asking out a girl!
- Thread starter magicmystery
- Start date
Q. Hi there - here's some flowers - wanna fuck?
A. Not till I met you, you smooth talkin son of a bitch
Seriously tho - it's fun to send flowers with no note and no agenda besides just to make someones day.
As for asking ladies out and risking rejection, that's like getting punched in the face. After a few hits, it's not so scary but it does require sticking your chin out.
#1 rule
Don't ask someone out for coffee, ask her out for drinks
If she's remotely attracted to you, she'll be interested, if not, at least she didn't say yes as a pity date (because a coffee date is nothing)
If you want to practice on "game" and flirting chat, try online like plenty of fish/lavalife, get them onto some msn and chat there. It will give you some time (typing) to get used to whitty responses, and when you move onto real conversations one on one, whit and flirting will be second nature
Don't ask someone out for coffee, ask her out for drinks
If she's remotely attracted to you, she'll be interested, if not, at least she didn't say yes as a pity date (because a coffee date is nothing)
If you want to practice on "game" and flirting chat, try online like plenty of fish/lavalife, get them onto some msn and chat there. It will give you some time (typing) to get used to whitty responses, and when you move onto real conversations one on one, whit and flirting will be second nature
Thanks. Well, I've had plenty of cyber-practice (geeks can be wittiest people in cyberworld, real-world is a different thing altogether).
I haven't had a chance to go back to her office yet to get the paperwork done but I'd be going there soon. I am thinking I'd ask her coffee/drinks and if she refuses, I'd cry like hell. lol. If she refuses, I'd figure out a way to overcome her first excuse. If she still refuses, well, 'have a pleasant evening and thanks for all your help with my paperwork'
I was suppose to go to her office today but I chickened out thinking I was not going to be able to ask her out. So, I called and rescheduled my appointment. Another day to put some courage into me. I don't really fear rejection as such, it's just that this is the only chance I'd have. If she refuses, I basically won't get to ask her out some other time because I won't be going back to her office for any reason.
But then again, if I don't ask her out at all, I have zero chance. If I ask her out, she refuses, I've no other chance. So, I really have to get this right this very time.
If I do go back just to ask her out (after she has refused), I'd obviously come off as a creep/stalker/psycho etc.
But then again, if I don't ask her out at all, I have zero chance. If I ask her out, she refuses, I've no other chance. So, I really have to get this right this very time.
If I do go back just to ask her out (after she has refused), I'd obviously come off as a creep/stalker/psycho etc.
Dude just grow some balls and ask her out already!
But believe me, it's not all lost if you chicken out the last time you will have a chance to see her (with an excuse of paperwork).
You can go back, especially because you do not have anything else to do there except to ask her out! Go there, and tell her that you left the last time and could not resist the thought of going back to see her and ask her to go out for drinks with you since you always found her very charming. Smile a lot and show her you're interested but in a light, fun way just make sure you come out as honest as you can... (without appearing as despearate as you really are) don't put up a suave, womanizer act because it will backfire especially since you're the shy type.
The trick is to be yourself, as corny as it sounds. Be the best version of yourself, happy, secure, motivated, positive and very upfront about what you want in life: her company!
You can ask her if you'd be lucky enough to meet her outside of her work, that it's something you've had on your mind for a while and that you can't just walk away.
Good luck!
Also, consider time of day. It is possible that you go late morning and that you will be there at the right time for her to say yes to going out for a coffee or lunch because she has a break coming up.
ROFLMAO!!
yeah, yeah, I will ask her out tomorrow.And FortunateOne: yes, that's the plan. I am going to go close to lunch time or closing-time, to maximize my chances.
Totally agree, that's what i did when i tried to ask my physio's receptionist out. I made an appointment for the end of that day. Got shot-down in flames cause she had a bf but, this girl was worth a try. I did have an advantage over your situation cause i got to know this girl before hand over several sessions with my physio. The odd thing was my physio was even going help me out and ask her for me.
Good Luck! what ever happens; you are going to feel good either way cause your never going to wonder or maybe or .....etc.
I'm starting to think with all this drama that magicmystery is really sevenofnine in disguise, but then I realize that he knows how to write a coherent post...
i suggest visiting one of the ladies for a session right before going up to the office and asking the girl out. this way, you approach her without all the nervous sexual angst but with all the post coital glow.
it would be more like a gal-to-gal chat. how can she refuse?
What do you bet that
1. he asks her
2. she says yes
3. they get married
4. she turns into a ball breaking bitch
5. he posts asking us what to do about THAT.........
1. he asks her
2. she says yes
3. they get married
4. she turns into a ball
breaking bitch5. he posts asking us what to do about THAT.........
Ok. Guys. I didn't ask her out. I went there when they were about to close (just 5 mins before that), I kept waiting for an opportunity but her boss was standing there and talking to her on and off and sorting/collating papers. Meanwhile, she finished doing what she was doing for me and her manager said 'sorry, I closed the door, I'll let you out' and then she let me out.What do you bet that
1. he asks her
2. she says yes
3. they get married
4. she turns into a ball
5. he posts asking us what to do about THAT.........
Silver lining is that I was suppose to give her a void-cheque. But I didn't (even though I had it in my jacket pocket). I figured I wasn't going to get a chance, so I decided to hold-on to the cheque so that I could go back once more!
I am now thinking, I'd call her close to her lunch time, ask her for lunch over the phone. I am gonna have to go to her office once again anyway, so if she says 'no' over the phone, I could ask her again face to face. Only this time, she'll have some context and I won't have to wait for her to be alone as such.
I let myself down. This is just a pathetic excuse. Somebody like James Bond would have taken them both -- the girl and the boss -- out.
I hate to say it, but you blew your chance. Sure, you'll be able to see her again to give her the void cheque, but if you ask her out when you see her again, she'll probably think: "hey, he conveniently forgot to give this to me so he could see me again to ask me out... how creepy."
Now, I'm not saying that you shouldn't ask her out anyway, because there's always a chance that she might think: "hey, he conveniently forgot to give this to me so he could see me again to ask me out... how sweet." The odds are against it, but you've got absolutely nothing to lose by trying, so give it a shot.
My advice to you is to not build it up as some big thing. Convince yourself that you don't care if she shoots you down. That way, there'll be no reason for you to be nervous at all when you ask her. If you're not nervous, you'll be more able to just be yourself - the confident version of yourself.
If you get rejected, not only is it no big deal, but it'll actually be good for you. You'll see that being shot down by one woman isn't the end of the world, and seeing that it's not so bad, you'll be more comfortable with asking out the next girl. The more comfortable and confident you are, the better your chances.
Now, I'm not saying that you shouldn't ask her out anyway, because there's always a chance that she might think: "hey, he conveniently forgot to give this to me so he could see me again to ask me out... how sweet." The odds are against it, but you've got absolutely nothing to lose by trying, so give it a shot.
My advice to you is to not build it up as some big thing. Convince yourself that you don't care if she shoots you down. That way, there'll be no reason for you to be nervous at all when you ask her. If you're not nervous, you'll be more able to just be yourself - the confident version of yourself.
If you get rejected, not only is it no big deal, but it'll actually be good for you. You'll see that being shot down by one woman isn't the end of the world, and seeing that it's not so bad, you'll be more comfortable with asking out the next girl. The more comfortable and confident you are, the better your chances.
Actually, I offered my credit-card in lieu of void-cheque. She never told me she'd need a void-cheque. I already knew she won't accept a credit card (from reading their website and stuff). So, maybe she won't think I conveniently forgot. She thinks (well, she said) she should have informed me earlier and she expressed regret that her 'negligence' was costing me another trip.
You guys don't think it's a good idea to call and ask for a lunch-date though? I should go and ask her in-person when I give her void-cheque?
Ah well, that changes things. My advice to you is no different than it was before, but your chances are probably higher than I had assessed. Good luck!
