Things SP's Have said to me. ( with replies)

your such a wiener,
would you like mustard to go wit it,

your such a pervert,
ah but I enjoy it,

"Its too big"

"I'm sensitive over there"

"What's it going to take for you to cum?"

I never try to overstay my welcome , even if I'm still within the allotted time , so usually I just pretend that I climaxed , and go finish it off at home ..

"So you married?"
Me: not anymore
"Oh she leave you for another man?"
Me: well yes actually.. I think I'll just head home and sulk instead..

"You're funny.. I'd f*** you for free"
Me: No you wouldn't
"No, I wouldn't but I'd think about it for a minute..."

"Wrong hole!"
Me: My B.

You genuinely sound like a delightful dude, Tim McGee.

you need to give yourself more credit tim...plus looks are at the bottom of the barrell when it comes to indiscretion nowadays ..

i mean it is all part of the fantasy and you fully understand that .. and a sp texting me back after i have left the area saying "i hope to see you again, reach me even if my ad isn't up" that is sort of a little moral boost ...and even if it isn't hundred percent authentic ..i thnk the point of this whole hobby is to feel good after the experience, and if she's done that ..than i cant ask for anything more..

there are a lot of guys who take part on this because they are now a widower they lost their wife under some unforseeable circumstances ....their mind and heart might not ever want another woman ever again, but their dick isnt having it.

thats where these girls come in the good ones at least...they know they are helping people in a way , they fill an important role in society

I love you,

you just love me sucking your cock, that's all.

"You're really old."

"You're not very good looking, are you?"

"Is that as big as it gets?"

"Will it even swell up a bit?"

"I can't do this forever, you know."

"It's not a change purse, you know."

"I know, but anything with you is extra."

"I don't wanna clog my toilet. Take this and get rid of it."

"What's that smell?"

"Ow. Your toenails!"

"Sorry I just retired before I opened the door."


Why do I always get the honest ones?

Cock Throppled said:

"You're really old."

"You're not very good looking, are you?"

"Is that as big as it gets?"

"Will it even swell up a bit?"

"I can't do this forever, you know."

"It's not a change purse, you know."

"I know, but anything with you is extra."

"I don't wanna clog my toilet. Take this and get rid of it."

"What's that smell?"

"Ow. Your toenails!"

"Sorry I just retired before I opened the door."


Why do I always get the honest ones?

Click to expand...

You going to have to expand on some of these :twitch:

This is one that 'sticks out' for me:

Not complaining, but does your tongue ever get tired?

Well... I'm not really very talkative.

sometimes she will ask me what i am going to do for the rest of the day

and i follow it up with the same question ....

and then there is an awkward pause ...after i recognize what a shortsighted question that was ....

obviously she is never going to reply by saying "seeing a dozen other clients"

so usually that inquiry goes neglected , and i don't blame her,i quickly try to change the topic by asking what she likes about vancouver , since most if the sp's i see seem to be out of town

"No fucking isn't included with an hour at $360. If you want to fuck me that is $100 more."

"I promise to give you a half hour credit the next time you book me"

"You really need to let girls know you are so huge, you are only going to get a BJ from me"

One conversation for the following "You have cum already . . . haven't you? . . . let me check the condom" No I haven't - I swear I haven't - there see (five minutes later) "I want to check again - the condom might have broke" No it hasn't "OIC" "why are you leaving?" Are you kidding me? "Oh I am sorry - forgive me please" You really have got to be kidding - good bye. "Oh please don't give me a bad review"

dipsett said:

sometimes she will ask me what i am going to do for the rest of the day

and i follow it up with the same question ....

and then there is an awkward pause ...after i recognize what a shortsighted question that was ....

Click to expand...

Reminds me small talk from my favorite episode of Secret Diary of a Call Girl.

Simon: How long have you been here?
Belle: About four years.
Simon: And what do you do?
(A sigh from Simon as he realized his mistake)
Belle: I do everything.

Man in Submission said:

This is one that 'sticks out' for me:

Not complaining, but does your tongue ever get tired?

Click to expand...

That rings a bell:

"You are kissing too much." (Repeated multiple times in the hour.)
Something I never heard otherwise, not sure what to say. Luckily it was only 300/hr and not 500/hr she started charging later.

On the opposite side of the spectrum...

"Daddy, do you want to cum in my bum or on my face?" (*figure of speech, no unsafe services, I wasn't her daddy either)

Not to hijack this thread but while an SP was doing cowgirl...I told her a joke and she burst out laughing...we took a break and finished in Missionary.