a matter of style

[sevenofnine]

i have been in this a couple years now,
i have had sessions,
slow romantic, intimate, amazingly simple and beautiful,
where i have stood and looked at the stars on leaving the ladies apartment, and thought i have found the answer to the mystery of life.

i have had sessions,
where we have pretty much ripped our clothes off as soon as the door was closed and went for as many shots on goal as i could muster,
and i have left there with a smile plastered on my face for a week,
and didn't give a shit about the mystery of life.

but never with the same lady,

so my question is it possible,


first of all,
i have to say most of the blame is mine,

i pretty much, am only comfortable as long as the lady is comfortable.
its not a question of menue or services or her voice, telling me its ok,

if the lady is sending me facial or body lanquage signals that she is not comfortable. then im not comfortable. end of story.
i have been with ladies who specialize in a slow romantic style and i have asked them or suggested to them lets just go for it,
they have said ok, but there face and body lanquage tells me, thats not what there about at all. and well its end of story,

i also am seeing a lady where that is very much her style.
i would ask her to meet me at the door naked so we can do it in her hall way,
but she usually only wears something very sexy anyway, like a panty and bra set, so it is kindof pointless, and we stand in her door way along time, i get the feeling we could do it in her entrance hallway, without any problem, but we usually wait until were upstairs, and have clinked our glasses.
but just the same this lady doesn't push all my buttons in such a way, that i want a slow romantic experiance with her, i don't think she could slow down. to be honest with you,


and part of the problem is again mine, i choose to see a lady based on her online presense, her personality, something there has to speak to me draw me in,

it has nothing to do with menue or age or looks, some ladies just seem very interesting to me,, and i would very much like to meet them,
for coffee or sex it doesn't matter,
so i don't necessary pick a lady by what i think she can do for me in bed.

again, another problem i have is i usually set up a date, a week ahead, with no thought to what mood im in what service i want,
usually with a girl that allready knows me.

sometimes i just want company, a drink some conversation, a warm body next to mine, and i know one thing will lead to another,
and i usaully book a couple hours mininmum sometimes more, so im not worried about time,

other times i just want the sex.
and we will talk latter, or talk through out.

but i haven't found a lady that can deliver both styles. or is comfortable delivering both styles.

am i asking to much from one lady,
and im usually a regular.
so im not asking a lady who has never met me, to rip our clothes off, and go for it as soon as the door closes.

 

[[Server Error]]

If a lady cannot comfortably deliver the two styles you desire, if I were you, I would try broadening the horizon and seek out another lady who can do one or the other (or even both!). None or very few people are good at everything. It is hard enough to find someone who specializes in one thing or two. It is probably a time-consuming process to research and connect with a new lady, but it is probably a better investment than to spend time waiting and hoping that the lady will some day decide to deliver the style she is not comfortable with. You can always return to her when she does

 

[blazejowski]

I love your poem, 7of9.

I honestly don't have the attention span to go through that...

 

[Katlyn]

Hey this is a good question...

It is indeed partly the client and also partly the SP. I have clients whom I am slow and romantic with, and others that it is like we are old lovers, and others still that it is just fun play time. But when we try to change it up, it just doesn't work because the original session "mood" tends to be the one that came most naturally between us so it is awkward to do other things.

But don't forget that you are not seeing an SP the same way you would a girlfriend. With a girlfriend you can explore those other ways because there is no pressure. There is no time limit, no thinking that you've paid and the girl is also not worrying about making sure she does everything right and gives good service.

I'm sure you could have a variety of sessions with a lady if you stuck with her and worked through all the awkward times. If she had a chance to REALLY know you were enjoying yourself even if it is awkward and would be coming back no matter what then she may be able to not worry as much about the service she is giving and instead try to be part of the moment a bit more. Not to say ladies do not try to be part of the moment (I speak for myself here but I am certain many would agree), this is our business -- a service business -- and you are our customers; we want to provide good service because it is important in so many ways that we do so it is hard to just be part of the moment without thinking about providing good service.

One more thing I'd like to add is that I am certain there are ladies who can flip between moods with the same client. For instance, a lady who has been working for a few years is probably going to be better at this as she's learned how to step outside of her own mood and feelings that day and just go to work. Also, I can do this BUT I need to know in advance. I have clients that book romantic candlelit non-fs appointments and then the next time, when they book the appointment, they tell me some fantasy they've always had and we do that. It's not a problem...but I have not yet learned how to switch on command and I get into a certain mind-set preparing for an appointment, so if you were seeing me you might think this was impossible with me too. On the day of, with several hours notice, if you know you will be feeling more soft or more randy than your session with that SP usually is, maybe let her know and see if that helps.