1)Yes this was our first time having sex. I could barely get the head of my penis in, she said it was painful and i couldn't feel anything.
2) Usually its the smaller girls and girls im having sex with the first time
3)With sex workers it doesn't occur. Just happens with a girl i met for the first time. Usually the reason why we end the realtionship, because it doesn't fit and its painful for her
Would u think lube would help and what we u suggest? Thank you
Hi Smokedog
Pain during intercourse can be common with women. Pain when first entering the vagina is the most common type of pain when woman report it. It can certainly be very frustrating for the relationship.
There can be many factors that are affecting this and unless we were able to speak with you and your partner we do not know exactly what to advise, but what I can do is give you some general suggestions.
Penis size may not be the problem. Painful penetration can happen for men with average sized penises. (The average erect penis size is 5 to 6 inches long).
Communicating before and during sex will be very important. For sex to be comfortable for the woman she needs to be aroused and lubricated. Every woman is different and some woman can be very aroused but the vagina will still be dry. In this situation lube works great.
Also communicate with her about what feels good and what doesn't. You may also need to do more foreplay, sensual touching until she is aroused. Ask her what would make sex more comfortable. Supporting her can go along way as it could be easy for her to think it is her problem. This could make the situation worse as it would probably effect her arousal. The vagina can tighten up if the woman is tense, anxious or stressed, making her feel relaxed is important.
Trying different positions can also work. Also go with the flow, if you start penetration and it is painful for her you could always just go to oral sex or masturbating her. There are many different ways to have sex and hopefully as people become more comfortable and relaxed it will help with the vaginal penetration.
If after this the problem still continues I would suggest that she visits her doctor and get a medical check up. There are certain medical conditions that can make sex painful. Again I am unsure about what her medical history and sexual history are. For example has she been able to have sex in the past or is this her first time.
To summarize I would suggest communicating on what feels good, lots of support, foreplay and lube.
Just make sure that you use a water based lubricant, silicon lubricants also work well to keep things slippery.
If this still continues to be a problem for you just let me know and I can send you some details of people you could see. You can always send me a pm about this.
HN
www.healthnurse.wordpress.com
www.stiresource.com
