A good read about the SP/Date relationship...
- Thread starter NoSoundRain
- Start date
I have to say it is pretty much what i look for and in some ways what I have with the girls I have meet and stay in touch with .. No.I don't make a million a yr and i don't pay 500 an hour all though If I know then I do things for them , hang out, pay bills and buy stuff that has noting to do with seeing them on the clock .. Now I also don't know any 5000 a day ladies either . \How many of us do?
As for the tone .. .to snotty .. and why do they all ways have to talk about the rich guys and the upper end escorts .. or the low end girls /How about the average guy ..Not sure if we are average ...but .... and the average escort or even the girl that does it part time ,they are actually the majority of who is involved in the business .. and at the same time they are are also the girls that want to catch a husband and settle down.. A house some kids and a dog .. And that is why we see escorts .. be cause either you got that and need a break ,, you had that and won't be going there any more or you don't know but this works until we decide ,
As for the tone .. .to snotty .. and why do they all ways have to talk about the rich guys and the upper end escorts .. or the low end girls /How about the average guy ..Not sure if we are average ...but .... and the average escort or even the girl that does it part time ,they are actually the majority of who is involved in the business .. and at the same time they are are also the girls that want to catch a husband and settle down.. A house some kids and a dog .. And that is why we see escorts .. be cause either you got that and need a break ,, you had that and won't be going there any more or you don't know but this works until we decide ,
some people still don't have a 21st century perspective on the adult services industry
I found one of the comments on this article so interesting. Iveta wrote that men are conceited and selfish if they want to hire a companion to come and go at their whim, and to do things exactly as they want. She judges them for not wanting to deal with the down-sides of being in a relationship.
However, I completely disagree with her assessment of the situation. I don't think it's being selfish or conceited or spoiled to hire a companion.
I view it more like this: Hiring a companion is like going out to a restaurant. Getting involved in a relationship is like making a meal.
Both are great, for different reasons. It just depends on what you want at that time (or maybe you want both, and pursue both).
When you visit a companion, she meets you at the time that works for you. She leaves when you want her to leave. She dresses the way you ask her to dress. You can seek out someone who has the same interests or educational background as you, so that you can have interesting conversations. You can select a lady who has a body type that's appealing to you. You don't have to do any of the work that goes into a building a relationship. You just need to show up, be respectful, and pay.
This is very much like going to a restaurant. You can choose the location that works best for you. You can reserve a table for the time you want. You can choose the cuisine that you feel like having that night. You don't have to do any of the work that goes into creating that meal. You just need to show up, be respectful, and pay.
On the other hand, building a relationship takes work. It takes compromise, patience, and skill. It can be rewarding in ways that seeing a companion might not be. You can wake up together morning after morning. There are no time constraints. You can get to know each others families and build a life together. You'll have Christmas and Valentine's Day, and anniversaries. You'll also have fights, and stresses, and difficulties. But you may find it to a rewarding, enriching experience.
This is more like making a meal than going to a restaurant. You can grow the tomatoes and take care of the plants for months, then put them in your salad. You might cut yourself while you're chopping something up. You may overcook the chicken or you might cook the best tasting chicken you've ever had. At the end of the day, this is something you chose to do, you worked to make it happen, and hopefully, it's a rewarding experience that was worth your time and effort.
I don't think that going to a restaurant is better or worse than making a meal. They are just different experiences to meet different needs.
I think it's the same thing when it comes to comparing hiring a companion versus building a relationship.
However, I completely disagree with her assessment of the situation. I don't think it's being selfish or conceited or spoiled to hire a companion.
I view it more like this: Hiring a companion is like going out to a restaurant. Getting involved in a relationship is like making a meal.
Both are great, for different reasons. It just depends on what you want at that time (or maybe you want both, and pursue both).
When you visit a companion, she meets you at the time that works for you. She leaves when you want her to leave. She dresses the way you ask her to dress. You can seek out someone who has the same interests or educational background as you, so that you can have interesting conversations. You can select a lady who has a body type that's appealing to you. You don't have to do any of the work that goes into a building a relationship. You just need to show up, be respectful, and pay.
This is very much like going to a restaurant. You can choose the location that works best for you. You can reserve a table for the time you want. You can choose the cuisine that you feel like having that night. You don't have to do any of the work that goes into creating that meal. You just need to show up, be respectful, and pay.
On the other hand, building a relationship takes work. It takes compromise, patience, and skill. It can be rewarding in ways that seeing a companion might not be. You can wake up together morning after morning. There are no time constraints. You can get to know each others families and build a life together. You'll have Christmas and Valentine's Day, and anniversaries. You'll also have fights, and stresses, and difficulties. But you may find it to a rewarding, enriching experience.
This is more like making a meal than going to a restaurant. You can grow the tomatoes and take care of the plants for months, then put them in your salad. You might cut yourself while you're chopping something up. You may overcook the chicken or you might cook the best tasting chicken you've ever had. At the end of the day, this is something you chose to do, you worked to make it happen, and hopefully, it's a rewarding experience that was worth your time and effort.
I don't think that going to a restaurant is better or worse than making a meal. They are just different experiences to meet different needs.
I think it's the same thing when it comes to comparing hiring a companion versus building a relationship.
Lol.. I was about to write the same thing Holly.. I looked over my shoulder when I read your post in case you were spying on me..
jinx.. !!!!
Well put and a great analogy... the sum of the parts that make our lives complete are only known to us and to assume otherwise or assume what is right for you is right for another is foolish.
NoSound.
jinx.. !!!!
Well put and a great analogy... the sum of the parts that make our lives complete are only known to us and to assume otherwise or assume what is right for you is right for another is foolish.
NoSound.
This article bears a very, very small resemblance to reality as 99.99999% of us know it. This part made me laugh out loud:
Katelyn is sensuous, elegant and smart. Men buy her La Perla lingerie and leave her money in envelopes on coffee tables, and she knows how to dress a roast and when to listen.
When Katelyn is not working, she is working out and reading and dining out with friends and going to London for the weekend and Paris for the week. She is practicing yoga and bettering her body and her mind and advancing her entire being so that she will continue to appreciate in value, in a world where youth is prized over experience, and in a city where women will sleep with men for less than Katelyn makes in a minute.
At a real magazine this would get the writer and her editor fired. However, the NY Observer is an aspirational rag for bridge and tunnel guys who think they are money just like "Jack" and girls who wish they could be as hot as "Katelyn" and be whisked off to the Hamptons for a swim and ribeyes with Wall Street financiers. It's a fantasy where everyone is gorgeous and happy and hang out at the Waldorf and the W and the sex is wonderful.
The next article is about people complaining that their 5 storey Manhattan townhouses are too big and they haven't been in their library in months. Give me peace!
I'm not saying that there aren't young and wealty men who visit escorts (I do
) and that there aren't some escorts who make lots of money and have lavish gifts showered on them. But there aren't many and this article makes it sound like they are living like J Lo rather than working in the sex trade.
Katelyn is sensuous, elegant and smart. Men buy her La Perla lingerie and leave her money in envelopes on coffee tables, and she knows how to dress a roast and when to listen.
When Katelyn is not working, she is working out and reading and dining out with friends and going to London for the weekend and Paris for the week. She is practicing yoga and bettering her body and her mind and advancing her entire being so that she will continue to appreciate in value, in a world where youth is prized over experience, and in a city where women will sleep with men for less than Katelyn makes in a minute.
At a real magazine this would get the writer and her editor fired. However, the NY Observer is an aspirational rag for bridge and tunnel guys who think they are money just like "Jack" and girls who wish they could be as hot as "Katelyn" and be whisked off to the Hamptons for a swim and ribeyes with Wall Street financiers. It's a fantasy where everyone is gorgeous and happy and hang out at the Waldorf and the W and the sex is wonderful.
The next article is about people complaining that their 5 storey Manhattan townhouses are too big and they haven't been in their library in months. Give me peace!
I'm not saying that there aren't young and wealty men who visit escorts (I do
) and that there aren't some escorts who make lots of money and have lavish gifts showered on them. But there aren't many and this article makes it sound like they are living like J Lo rather than working in the sex trade.
Holly,
I'm not going to quote your comment as the above poster just did (no need to be redundant) but you've nailed it beautifully.
Perfect analogy.
I've made lots of meals and at the time it was the way for me but in the past 10 years after my divorce and as a single parent I've chosen to eat in restaurants. It's just easier.
That's not to say that I won't one day start to amke my own meals again.
Cheers
I'm not going to quote your comment as the above poster just did (no need to be redundant) but you've nailed it beautifully.
Perfect analogy.
I've made lots of meals and at the time it was the way for me but in the past 10 years after my divorce and as a single parent I've chosen to eat in restaurants. It's just easier.
That's not to say that I won't one day start to amke my own meals again.
Cheers
Depends on whether you have much backbone as a man, as far as I'm concerned.
If you have no backbone, then the experiences of a temporary girlfriend - who is there for your every whim and you only see the good sides of a relationship - will spoil you and you won't be able to stand a real girlfriend because she is going to come with disadvantages and possible complications. She will have her own tastes, her own goals, and is not there for your every whim. She may even have competing interests from yours.
If you have a backbone, you will appreciate the lightness and fun of a temporary girlfriend, and you will never think of it more than that unless you make the grave consideration that such a person - if they became a real girlfriend - will add dimensions to the relationship which you must be prepared for. That is why, in my opinion, guys who are sugar daddies that attempt to make their sugar babe fall in love with them, are usually fools because wealth has prevented them from using their backbone and consider anything as seriously as it needs to be. She too will have to come down from being a sugar babe - having money thrown at her without consideration for its long term consequences that a real relationship will require.
Honestly i have not seen any escorts that don't come with complications , .. If you get to know them like many of the guys and girls in that story.. then you see there good , bad and ugly.. it is human nature .. The writer is too far removed from the reality of the story.. and is using it just as a vehicle to push there agenda and judgements like all way ..
I don't see it as simple.. when you hang they are girl friends .. just not "the girl friend" When you pay them for there time , which usually includes sex but not all way ,, then you can see it in any number of way depending on how friendly you are .. I look at as helping out .. because |i know they have to make an income some way .. i am just supplying them with one at the moment.. If they hire me .. to drive or do some ting else that is one of my skills then they are supplying me with an income ..
It just is not that strait foreward fore me .. that I am seeing an escort .. and i don't think it is with many of us older guys .
I don't see it as simple.. when you hang they are girl friends .. just not "the girl friend" When you pay them for there time , which usually includes sex but not all way ,, then you can see it in any number of way depending on how friendly you are .. I look at as helping out .. because |i know they have to make an income some way .. i am just supplying them with one at the moment.. If they hire me .. to drive or do some ting else that is one of my skills then they are supplying me with an income ..
It just is not that strait foreward fore me .. that I am seeing an escort .. and i don't think it is with many of us older guys .
Brilliant comment from Holly
Just read the "Luxury Rental Girlfriend." The article seems to want to address the question, "Why do even highly desirable men hire escorts rather than go for freebies they're eagerly offered from civvies?"
But the answer given consists mostly of worldly-wise anecdotes rather than real insight. Guys like Jack—who allegedly "can have any girl he wants"—come across as letting themselves be fleeced by high-end SPs because they're morbidly obsessed with evading the clinginess of a real GF.
This article seems narrow in its focus on a subculture of lawyers or execs who spend $50 000 a year for "25 girls." Good for them—but why make sweeping generalizations about "men" in general?
Why such silly overgeneralizations like, "Men want to be loving. They want the GFE without the LTR..." It's the type of Cosmo-style bluster without real substance that someone steeped in this kind of journalism can dash off half asleep.
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But I find Holly Taylor's contribution to this thread absolutely brilliant. She's right that for most men, hiring SPs isn't a substitute for a long-term relationship, but more like going out to a restaurant vs. eating home-cooked meals.
Most people ideally want both, and the reality of most pooners is that they seek erotic variety while, at the same time, also craving an SO's affection and intimacy.
But here most men run into the vexing problem of traditional relationship expectations. Most women serve up pretty much the same "home-cooked meal" all the time—and yet expect them never to "eat out."
So most men with SOs seek out SPs on the sly, rather than honestly explaining to their SO why they'd like to poon.
Just read the "Luxury Rental Girlfriend." The article seems to want to address the question, "Why do even highly desirable men hire escorts rather than go for freebies they're eagerly offered from civvies?"
But the answer given consists mostly of worldly-wise anecdotes rather than real insight. Guys like Jack—who allegedly "can have any girl he wants"—come across as letting themselves be fleeced by high-end SPs because they're morbidly obsessed with evading the clinginess of a real GF.
This article seems narrow in its focus on a subculture of lawyers or execs who spend $50 000 a year for "25 girls." Good for them—but why make sweeping generalizations about "men" in general?
Why such silly overgeneralizations like, "Men want to be loving. They want the GFE without the LTR..." It's the type of Cosmo-style bluster without real substance that someone steeped in this kind of journalism can dash off half asleep.
---
But I find Holly Taylor's contribution to this thread absolutely brilliant. She's right that for most men, hiring SPs isn't a substitute for a long-term relationship, but more like going out to a restaurant vs. eating home-cooked meals.
Most people ideally want both, and the reality of most pooners is that they seek erotic variety while, at the same time, also craving an SO's affection and intimacy.
But here most men run into the vexing problem of traditional relationship expectations. Most women serve up pretty much the same "home-cooked meal" all the time—and yet expect them never to "eat out."
So most men with SOs seek out SPs on the sly, rather than honestly explaining to their SO why they'd like to poon.
