredictable schedules but as much as you can, do not cancel last minute. It's ok to cancel but you have to let them know, don't just ghost them. A lot of us have to book a space to host you and it's not free so when you cancel last minute, you are putting the provider in a very unpleasant position. Apologize and ask if it's possible to re schedule. Some might have a cancellation policy, I recommend you read it thoroughly if you have an uncertain schedule. They will usually send you a message the day before or a few hours before to reconfirm, now would also be a good time to let them know if your plans have changed.

The envelope
An envelope makes it less awkward to hand cash to someone. If you meet in public you might even use a birthday card to hide the money. The provider will most likely excuse themselves to the bathroom to count the money. Is she going to run away with my money? No, not if you've done your homework and made sure she was a reputable provider. If you decide to go with the envelope, It's recommended that you do not seal it as it will be easier for the provider to count the money.


Any other questions or concerns, I'd be happy to help or clarify.

LC

Great post Lena!! Really appreciate all the intellectual labour that went into this 👏

 

[Sonny69]

Reading comprehension is a lost art I’m telling you

Fact is some people have a reading allergy.

 

[PuntMeister]

Facts is some people have a reading allergy.

Too bad for them.

Laziness is not an allergy, and if booking an SP, it’s down right dis-respectful imho to ask about stuff or challenge stuff that’s in her add or on her website.

We’ve all had out ‘little-head” moments, but frankly the behaviour of many horny pooners toward sexy SP’s is often immature, gutteral, and stupid. And these fuktards clog up the bandwidth and turn off good legit babes, making it harder for sincere respectful gents to get through.

I’m mad as hell, and I’m not going to take it any more!

No excuses—ban the lazy stupid idiots that troll escortis and denegrate the image of men down to annoying vermin. It would be epic if clients (and newbie SP’s) needed to pass a basic literacy and respect vetting before being allowed to pester the world with their innane incomprehensible drivel.

Bring on ChatSP!

 

[LC18]

Updated to add the following point: screening

 

[Cock Throppled]

Re: the original post, I'm not sure I know any reputable, long-term Sp who doesn't know to not use fragrances. Or to provide scentless soap. What's the point of showering away perfume, if you come home smelling of a soap that's never used at home? That would seem to me a basic understanding for an SP.

 

[LC18]

Re: the original post, I'm not sure I know any reputable, long-term Sp who doesn't know to not use fragrances. Or to provide scentless soap. What's the point of showering away perfume, if you come home smelling of a soap that's never used at home? That would seem to me a basic understanding for an SP.

I used to work in a…let’s call it what it was, a brothel and most girls would spray themselves with very sweet fragrances. I can’t remember what the soap would like but I can only imagine it was some kind of fruity sugary scent.

So no, not everyone pay attention to those kind of details.

 

[MB Mod]

Updated to add the following point: screening

Members are cautioned that discussing screening procedures is against the rules!

 

[cautiouslyassesing]

This thread has originally been posted on Merb right here
I know a lot of you wish to make your booking experience short and sweet so let me help you.


Read the provider's website
You don't like deposits, screenings or sending your ID? Make sure you read their ads and websites as they will for sure let you know what information they require. This will save you time because there's nothing more frustrating than finding THE one, sending a message and realizing you cannot go further in the planning process. You will not make them change their mind, if they require a deposit, nothing you will say will make them skip that part.

Know what you want and ask for it
You want this to be done within 3-4 text messages/emails? Give all the information required in the first text message/email. There is absolutely no need for you to send an introduction message that doesn't contain the information the provider might need to book you. Keep your "hey what's good today?" for another day. I know you mean well and you want to make it more personal but a lof of my colleagues will see it as "time wasting" and won't even engage.

Hello so&so,

My name is Mr. X and I would like to know if you're available on [date] for a [duration] session. I would like an [incall/outcall] session. Let me know what information you would need to complete the booking.

Thank you,
X

I would like to book a provider to be my date for an event. Will I have to pay the same rates?
Trips, concerts, restaurant and all that jazz can sometimes be a puzzle. A lot of us have what we call a "social rate" which is lower than our regular rates and allow people to book us for non-intimate events such as but not limited to: business cocktails, concerts, museum dates

If you don't see social rate on a provider's website or ad, ask nicely but do not suggest a price as it is considered rude.

Hello so&so,

I've noticed you don't have social rates, I have this event coming up and I would love for you to be my date. [give as much details as you can so that she can give you a quote] Let me know what information you would need to complete the booking.

Thank you,
X

A few will have a totally different section reserved to travelling, whether you fly her to you or you depart together. If it's not there, once again ask nicely but do not suggest a rate. If you've seen her a few times or if it's something she really wants to do, she might even give you a discount. I know of a friend who really wanted to go to Toqué! so she lowered her dinner date rates but only if you were to take her there.

Can I know what's on your menu?
This question has probably made you lose your chance with a provider. While it's fair to ask what one might offer, there are certainly ways to ask. You could for instance, share what you like or need and ask the provider if that's something they offer.

"Hello so&so,

My name is Mr. X and I would like to know if you're available on [date] for a [duration] session. I would like an [incall/outcall] session. Let me know what information you would need to complete the booking. I am really into deep French kissing and kinkier things like COF. Are those things you offer?

Thank you,
X"

I am married or I have a partner. Discretion is a must for me, how do I play safe?
If you need the provider to be scent & makeup free meaning; no perfume, no scented body lotions, no body oil, no lipstick, no foundation
Let her know ahead, not everyone has fragrance free products so it's good to know a bit in advance in case they might need to find the said products. Same goes for asking her to dress more modestly if you are going to meet in public or if you want her to meet you at your hotel/residence. While none of us walk around with a neon sign that says I AM AN ESCORT, mentioning that you would prefer a more neutral outfit is totally fine.

How do I know she's not going to scam me?
Do your homework. Are the photos legit? Is she only advertising on one website? Is there any reviews? Is she active on twitter? Those are some good questions you can ask yourself before sending money. A reputable provider would not jeopardize her reputation over $50 while she can make more by actually seeing you.

References. I have never seen an independent companion before what do I do?
Some ask for references, some don't. Some will also not provide references. If you used to see someone in an agency and they have an active twitter account, you could ask the provider if they would accept to contact them on there. You should always give the most recent provider you've seen as a reference as many of us think it is strange that you always use the same person as a ref if you've seen 2 other companions after.

Screening: You want my what?
Some escorts will ask you to send a photo of a not expired government issued photo ID to make sure you are who you pretend to be and to make sure you are not a serious criminal. Some may ask for a link to your LinkedIn profile. Maybe they would ask you to send them a private message on a reputable review board. Whatever the screening they might have, you must comply or move on. Arguing over their screening protocol is not going to get you any further. There are many providers that do not require sensitive information from you. Just go with them.



I'd like to bring a gift. Is that ok?
Gifts are never mandatory but always appreciated. I recommend that you either find her wishlist or ask the person directly. You wouldn't want to bring a bottle of wine to someone who's been sober for months or chocolate covered almonds to someone who is deadly allergic so always ask before you bring anything. Twitter can be a good place to find out what a provider might be into or might like.

Confirm and do not cancel last minute
I know some of you have very unpredictable schedules but as much as you can, do not cancel last minute. It's ok to cancel but you have to let them know, don't just ghost them. A lot of us have to book a space to host you and it's not free so when you cancel last minute, you are putting the provider in a very unpleasant position. Apologize and ask if it's possible to re schedule. Some might have a cancellation policy, I recommend you read it thoroughly if you have an uncertain schedule. They will usually send you a message the day before or a few hours before to reconfirm, now would also be a good time to let them know if your plans have changed.

The envelope
An envelope makes it less awkward to hand cash to someone. If you meet in public you might even use a birthday card to hide the money. The provider will most likely excuse themselves to the bathroom to count the money. Is she going to run away with my money? No, not if you've done your homework and made sure she was a reputable provider. If you decide to go with the envelope, It's recommended that you do not seal it as it will be easier for the provider to count the money.


Any other questions or concerns, I'd be happy to help or clarify.

LC

Thanks for putting so much effort into this post. I wasn't aware some may offer a social rate but I may start to ask when contacting someone

Edit:around 5 months since but I think I must be asking about social rates wrong. So far anyone ive asked has not responded.
At this point I'm going to stop looking. Not sure if how I'm asking is off putting I hope at least I'm not asking in a way that makes people uncomfortable