At what point to you tell your SO your an SP?

[Maury Beniowski]

That being said, the majority of guys I know probably could not handle it if their SO was a SP to begin with, and if you find out about it long after the fact it is less likely you could accomodate it.

Until the bling-bling starts to roll in. Then the same majority would learn to handle it real fast...

 

[Ned Flanders]

Until the bling-bling starts to roll in. Then the same majority would learn to handle it real fast...

I am willing to bet that regardless of bling-bling, the majority of guys would not handle it too well for too long.

As well, and this purely speculation on my part, I doubt many busy SPs who put a lot of effort into their job would be capable of putting comparable energy into their private intimate life.
Ned

 

[Up2NoGood]

My limited experience in this is that when your SO does know what you do, they don't like it, but they certainly like the money, the gifts, holidays etc. Until you get into a fight of course, and then all of a sudden your a fucking whore.......Corruptible is to be excluded on the above, as he had no idea.

Having said that, we have come to a compromise ~

We had discussed the idea of setting up a business together of Interactive Porn. That way, I can get out of the industry, and he still gets laid. LOL From a bussiness perspective, we have thought about setting up a web site that offers a rate of say $5.00 for a 20 minute show; hoping that we can make up (pardon the pun) in volume. At the end of the day, I am aware that at $5.99/minute a guy is gonna be really unhappy after he has "finished" 20 minutes of jerking off, and gets a bill for $120.00 Wouldn't it be more feesible to generate volume?

Anyhow, any input would be great

 

[Up2NoGood]

Actually, come to think of it..... who needs a man involved? I can do this on my own. I may have someone to hook me up with a web site, but if anyone is interested, please PM me

Thanks!

 

[noneasgood]

Interesting

This is certainly one of the more interesting topics I've read is quite some time.

As to where I personally stand on the issue I think an SP should tell a perspective SO sooner rather than later. In fact I think the sooner the better, that way if the relationship dies, nobody gets too terribly hurt and if it progresses, the SO is going in with his eyes open.

 

[Up2NoGood]

The relationship IS dead. I am better off doing business ventures on my own. That way, nobody gets hurt. The flip side to that is, alot of men in my life DO know what I do for work and really don't give a rat's ass. At least my options are still open

 

[Smoky]

Exactly sweety, your options are always open

 

[PHNINE]

Okay, I am aware that there have been many posts on this site in regards to this topic. A little 'refresher' advice would be great. I have been an SP for the past couple of years. My question is:.......... at what point do you tell your significant other, that you are a SP? I started to date someone almost a year ago. When we first met, I was not looking for a relationship, and just thought we would hang out and have fun; and maybe some good sex. I got the impression that's all he was looking for as well. Shortly into it, we started to fight ~ weekly. It was at this stage, that I made a conscious effort to NOT tell him. Thinking that the bantering would continue, why bother? As time went on, we started to get along somewhat better, but still had horrific fights. So there I was, sitting on the fence of my decision, I chose to NOT tell him. Why would I? I was only hurting myself. Afterall, he wasn't paying my bills, we weren't living together, not engaged, nor did we share any expenses. Besides the fact that we broke up every other day. As time progressed, the fighting subsided (somewhat) and I started to feel a little more confident with the relationship. Do I tell him NOW? Hell no...... he'll leave me. In the past, I had not felt emotionally secure with him to spill my dirty little secret.

To make a long story short, he now knows everything. I feel completely shitty that I have put another human being through this. The pit in the bottom of my stomach is enough to make me want to vomit every other minute. I don't doubt that the basis of our fights was because I was hiding a dirty little secret. Who knows, I could be wrong. Maybe we were just 2 people that came together and for whatever reason, couldn't get along. Something tells me though, that my lie played a huge roll in the dissolution of our relationship. I suppose staying single is always an option, but if anyone can tell me, at what point you tell your significant other, that you are a hooker, would be wonderful.

Thanks.

Always tell them in the beginning. If they are really into you then they will have to accept it. All the experiences I have had with SP's that I have dated outside of the profession was that I told them that as long as they choose to work I will continue to hobby. If and when they choose to stop then I will stop hobbying. This may speed up your retirement or make it more barable for the guy. And if you can't handle him seeing other women while you are working then you are a hypocrite.

I understand that this profession takes a huge toll on your bodies and minds, and the last thing you want to do is to bottle emotions and experiences up and keep such a huge secret from your SO. You need to talk about it, get things off your chest, digest what is going on in your life, so to speak. So the best thing to do is make it a fact early on, and propose what I do. Now if the guy refuses to hobby or see other women while you work, then I think it is best to find another guy or stay single. Because if it was easy for you to quit for a guy and you didn't need the money then you wouldn't be doing it in the first place. So as long as you are working, nothing should get in your way of making your desired amount and then retiring shortly after.

The biggest peice of advice I give all my SP friends, is to have a goal. Once you hit the goal, and saved what you inteded on saving, get out of the business and don't look back. It is an addicting hobby both for the johns and SP's, and one must be careful not to overload. Hope this helps.

 

[volks]

Can somebody please change the title of this post to "...you're an SP" instead of "...your an SP". I hate it when people fuck up this simple contraction...it means you are, you just take out the "a". For any one who cares, "your" is possessive and makes no sense in this context.

Continually policing the shitty posts,

volks.

 

[JMBrowning]

Always tell them in the beginning. If they are really into you then they will have to accept it. All the experiences I have had with SP's that I have dated outside of the profession was that I told them that as long as they choose to work I will continue to hobby. If and when they choose to stop then I will stop hobbying. This may speed up your retirement or make it more barable for the guy. And if you can't handle him seeing other women while you are working then you are a hypocrite.

I understand that this profession takes a huge toll on your bodies and minds, and the last thing you want to do is to bottle emotions and experiences up and keep such a huge secret from your SO. You need to talk about it, get things off your chest, digest what is going on in your life, so to speak. So the best thing to do is make it a fact early on, and propose what I do. Now if the guy refuses to hobby or see other women while you work, then I think it is best to find another guy or stay single. Because if it was easy for you to quit for a guy and you didn't need the money then you wouldn't be doing it in the first place. So as long as you are working, nothing should get in your way of making your desired amount and then retiring shortly after.

The biggest peice of advice I give all my SP friends, is to have a goal. Once you hit the goal, and saved what you inteded on saving, get out of the business and don't look back. It is an addicting hobby both for the johns and SP's, and one must be careful not to overload. Hope this helps.

Well said. Couldn't agree more.

 

[Up2NoGood]

Always tell them in the beginning. If they are really into you then they will have to accept it. All the experiences I have had with SP's that I have dated outside of the profession was that I told them that as long as they choose to work I will continue to hobby. If and when they choose to stop then I will stop hobbying.

I am not going to discount anything you have said here because I think your advice was great. However, the dynamics of SP's and clients may not be what you think it is. In my experience, men visit working girls for many reasons. Whether it be physical, emotional, or other. The majority (not all) working girls see clients for the money alone. I don't know alot of women who would go through what we do for minimun wage. I could be wrong..... Some girls genuinely like the job, and most of the time I can say that the men are respectful. I would easily agree that my SO could see working girls as long as I was an SP with the understanding that he would have to subject himself to women who are overweight, with bad bread, unshaven, and haven't showered in a week. Then, and ONLY then would him and I be on the same page.

PS: Can someone please show me how to 'quote'? LOL

 

[youngninnocent]

I would easily agree that my SO could see working girls as long as I was an SP with the understanding that he would have to subject himself to women who are overweight, with bad bread, unshaven, and haven't showered in a week. Then, and ONLY then would him and I be on the same page.

Not really, I'm sure there have been a few "cute" guys you've come across (pun intended).

Also you get the money, you don't pay the money.

PS: Can someone please show me how to 'quote'? LOL

hit the quote button on the bottom of the post.

 

[PHNINE]

I am not going to discount anything you have said here because I think your advice was great. However, the dynamics of SP's and clients may not be what you think it is. In my experience, men visit working girls for many reasons. Whether it be physical, emotional, or other. The majority (not all) working girls see clients for the money alone. I don't know alot of women who would go through what we do for minimun wage. I could be wrong..... Some girls genuinely like the job, and most of the time I can say that the men are respectful. I would easily agree that my SO could see working girls as long as I was an SP with the understanding that he would have to subject himself to women who are overweight, with bad bread, unshaven, and haven't showered in a week. Then, and ONLY then would him and I be on the same page.

PS: Can someone please show me how to 'quote'? LOL

I think I kind of understand what you are saying. But I mean the whole point of him seeing SP's while you are still working is not to be on the same page as you are. It is the fact that you are not faithful physically. Perhaps you are faithful mentally, but in terms of sexual activity you are not. Cheating is cheating. It doesn't matter if the guys are old, bald, overweight, unshaven, and not showered. Same goes for the girl, if he sees an SP that is overweight, seen 20 guys in one night, unshaven, and smells it is still seeing an SP. I guess my point isn't about equalling the stage between you and him, but rather having some sort of couping method for the both of you. You are making money, meeting new people, and there must be times where you are having fun. As for him, he gets to see other women while he in his mind has to coupe with the fact that some old dude is banging his girlfriend. And if you can't handle the fact that he is seeing hot women when you have to subject yourself to less attractive men, then I don't know what else to tell you.

But I think emotionally both of you have to pay the price, and sacrifice. Take it from me, cause I have dated many SP's and I know what it is like to be jealous. I know how hard it is on the girls. And no matter how mad, or jealous I get, I always make sure she clears her head with me first by getting everything about the job off her chest. Becuase the emotional damage one can obtain from this profession can be chronic. So I always make sure they are at ease with not only themselves but what they are doing before I go into any sort of relationship rants, or arguments. This is important for every girl working in this porfession. Sometimes they have no one to talk to. You can't tell your parents, you can't tell your friends, all in the fear of being judged. So sometimes you need that guy to talk to. And that guy is your boyfriend.

BTW, If your boyfriend isn't doing this for you, then he really doesn't know anything about women, and you need to find yourself a better man, one who understand. you and the hobby a bit better.

P.S. I am free...LOL J/K

 

[Up2NoGood]

Well as it turns out, I am free too ;-) PM me..... LOL