For some girls they'll think you're a man whore w/ a dirty cock and they'll run away. For others, they can't handle the fact that you used to date a stripper/escort/supermodel etc. because they're insecure and think they'll always be compared against your ex. that's their problem.
Do I tell of having been an SP?.....
- Thread starter Lady Kay
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Another question you need to ask yourself is, how honest are you prepared to be? What if he asks you a question regarding the number of clients you saw? What if the number was 50 or 100? Would you tell him? Don't get me wrong I'm not against honesty, as I said in my previous post you need to figure what you want from him. Acceptance?
The truth is it's hard not be judgmental, we do it everyday without even realizing we are doing it.
The truth is it's hard not be judgmental, we do it everyday without even realizing we are doing it.
For me, it would be so many things. Acceptance. Yes. I would hope that telling him would result in a better understanding of myself. I would be able to freely share stories and not have to worry about letting a word slip that may give hints to what I was up to in my "crazy" 20s.
And about the whole numbers thing. Seriously. We are adults and sex professionals. We stopped counting a loooong time ago. At least I know I did.
Do you still keep count, kinky_guy?
I am not suggesting that she should keep track (I don't) - just what would her answer be if he asked. I don't think there is an easy answer to her question.
50 or 100 isn't all that high - not even for a guy. Gene Simmons of KISS says he's "done" over 2000 women. Wilt Chamberlain (Basketball) said he had "done" 20,000 women.
This is exactly the deal made before I got married. If it was a one of situation it was to be left unsaid was the agreement. If it turned out to be a relationship that she or I wanted to develop then we would be honest about it. Well it turned out when she told me, it was a one of that she just wanted to burden me with as payback for my extensive travelling on biz. In that case, I would have preferred not to know
I wonder how an SP would feel about a man she falls in love with, were to find out that not only was he her client, but he had seen not a few escorts, but hundreds and hundreds of escorts so many he'd lost count, over years and years.
Would she be understanding? I'm talking about being in love here, not just some SP doing her business and she looks at him as just another client buying sex.
Keep in mind, she is ostensibly only "selling sex" and it means "nothing" to her (this is what I was told by a few SP's). It's "not real sex" (another thing I heard). She "rarely gets off". She's "rarely attracted to her clients". The clients she sees she forgets about the next day, they're not "real people" to her. It's "just business".
But from the point of view of an SP, he's doing it to get off, for pleasure, "real sex". He may not be able to handle being with "just one girl", in a committed relationship - because after all - he has been getting sex from hundreds and hundreds of women.
I wonder, can an SP who ponders if she would be accepted by a future guy for something like marriage, truly do the same for a guy who is a client?
Would she be understanding? I'm talking about being in love here, not just some SP doing her business and she looks at him as just another client buying sex.
Keep in mind, she is ostensibly only "selling sex" and it means "nothing" to her (this is what I was told by a few SP's). It's "not real sex" (another thing I heard). She "rarely gets off". She's "rarely attracted to her clients". The clients she sees she forgets about the next day, they're not "real people" to her. It's "just business".
But from the point of view of an SP, he's doing it to get off, for pleasure, "real sex". He may not be able to handle being with "just one girl", in a committed relationship - because after all - he has been getting sex from hundreds and hundreds of women.
I wonder, can an SP who ponders if she would be accepted by a future guy for something like marriage, truly do the same for a guy who is a client?
That would be my dream!! To marry a formerly promiscuous man! I would hope that this means he is talented in the bedroom and actually knows how to perform cunnilingus !!!
edit: Hang on, is there such thing as "formerly promiscuous" when it comes to men?
+1!! Hahaha! Some of you guys have such funny views on dating/partnering with escorts (past or present)... It's ok to fuck us but not to love us... If we are safe and responsible does it really matter how many partners we've had? This type of mindset is pretty backward IMO. Especially coming from gentlemen who have wives and partake in the hobby.
I have no judgements there, just find it a tad hypocritical. But each to their own.
Does a detailed accounting of you or your partner's previous sex life really come up? And if he didn't give a detailed account of his previous experience, why would you have?
What someone did in the past should have no bearing on the present, unless they are still doing it.
It is definitely not something to discuss when starting a relationship, and after it has started presumably you will be into each other enough not to care what each other's previous sex life was. It should not matter, and if it matters, he isn't the guy for you anyway because it means that for him you are just an object, not a person.
What someone did in the past should have no bearing on the present, unless they are still doing it.
It is definitely not something to discuss when starting a relationship, and after it has started presumably you will be into each other enough not to care what each other's previous sex life was. It should not matter, and if it matters, he isn't the guy for you anyway because it means that for him you are just an object, not a person.
so true.....an old roommate of mine was a stripper and started dating one of her "fans" . as soon as he decided the relationship was " serious ", he demanded that she stop dancing cause he didn't want to be with someone who would work at such a sleazy job ! WTF....you want mrs . cleaver then DATE mrs cleaver!
I find that everyone is hypocritical to some degree. Many people are able to see this in themselves and try to act accordingly, with varying degrees of success. The real assholes are those that are blind to their own hypocrisy.
There's nothing hypocritical about it, I'd assume that would be obvious to anyone in this industry. Wanting someone for sex is completely different than wanting someone for a relationship. Is anyone here pretending to be surprised by that?
I want to do every halfway hot girl I see, sometimes the crazier they are the more I want but that certainly don't mean I want a relationship. I bet SP's don't want a relationship with most of their clients, yeah its the same thing.
Funny how a female might think that the more promiscuous a guy has been, that he would be more talented in the bedroom and better at cunnilingus.
While I suppose more experience gives a man a greater chance of being a better performer, it might ruin him from wanting to do that for the next girl. After all, he might realize that he doesn't have to work that hard because there has been yet another girl down the line who was not going to complain if he was selfish. In fact, I think the chances of that is much greater the more opportunity he's had to have sex with more women.
That's been pretty much my experience.... having bedded many, mostly paid and some unpaid, I've developed good skills. However, when it comes to g/f's, I found myself not particularly enthusiastic as I used to be to satisfying them even though I have the potential to now. Why? Because in my experience, I found that some women don't really care to be focused on and satisfied to various degrees, and those that do, it becomes a never ending obligation that gets more and more extreme once you do satisfy them in the ultimate sense. Those who get more want more, and ultimately if you don't satisfy them once they become very unhappy. So why bother when others are actually happier with less.
because of the social stigma attached to sex workers. for example ,you and i are dating and you know nothing of my escort past. we go to your best friends wedding and he happens to be an ex client of mine-AWKWARD maybe? he jokes that you didn't have to hire a date for his wedding , lots of desperate bridesmaids ! nudge nudge wink wink
you ask what he is talking about and he says your date is an escort didn't you know? best bj he ever had!
you think you would be cool with finding out like that?
Your best friend wouldn't be saying stuff like that. Your ex-best friend perhaps, right after you flattened him.
Then you go and have a conversation with his new wife about his past with escorts.
There are two things to say. Firstly, what people did in their past is irrelevant. It is only relevant if they are still doing it, and not telling you. Secondly, if the couple had a real relationship it wouldn't matter. If it did matter, then the relationship was not there to start with, and that is good information to have before you wasted any more time on him.
So, what you are saying is that you only bother to satisfy your partner if their is something to be gained for you? I bet all the girls think you are a real charmer once they figure that out
A rapist, a pedophile, a murderer, a gangbanger, a felon should not have to disclose their past if they've served their time and put it in the past?
