Deciphering Craigslist Erotic Ads

[trackstar]

I'm a Slut: But you still have to pay for it
YMMV: Unless I find you attractive, you get as little as possible
I'm Wet and Horny: My rent is due
Vancouver's Best Kept Secret: I just moved here from Surrey
Surrey's Best Kept Secret: I just moved here from Vancouver
I Give You Best Happy Service: I work at a micro
Able to Please On My Knees: I have been banned from PERB and Surrey
Former Model: I posted my pic on the internet before
Oral Is My Specialty: I overcharge for a bj
Specials, Today Only: And tomorrow and the next day and the next day...
Specials: My regular rate
Mature: Old as fuck (yet still younger than BJHunter ).
I Am a 27 Year Old: I am a 39 year old
True Picture: From 10 years ago
BBBJ: 90% with my hands and don't come in my mouth
Pictures Say 1000 Words: But none of them are good
A True Beauty: In the eyes of my near-sighted mother
Loves To Be Pleased: You can lick my pussy and I'll pretend to enjoy it
Upscale Condo: I live in a highrise
Duos Available: There are 2 of us here to rip you off
Natural 38DD's: 40 waist, 48 hips

 

[Valium]

Exclusive: Pay more for less service
Pornstar: I used to suck cock for free, now i get paid for it
100% real picture: of someone else
100% real Japanese: Korean girl who speaks Japanese
First day working: of this week
College girl: College dropout
Young student: High school dropout
Very clean room: Everything else sucks
No disappointments: If you are disappointed we don't care, we'll still take your money
New low price: Now offering limited service, if you want the same service pay the old price

 

[Harmony-bc]

Those were funny, and probably a little true!

 

[Quarter Mile'r]

More like..........

Deciphering ANY sp's ads cuz you really never get what you pay
for do you? Well almost never.




..................QM'r

 

[Cock Throppled]

Hot Buddy - My friend (who isn't here) looks better than me.

 

[Kevin101]

LOL!

Special rate... so true.
I'm Wet and Horny: My rent is due -
I'm a Slut: But you still have to pay for it- LMFAO
Specials, Today Only: And tomorrow and the next day and the next day- so true lol


LOL. There funny cause its true.

 

[Up_My_Kilt]

all so true ...

you left out: Have Reviews-- look quick cause the shill is gonna get deleted!

 

[FortunateOne]

Loved all those.

Also love

Non-pro: Number search reveals an agency
Independent: Most recently being used by the micro girls
Barely legal: probably isn't
Last chance before I retire: what can I say

 

[teejay69]

no emails and no text messages: Papasan or Mamasan takes all the calls. My English is not good.
no emails and no text messages (Hot Girl from K Micro managed by Maya): Too late - SandiShi already booked your time.
Limited Availability: Better book now before my friend comes for her monthly visit.

 

[trackstar]

Those were funny, and probably a little true!

I figured it was a good start