Asian Fever

Cautionary tale

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JimDandy

Well-known member
May 17, 2004
3,082
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Lower Mainland, B.C.
Apologize for asking for a discounted rate. And then don't expect a discounted rate.
I'm sorry Elsi, I'm not entirely clear what you are saying here. Are you asking me to apologize for asking for a discounted rate at the very beginning of our interactions? Back in July of 2018?

If that is what you are asking, then yes, I apologize. To be very honest, I had totally forgotten that I had asked for a discounted rate at the very beginning of that interaction. I was going totally by memory, which is obviously not that great, when I approached you again recently. I went back and looked at my texts today and I see that I did ask for the discounted rate in my most grovelling voice, but I guess that carried little weight with you lol. So yes, I apologize for asking for a discounted rate back in July of 2018.

Hopefully we can play nice, at least on this board, going forward.

JD
 

KinkyKatey

Member
Apr 21, 2017
649
29
18
Vancouver
Hi :) Can everyone please try to remember that we (humans and really any living creature with a brain) are individuals? There is a lot of broad brush strokes going on here.

I greatly appreciate a perb handle for screening, it also gives me insider information on your likes and pet peeves that people forget to bring up on their own, which helps me better please YOU. I will NEVER decline seeing someone based on a post unless it is real malicious attack on someone, not even if I find out you are a cat person! I have had a lot of messsages about my perb ads from gents that say they don’t have a handle, these men have all been no shows, to the point I was going to message mods about the possibility of ads being seen by members only.... perhaps they were members after all.

I love perb, I love reading all the posts and interacting with everyone :) I like the pen pals I may never meet, the advise from gents that have yet to meet me. I am not here because I feel I have to be but because in my experience so far it is the best forum to be apart of.

Xo
Katey
 

Sub-Slut

Member
Dec 26, 2017
108
24
18
Vancouver Island
It was good! Had a meeting with an advertising site out of Australia about the current standing here, had a booking, took a beautiful lady to dinner. What have you done today?
Why he got smacked around by a bunch of s/ws, and not in the fun "please hit me harder Daddy" way.

Curious, does he raise (lower) his standing amongst other incels failing this hard? Must be a rough day when he can't troll a site of this high caliber.
 

steverino

Well-known member
Feb 15, 2004
1,598
1,108
113
As this thread unfolds, I am becoming more certain that it is unwise to tell a potential "date" that you are a perb member.
 

appleomac

Active member
Aug 9, 2010
707
189
43
I'm sorry Elsi, I'm not entirely clear what you are saying here. Are you asking me to apologize for asking for a discounted rate at the very beginning of our interactions? Back in July of 2018?

If that is what you are asking, then yes, I apologize. To be very honest, I had totally forgotten that I had asked for a discounted rate at the very beginning of that interaction. I was going totally by memory, which is obviously not that great, when I approached you again recently. I went back and looked at my texts today and I see that I did ask for the discounted rate in my most grovelling voice, but I guess that carried little weight with you lol. So yes, I apologize for asking for a discounted rate back in July of 2018.

Hopefully we can play nice, at least on this board, going forward.

JD
So based on your recollection; is the cautionary tale about handles, or perhaps is the cautionary tale not to negotiate prices? After this thread, I suspect you won't be providing your handle even if asked. Cautionary tales abound in this thread!
 

JimDandy

Well-known member
May 17, 2004
3,082
656
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Lower Mainland, B.C.
So based on your recollection; is the cautionary tale about handles, or perhaps is the cautionary tale not trying to negotiate prices? After this thread, I suspect you won't be providing your handle even if asked. Cautionary tales abound in this thread!
I normally never try to negotiate prices. The only exception would possibly when setting up a long term agreement that might last years. Not to make an excuse, the only reason I did so back in July is because Elsi had just recently raised her rates and I had hoped to she her for an hour at the old rate. Because of my financial situation, I normally see SPs for their $200 or less 30 min rate. But Elsi seemed to be a very interesting lady (based on her ads and posts on Perb), so even though knowing my own physical limitations, I thought I would like to have the other 30 minutes for conversation with this interesting lady. My mistake for trying to negotiate, for which I have already apologized to Elsi a few posts above.

And yes, as stated by myself several times through this thread, I will not be supplying my handle, even if asked. Not that much to gain and a lot to lose it seems.

JD
 

appleomac

Active member
Aug 9, 2010
707
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I normally never try to negotiate prices. The only exception would possibly when setting up a long term agreement that might last years. Not to make an excuse, the only reason I did so back in July is because Elsi had just recently raised her rates and I had hoped to she her for an hour at the old rate. Because of my financial situation, I normally see SPs for their $200 or less 30 min rate. But Elsi seemed to be a very interesting lady (based on her ads and posts on Perb), so even though knowing my own physical limitations, I thought I would like to have the other 30 minutes for conversation with this interesting lady. My mistake for trying to negotiate, for which I have already apologized to Elsi a few posts above.

And yes, as stated by myself several times through this thread, I will not be supplying my handle, even if asked. Not that much to gain and a lot to lose it seems.

JD
I like to think I give credit where credit is due. So the fact that you admit to asking for a disco, good on ya! I would imagine almost nobody on here would admit to that, although many probably do ask. My friendly advice, at a minimum, my opinion is that prices and restrictions are non-negotiables. Contrary to the belief of some, YMMV does not apply to everything.
 

JimDandy

Well-known member
May 17, 2004
3,082
656
113
68
Lower Mainland, B.C.
And since I have already apologized once to Elsi, I might as well go on to explain my use of the familiar term "girl" instead of Elsi back in July. I thought I was being hip and actually more friendly than using Elsi's first name. Obviously I am not as "with it" as I thought. Perhaps this is like where black guys can call each other n word and us whities can't? An other mistake I hopefully will not make again :)

JD
 

golferjohn

Well-known member
Dec 25, 2015
1,325
416
83
We have a couple of conflated issues in this thread.

1. Regarding telling an SP you’re on Perb, it’s up to you. I usually don’t because I’ve noticed some feel it’s brandishing the “implied threat” of a review ( and some have told me that makes them feel uncomfortable). But if they ask ( because it helps in screening ) then no problem. Allows them to form a view, good or bad. If that derails a booking, that’s probably a blessing in disguise

2. Trying to negotiate with someone , over use of their body, seems wrong to me. It’s not worth the extra $50 to haggle. Not buying a 2nd hand bike here.
Mr. A-Lot, once again you capture succinctly what was formulating in my scramble gray-matter...especially the slippery-slope of Review or Not Review. I guess going-in with an open mind (and not a list) will often be rewarded many times over, so perhaps some perspective could prove valuable. I always critique my interactions and place myself as close to the receivers shoes as possible...while one may have a smart/sarcastic personality, it may not translate via text/email/VM.

Elsi's posts always make me smile (and often make me think), and that's a rarity in this World, so post-on girl (tongue firmly in cheek)
 

sybian

Well-known member
Dec 23, 2014
3,559
916
113
Kamloops B.C.
Apologize for asking for a discounted rate. And then don't expect a discounted rate.
I'm sorry Elsi, I'm not entirely clear what you are saying here. Are you asking me to apologize for asking for a discounted rate at the very beginning of our interactions? Back in July of 2018?

If that is what you are asking, then yes, I apologize. To be very honest, I had totally forgotten that I had asked for a discounted rate at the very beginning of that interaction. I was going totally by memory, which is obviously not that great, when I approached you again recently. I went back and looked at my texts today and I see that I did ask for the discounted rate in my most grovelling voice, but I guess that carried little weight with you lol. So yes, I apologize for asking for a discounted rate back in July of 2018.

Hopefully we can play nice, at least on this board, going forward.

JD
.....and there is the measure of the man.
C'mon Elsi.....someone said earlier on that you two may have a good time if you got together, and I happen to agree with that statement.
He may not show up with a big silver buckle , or a pair of cowboy boots, but he apologized with hat in hand like a real man...deep down, you've gotta respect at least that.
 

felixthecat

Well-known member
Aug 28, 2011
1,575
36
48
And yes, as stated by myself several times through this thread, I will not be supplying my handle, even if asked. Not that much to gain and a lot to lose it seems.
I similarly should give you credit when it's due for apologizing to Elsi (not for admitting what was said, appleomac - that was shown in Elsi's screenshots that you missed). It's nice to see a man (or a woman) owning their actions.

But why are you keeping the idea that sharing your handle hurt you, I don't get.

I mean, it did in a sense you wouldn't shoot yourself in the foot next, had you not mentioned your handle. Should the lesson be not to buy ammo? Not quite sure.

There are whole books written on the question "what is your main weakness" during a job interview. None of them suggests answering "there are things I'm not proud of, but I won't tell you". Moreover, it's not wise to bring it up yourself when not asked, no matter how honest and open person you are. If you did, you didn't harm anybody but yourself. But isn't the reasonable lesson here not to do it again, rather than arbitrary blame your PERB handle for it?

If you read Elsi's responses again, note how she describes her thinking process in a great detail. I don't always agree with everything she says, but you cannot deny she's being consistent, reasonable, and open. I don't doubt her explanation, do you? She's telling you clearly that sharing your handle actually increased your chances of a successful booking, possibly even with a discount. It's all the other red flags that created problems. Your original post was based on a wrong assumption, it helps to adjust your conclusions when given new information.
 

MixedDude

Well-known member
Sep 17, 2012
1,463
845
113
GVRD
The convo went sideways and she elected not to see him which is completely her choice. Move along instead of creating an issue.

Personally I’ve seen none of the ladies who have posted in this threat but I admire their posts which are hilarious in a good way - probably awesome to have a beverage with :p
 

JimDandy

Well-known member
May 17, 2004
3,082
656
113
68
Lower Mainland, B.C.
I similarly should give you credit when it's due for apologizing to Elsi (not for admitting what was said, appleomac - that was shown in Elsi's screenshots that you missed). It's nice to see a man (or a woman) owning their actions.

But why are you keeping the idea that sharing your handle hurt you, I don't get.

I mean, it did in a sense you wouldn't shoot yourself in the foot next, had you not mentioned your handle. Should the lesson be not to buy ammo? Not quite sure.

There are whole books written on the question "what is your main weakness" during a job interview. None of them suggests answering "there are things I'm not proud of, but I won't tell you". Moreover, it's not wise to bring it up yourself when not asked, no matter how honest and open person you are. If you did, you didn't harm anybody but yourself. But isn't the reasonable lesson here not to do it again, rather than arbitrary blame your PERB handle for it?

If you read Elsi's responses again, note how she describes her thinking process in a great detail. I don't always agree with everything she says, but you cannot deny she's being consistent, reasonable, and open. I don't doubt her explanation, do you? She's telling you clearly that sharing your handle actually increased your chances of a successful booking, possibly even with a discount. It's all the other red flags that created problems. Your original post was based on a wrong assumption, it helps to adjust your conclusions when given new information.
I did not realize I was being interviewed. I thought I was just introducing myself. Do you see the distinction?

Enough other guys in this thread with long histories, whom I respect, have also advised against sharing your handle. Some sent me PMs suggesting the same, guys that stood by Elsi in this thread. Therefore, I will stick with that conclusion, despite any other contributing factors that may have led to the end result between Elsi and I.

JD
 

Sporting

Well-known member
Feb 7, 2010
625
439
63
Egads, I'm exhausted after stumbling upon and plowing thru 8 pages of this. Respect to all who shared, it gives us a chance to learn from each other and be better. I've got nothing to hide behind my posts here. I love all the women who "give me shelter from the storm". This is a place where we can and should leave political correctness at the door, and speak our minds without being judged. Doesn't mean there isn't going to be response. In fact everyone is responsible for speaking their truth and accepting anything that comes back as simply someone else's . I am awed by the beauty, passion and pride of the women who chimed in here. Women really listen to and never forget what we men say. (The list builds) Men would do well to keep that in mind. Every encounter is a trip into an unknown pleasure dome. It works best for me when I know exactly what I want, am prepared, and still I enter with my hands loose on the controls, ready to flow with the dance.
 

poonerboi

Well-known member
Sep 14, 2014
1,142
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If that was the comment that did it (“I said strong and outspoken. You don't want to hear women speak? Our opinions? Our experience? I'm glad you're never going to book with me.”), good. I’d eat you alive.
Really? You and I both know that there was a derogatory slag edited out of the post (which we also both know is what I was referencing). Showing even more that you are not one to be respectful. Deliberately trying to make it look like I am hating on you for no reason. Too bad they also edited the word out of my post. Keep letting those true colors shine. At least I know, thanks to this thread, that I dodged a nasty bullet!
 

ElsiDawson

Slutty slut
Nov 5, 2016
483
19
18
Vancouver, BC
And since I have already apologized once to Elsi, I might as well go on to explain my use of the familiar term "girl" instead of Elsi back in July. I thought I was being hip and actually more friendly than using Elsi's first name. Obviously I am not as "with it" as I thought. Perhaps this is like where black guys can call each other nigger and us whities can't? An other mistake I hopefully will not make again :)

JD
This thread is relevant to things and this comment is good for this thread.
 
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