And 'What If ...' the SP falls for a Pooner?

[funnyfunguy]

It is clear that the goal of finding someone to fall asleep with will have to wait.
Jessica

No need to wait for anyone, Jessica. That is self imprisonment. You were born to be free.

 

[joho]

Hey Jessica, anything is possible in this world. It is sad not to love, but it is much sadder not to be able to love!

 

[InTheBum]

I've had a few SP's fall for me over the years. The most noticeable was an Asian Girl Ah Fung, about 6 to 7 years ago. She let me stay the night for free...but then said she needs the money for her family in a small village in China. She was clearly in love with me, but asked how much money I had in the bank, which I thought was funny. She wanted to know if I could support her, and possible send money to China. I told her, I am a working stiff, that doesn't have much money saved...she had tears in her eyes...then realized, financially, I was a waste of time. She told me to never come see her again...

In total I spent $160 on her and pumped her probably 6 to 7 times, in two sessions, with a total of about 12 hrs spent at her place.


In my opinion, it is quite unlikely for a long-term SP to fall for a client, since they are usually mentally jaded against men. Also, they are working towards a financial goal so they can retire and live a relaxing life, or they have drug issues that they continuously battle...

Short-term SP's are usually just desperate for some quick cash...to help them get ahead in life, financially. Most can't handle man after man, pounding into their pussies...and quickly retire. Short-term SP's are much more likely to fall for a man...after they have time to heal....

 

[Krustee]

The fact remains that many sp's would not consider working in this industry when they are trying to nurture a primary love relationship. So getting into a relationship means the sp needs to give up her whole lifestyle and change everything to be with her new man. A new job, less income and working more hours is not easy to get used to. If he is wealthy enough to support her, this may seem fine to start, but with the power in the relationship totally off-balance will inevitably very likely cause issues.

That may be true for some Nina, however, there are several SP's who are working here in Vancouver who have managed to make a relationship work despite being provider.

I won't name any but I know of at least 3 top providers who are dating & seem to have it together with an SO.

So getting into a relationship means the sp needs to give up her whole lifestyle and change everything to be with her new man. A new job, less income and working more hours is not easy to get used to. If he is wealthy enough to support her, this may seem fine to start, but with the power in the relationship totally off-balance will inevitably very likely cause issues.

I can understand your theory on this Nina but that is not a true reflection of all males in a relationship with an SP.

There should never be concern over who has the power & what you need to do to even the odds.
If that is the case I would simply state that you are with the wrong guy.

Any man worth his salt will be supportive & understanding of his SO regardless of her income or perceived position of power.

Good relationships are not about power & manipulation they are about sharing with & caring for your mate.

I choose to forget about even dreaming of a love interest for myself right now.
I know my heart yearns for it, but I really don't see how it could work for me the way my life is set up... I am looking towards a day when I hang up the heels and meet someone fabulous and live happily ever after..

And ya, I know that's a fairy tale but sometimes they come true too..
xoxo
Nina

Never give up on your dreams Nina that is what makes getting up each morning worth it!

We people are not meant to be alone cuz we are social animals but it is better to be alone than to be in a relationship where you are not appreciated & cared for by your SO.

You will know how much your mate cares by how much they are willing to sacrifice & give of themselves for the relationship.

Unfortunately, those ladies are the exceptions. If the woman has a relationship with a client, she risks him wanting to make it exclusive or him wanting to have her as his financial support. If the woman has a relationship with a man who isn't a client, she always has to deal with the risk of him finding out. I don't believe it to be possible to have a real relationship if you are lying to your partner.

I agree with you here Al & regarding the guys who wish to have their SP GF support them they are scum!
ANY GUY NOT WILLING TO WORK & HELP SUPPORT HIS S.O. IS A WORTHLESS BUM!!!

You gals - if your man is not able to find work after 90 days you should give him the boot!

Any guy who is even half a man will never sit around and let a woman support him.

The majority of men don't handle not being exclusive with a woman well. We just aren't wired to accept having another man having sex with our lady. When a man can handle it, it's usually because he doesn't view her as the prospective mother of his children, rather - he views her as financial support or a plaything that he can break if he wants to. Neither is good for the woman involved.

I tend to agree here again & I have dated 2 SP's in the past.
It really messes with your mind that another guy is with your woman.

That said - if the gal is in the business when you met her & you begin to have feelings for her then you have to accept that it is her choice to stay or go in the biz.

If she decides to quit cuz she cares too much for you then you should discuss it & make sure she will not have regrets & blame you later for having done so.

If the SP SO is gonna quit she has to do it for the right reasons.

I personally would tell an SP if she was my SO that she needs to finish her goals that she started out with & then quit or she may, even if just in the back of her mind, blame me if the relationship starts to get rocky.
Alternatively - said SP could begin to miss the money & lifestyle & that could cause a rift in the relationship.

It has to be her decision & hers alone whether to stay or go.

Yes Nina, Fairy tales sometimes do come true. I will keep looking to the stars for inspiration of just that. What you say makes sense, the way our lives are set up, it's likely not possible to maintain any sort of healthy relationship while in the industry.

Dreams do come true but most likely there will need to be a little compromise to the details & extent of how much of those dreams become reality.

Dreams are dreams & there will always be that separation with reality to differentiate the two.

But for those who live a little more in the real world than in La La land and are willing to put forth the effort to make those dreams a reality ...
YES you just may be your own lucky charm.

In my own life I have had dreams & made them come true but only the rational ones.

For example;
I have the motorcycle I always dreamed of.
I have one of the cars I always dreamed of.
I am still not able to get my 'dream' home nor my other dream car:
http://www.larevueautomobile.com/images/Ferrari/California/Exterieur/Ferrari_California_001.jpg
http://www.larevueautomobile.com/images/Ferrari/California/Exterieur/Ferrari_California_002.jpg
http://www.larevueautomobile.com/images/Ferrari/California/Exterieur/Ferrari_California_003.jpg

But I do plan on having it within the next 5-7 years!

The dream home may take longer?

Those are just things of course but having the love of my life will trump all the other 'things'.

Of course, having entered this industry at the age of 41, with experiences of unhealthy relationships when I was a secretary, a cashier, a manager, a trainer ...well, maybe relationships can't give us what we yearn for no matter what we do or who we are.

So, you're no spring chicken!

You have had several past jobs & relationships along the way.
All that adds up to experience & the best thing about experience is what you learned from it.

If all that experience has not taught you anything other than fear & hopelessness I would say you need to change your attitude & perspective on life.

Not that I am a shining example of who or what to be but at least I do know the value of experience.

I guess in a tiny place in my mind I thought it would be somewhat easier to be around a guy if he was a client who continued to see other SP's. I thought that because at least then we would share a very important understanding of human needs at a level not all understand and I thought that would somehow make it possible to work out. I know I was wrong.

This just sounds odd Jessica?
There is a bit of difference in the activities here.

You, being an SP, are earning an income from seeing other men.

What income of benefit is your man getting from seeing other SP's if he is dating you?

If you have a open, no strings attached relationship then that is understandable but I assume it wasn't.

I am a very tolerant person with few needs., so easily and simply satisfied and equally, let down only when someone lies to me. Truly all I am looking for is someone with whom I can be honest and in return who will be honest with me.

And so I wait. I am working within a detailed time frame to attain my goals. It is clear that the goal of finding someone to fall asleep with will have to wait.

Thanks for the input and thanks for the honesty.
Jessica

Damn - you really sound despondent here!

Cheer up Ducky!
You may as well learn to laugh at your problems -
everybody else does!

from a card I once received

Honesty in a relationship is paramount in my opinion but there are exceptions like when she asks if she looks fat in her new skin tight jeans & if you like her new purple hair.

Also I would suspect that there is a bit more than honesty you are looking for in a relationship.

Here's a bit of helpful advice FWIW - spend time with friends more & focus on your goals.

Begin a fitness program if not already in one.

Pick up a hobby - like say ....
pooning?

or

take some college courses like advanced calculus or Boolean algebra?

If that doesn't work come to Vancouver & I can think of several activities to keep your mind off of searching for a mate.

Do you enjoy being tied up?
What is your tolerance for pain?
Do you mind having hand prints on your bum from being spanked?
Ever been covered in gravy &then thrown in a room full of puppies?

I also have a pony if .... er never mind.

 

[jackperb]

That may be true for some Nina, however, there are several SP's who are working here in Vancouver who have managed to make a relationship work despite being provider.
I won't name any but I know of at least 3 top providers who are dating & seem to have it together with an SO.

I can understand your theory on this Nina but that is not a true reflection of all males in a relationship with an SP.
There should never be concern over who has the power & what you need to do to even the odds.
If that is the case I would simply state that you are with the wrong guy.
Any man worth his salt will be supportive & understanding of his SO regardless of her income or perceived position of power.
Good relationships are not about power & manipulation they are about sharing with & caring for your mate.
You will know how much your mate cares by how much they are willing to sacrifice & give of themselves for the relationship.

All good points Krustee. I especially liked your comments about power positions.
I think sometimes it's too easy to get caught up in the "what if" disaster scenarios and talk ourselves out of taking a chance on something that could bring us great happiness. Sure, there may be some challenges particular to this kind of relationship, but no relationship is without challenges and I believe there is also great potential for a richly rewarding relationship for both parties as much as for any "civilians".
I'm interested to see what Jessica thinks of the recent comments in support of the idea.

 

[FunSugarDaddy]

e) None of the above?

There is a time for eros and a time for Euros. The smart SP continues to run her business until there is not a question in her mind. Then she remembers the examples of the women who have crossed the line and had "relationships" with pooners. Like the pooner who started threads on every board slamming his SP girlfriend when she kicked the wantabe pimp out. Like the pooner who started threads on every board slamming the SPs who wouldn't be his "girlfriends". Like the pooner who told the SP's mother and sister that she was an SP the first time he met them, that was when she realized that HE was the reason all of her friends had jumped ship on her.

What I'm trying to say, is it seldom turns out well to have a relationship with a pooner/client.

That is why every SP should have an exit plan and know where she is going to move to when she hangs up her stilettos.

Haven't read the thread, but this is definately the right answer. Good post!

 

[jackperb]

I absolutley agree with everything you stated on this Krustee and especially these comments.

One should never be in a relationship based on materialism only. Thats all fin a dandy at first but never lasts. Usually ends up in heartache.

I know many people that are in marriages who make average incomes and who are very happy together. They dont take materialism over caring, sharing, supporting each other and love which is what a REAL relationship should be about and based on and NOT WHAT ONES DOES FOR A LIVING.

Our society sometimes eh??

Its soul to soul that counts.

Very well said. What is sad is that so many people don't realize this until they are stuck in a soulless marriage, surrounded by the "stuff" they wanted but with a spouse who places them somewhere below the car or boat on the priority list.

 

[jackperb]

Haven't read the thread, but this is definately the right answer. Good post!

FSD, you might want to read the rest of the thread. There are some alternate points of view well expressed in the later part of the thread.

 

[jackperb]

remember one thing.. love only improves you, whether or not you are receiving it.
(you owe it to yourself, and the people that love you, those you've made a promise to be there for, or those who have chosen to make sacrifices and gone out of their way to support you, never to put someone else in charge of maintaining your self worth)

love does not wreck the wearer, so the stuff that feels like its eating you is jealousy, insecurity, fear, loneliness, pride, and vanity to name a few.. if its feeling unbalanced, a person that really loves you will respond positively when you do things that are good for you, a person that is in it for themselves will start showing their true colours as soon as they realize they aren't your first priority any more, at which point you'll be emotionally freed up to tell them to take a hike.

To me, what is even sadder is when a person gives and gives and gives to a relationship, only to finally realize that their "partner" has either used them for some selfish purpose or simply doesn't value them as highly as some thing.

 

[jackperb]

You can't plan when you fall for someone though, can you... lol

My best wishes to everyone out there who's falling in love. it is truly what the world needs more of.

I guess that's really where the rubber (and I do mean RUBBER, not latex) hits the road. Sometimes no matter what the intentions, something "clicks" and we fall in love. Then the question becomes, embrace it with all the potential for happiness and heartache, or spurn it and be safe from possible unhappiness. For me, I'd rather live as full a life as I can and if that means taking a chance on both happiness and heartache, I'd rather take the chance than hide in my shell and miss really living.

 

[vidwindow]

Jessica,

I've followed you here on the boards and you seem like a genuine person. Whomever it is that captured your heart is blessed with an extraordinary opportunity.
I think your trepidation ( and for many on this board) lies within your definition of relationship. For instance, if you try to define "family" you find it does not rely upon rules, or numbers, or gender. Families exist in the relationships and love that endear us to each other. Some may seem as dysfunctional as hell while others seem "normal"; either way they are what they are. So change your definition. If the two of you love and respect each other truly, you will create a relationship that works.
The past experiences of others will not predict the outcome of your future. Just because the path is well traveled does not mean every step has been taken.
Good luck!

Vid

 

[Krustee]

You did neglect to mention one thing in your post. What happens when you get old? I'm not talking about 40, I'm talking about hitting 50 or higher. Yes, there are women that still work at that age but they are few and far between....the number of younger SP's outnumber them exponentially. Once you're in your mid 40s and up you face the challenge of starting a career. It's one thing for a careerist to change careers, it's another to start off fresh in the civilian world. It's not much different than a homemaker wife going thru a divorce at 50 and realizing "holy fucking shit, now what". I know this because I personally know two women who are dealing with this (divorced in their 50s with no skills).

If a woman is thinking of getting out, do it while you're younger or at least set up a business on the side you can move into when you leave this trade. Otherwise, the future may well get ugly.

dood if you want Nina's quote to look proper

put this before:
[ QUOTE=Sexy Nina Leone;1034161]
Just delete the space between the bracket & the Q

& this after:[/QUOTE]

 

[August West]

Risks in life are always there are they not? Do we stop feeling and trying because we are afraid of the potential for failure based on others results?
Is it really the wisest choice to fold our hand in a game we have yet to even begin playing because the majority before us fell victim to higher odds?

You need to make those decisions for yourself, do you wish to live a life where you shut out feelings and potential because of fear and/or failure? I wouldn't want to live a life like that.

"Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?"
~ Frank Scully

"Leap and the net will appear."
~ Zen Saying

 

[Krustee]

"Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?"
~ Frank Scully

"Leap and the net will appear."
~ Zen Saying

Famous Last words:
"Oh SHIT!!!"
~ dead guy who went out on a limb & took a leap

 

[HubbaHubba]

. It is clear that the goal of finding someone to fall asleep with will have to wait.

That's easy to solve. Just have sex with HB40, you'll be asleep in no time

 

[LittleAsianGuy]

If she spent the evening with honda671 where they watched his old tvb cantonese(chinese movies all night ) she'll fall asleep very quick

That's easy to solve. Just have sex with HB40, you'll be asleep in no time

 

[jackperb]

Hey everyone ...wow.
Does anyone at all wish to believe the Bunny is Speechless? ...didn't think so!
Truthfully, I'm touched and astounded yet again that so many caring individuals take time to reply to someone they've never met. It's my honour to be sharing words here with you. Thank you.

I think I shall indulge in enjoying the cherry on top without delving too much into the dessert itself. Can't get into trouble for just pilfering the cherry ...can I?

Jessica, I think you got such a response because it's something that touches some of us in one way or the other. Cupid is such a funny little twerp, skewering us with his arrows when we least expect it and in completely unexpected ways.

 

[Krustee]

"Romance, like the rabbit at the dog track, is the elusive, fake, and never attained reward which, for the benefit and amusement of our masters, keeps us running and thinking in safe circles"

I wonder .... ??
Does she realize how increadibly profound the above statement is?

Oh, uh, that quote comes from - Beverly Jones.


What about this little missive?

"Romance should never begin with sentiment. It should begin with science and end with a settlement."
- - Oscar Wilde


or this?

"Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter."
- - Anonymous

 

[Krustee]

Having huge orgasms always helps me sleep

That would preclude having sex with HB40 then.

 

[Guardian Angel]

Having been married for over 30 years, I can say love was strong for many of those years, the memories of the times together, family and friends met over the years still are part of my life. Would I avoid a relationship because I was afraid it wouldn't work out or last forever - NO!

Jessica, I say go with your heart, make the effort any realtionship requires and enjoy it for as long as you can. Perhaps you will find someone in your life that will provide exceptional happiness, fulfillment and companionship.

Good luck!

G.A.