Yet another porn thread

[Summer-Love]

I don't personally have a whole lot against porn (everything in moderation), but this article focuses a lot on how men experience porn, instead of being all "it's so degrading towards women oh my gosh here are some huge generalizations plus random Bible quotes that don't really have anything to do with anything". It even mentions that porn can be used as an educational tool.

So I'm just going to leave this here. Interesting read.

Summer xx

http://m.psychologytoday.com/blog/all-about-sex/201207/the-real-problem-porn-its-bad-sex

 

[MissVioletRei]

Quite Interesting, I enjoyed it.

"Porn actors give oral like parched dogs at a water bowl."

That made me giggle.

 

[cherise]

awesome article....pretty bang-on for the most part

 

[hiddencloud]

I enjoy porn for what it is and definitely don't bother trying to re-enact it with real life partners. Sex is about the total physical experience, not the over-the-top experience that you get in porn.

 

[VanessaofBC]

Quite Interesting, I enjoyed it.


That made me giggle.

Now I know why men perform Cunnilingus the way they do. The section goes on to say:

For many women, the clitoris is so sensitive that direct tonguing, no matter how gentle, feels uncomfortable. Some women prefer men to lick around it, not directly on it. You’d never know this watching porn.

 

[VanessaofBC]

Unless your partner expresses an interest or desire to watch porn, then I would never expect them to watch it with me. And reading that over again, even if I was never a SP I was unaware of my sex addiction for most of my life (until 25) so I still would have been watching porn...lol....

 

[tantalizeme]

Porn-bashing?

yes. Maybe. Sort of.

Porn is straight action. Eye candy with not much reality. A comparison ti the regulat film industry owuld be action movies like Olympus has Fallen. Based on a potentially real scenario, that gets stretched beyond credibility. Lots of visual flash & inhuman, superhero antics

It stimulates all those regions of the brain but is as fake as a politician's smile. The concept that fellas treat it as reality and try to re-enact it is as sad as the video clips of "The Star Wars Kid".

Hard to deny: overdosing on porn isn't the best pathway to a great sex life. Overall, though, in spite of its prestigious source, I find this Psychology Today article a bit lopsided.

First, the article doesn't even mention the main benefit of porn—which, to my mind, outweighs all the negatives. Porn makes masturbation vastly more pleasurable, and there can be no doubt that masturbation accounts for the overwhelming part of male sexual pleasure in this world.

Second, most sites nowadays offer a wide range of porn. "Plug-all-her-holes" gonzo porn isn't representative of most niches. Personally I prefer amateur porn, swinger porn and mild kink porn. It's fairly realistic and resembles what I like to do with SPs and civvies.

Third, why should "good sex" be measured exclusively or largely by what's most enjoyed by (fairly uptight) women? In spite of the article's claims to the contrary, I don't think porn-watching undermines most men's willingness to do foreplay. Most men who love vigorous banging also enjoy foreplay—and most erotically awakened women who crave foreplay also enjoy vigorous banging.

I'm grateful to porn for tiding me over between trysts—and saving me money by helping me space trysts out a little longer. Porn also alleviates pressure on a less frequency-minded partner.

Seems to me, the main downside of porn is not that it gives men ED with real-life women—a somewhat ridiculous claim in an age of meds.

It's that porn makes many men more easily dissatisfied with the erotic menu the average woman offers, which certainly bodes ill for the stability of monogamous relationships.

 

[VanessaofBC]

I really want to see these films. I remember watching a porn documentary that had inter-racial porn in 1923 and my mind was blown. Something from the 19th century? Sounds interesting. Anyone know where one could find such a film?

Kind of sort of related to the study:

1) I think the ultimate form of gender equality (and feminism) would be for women to stop faking their orgasms. A woman faking her orgasm isn't going to make her partner get any better and she is depriving herself of better sex. Nobody improves or gets maximum fulfillment.

2) We need more of an open sexual culture. There are lots of women who watch porn, but, many of them would rather get shot than admit to any man that they watch the stuff. Obviously there's a "stigma" towards women who watch porn and that needs to stop.

3) Adding onto #2, this is why sex ed and parents talking to their children is so important. If kids were told at an impressionable age that porn isn't real sex, you'd have a lot less incompetent males in the bedroom and a lot less 15 year old boys watching porn and taking notes to what the guy does.

If you find it bring some over, I wouldn't mind checking it out either. Purely for educational purposes.

Peoples bad attitudes are because of a reluctance to deal with the subject. I see some really old ladies, and (shame on me) I cannot help but wonder if they have ever enjoyed an orgasm. Our grandparents were taught that sex was evil, touching that area is evil. Putting a d*ck in your mouth??! Not friggen likely. And part of the reason I think is because of the look on some of my older clients face. You can tell a BJ is a really special treat for them! They look so, so thankful!!

Anyway, as we get more relaxed attitudes about sex with each generation things will slowly become more acceptable, it just takes generations. Imagine Miley's kids (or not), imagine how sexually "free" they will be!?!?! imo.

 

[Thatotherguy]

I dont know if the "all men are big" in porn is true. Most of the men in porn are 8-10 inches whereas the world average is 6 inches. But in North America I think the average is still around 7 inches. All of my previous GFs have said their past BFs have been between 7-9 inches (im about 4 inches so it never really worked out) so I think penis size in porn is not too far off from real life.

Your previous GFs either lied, or they're bad at estimating length. The average measured (as opposed to self-reported) penis length for Canada is 5.5 inches, and for the USA it's 5.1 inches. http://everyoneweb.com/worldpenissize

 

[clu]

Now I know why men perform Cunnilingus the way they do.

I was fortunate that my first girlfriend with which I was sexually active taught me what to do. She was older and more experienced. I suspect the bad lessons of porn are more likely to be an influence when neither person knows what they're doing, so I consider myself lucky.

Women I've been with since have been grateful to her for the lesson, as am I. I've got to say nothing turns me on more than seeing and feeling a woman get aroused by oral. Everything for the subtle tensing of her abdomen to the full on moaning/gasping and grabbing my head and pulling me tight. (Though sometimes being caught off guard in the vice of strong legs can be a bit scary. ) Plus women can last longer and/or cum more frequently than a man typically (it seems to me) so giving her pleasure makes it an even more fun filled evening.

 

[hornygandalf]

I really want to see these films. I remember watching a porn documentary that had inter-racial porn in 1923 and my mind was blown. Something from the 19th century? Sounds interesting. Anyone know where one could find such a film?.

I vaguely remember coming across some early porn (around 1920s) online sometime ago, but I'm not sure that much of the earlier stuff exists. The film stock used for early films was made of nitrate which both decomposes and his highly flammable (was melted down for explosives in the First World War... anyone seen Hugo? Any original film from that period that still exists is kept in cool, temperature controlled and fire-proof vaults. Much of it has decomposed into a sticky mess.

I would also note that film as we know it, projected onto a screen, did not happen until 1895, with it spreading very rapidly around the world following that (the diffusion of cinematograph was much faster than the dissemination of the iPhone some 100+ years later). Prior to that the films were played in what was called a Kinetoscope, which only one person could view at a time. The earliest film is believed to be that of a sneeze. They were very short reels.
One could also look at the Praxinscope as an earlier predecessor to the cinematograph film.

If you want to look at an example of early porn, take a look at this from 1915: http://www.xnxx.com/video489787/very_early_vintage_porn_-_1915. I'm not sure that there is much any earlier, though you could get an idea of what it would have looked like from erotic photos of the period.

Thus endeth my brief history lesson

 

[1nitestan]

The generalization - "Porn is degrading to women"....I don't really buy that. If you look at most current porn (especially the gonzo and POV stuff), it really is the guy who's reduced to simply a cock. In terms screen time, a dude's face rarely gets shown. He's just a cock pictured on camera hammering away and spitting out a load. Porn is aimed at men and I get that most straight guys don't really wanna see the majority of camera time spent on a dude.