(I had a request for this post from July 29, 2004)
To help increase the number of reviews I have created the following model review templates to make it easier and faster to write reviews. Just copy/paste/ and edit the appropriate text.
Review A – Good Review
After meeting ___________ the last time I was waiting for another appointment at _________ and/or reading all of the good reviews about her on PERB I had a session with _________ on _________ (morning/afternoon/evening).
Well I’m not one for needless salaciously lurid detail, but oh yes I am. As I followed _______ from the waiting room at ___________ to the (Roman/Aloha Jacuzzi/Fluffy pink bunny/dungeons and dragons) theme room staring at her perfectly sculpted ass the whole time I almost slipped on my own drool. My hostess, __________, turned on the shower for me, to the exact perfect temperature no less, and even handed me a piece of steel wool hoping to get my grubby ass extra clean. You know it’s those little extra things that ___________does that I love.
My session started with __________ taking off her clothes and revealing her (nubile school-girl/girl-next-door/centerfold/busty/voluptuous) body that oozed sensuality from every crevice and pore. At this point (Mr.Happy/Little Pink Possum/the Great Southern Cheese Factory/whatever other name you have for your dick) was standing at full attention. I opted for a nude reverse and my Amazonian goddess then proceeded to slather my back with massage oil that uncannily had the same smell as disinfecting solution. Afterwards I returned the favor by not wasting any time giving her a massage and going directly to groping her tits like a little kid with a gob of play-dough. Next I began a digital assault of her fur bunker in search of OOOOHHHhhhsama-bin-labia. I know she loved it because she told me it reminded her of when her first boyfriend in junior high would finger bang her. Then it was my turn, and she snapped on the chain mail gauntlets and proceeded to give me an HJ. After what seemed like an eternity but must have actually been mere seconds I was jizzing all over her tits.
Afterwards I laid on the massage table and enjoyed staring at ___________ frantically scrubbing every inch of her (nubile school-girl/girl-next-door/centerfold/busty/voluptuous) body in the shower.
Would I repeat? Of course, except ________ recently left the business because she allegedly has (a drug problem/emotional trauma/ran away with a rich banker). I hope she comes back soon because you know it’s the little things like the restraining order asking me to stop stalking her that really makes me like her. Note YMMV because women are not robots and depending on their mood on any given day and your smell and demeanor will provide varying levels of service.
L/A/S - 9/10/10
Review B – Bad Review
I just got back from a session with ____________. What a fucking rip-off. I did not enjoy my session because: (select all that apply):
- it was 58 minutes and 48 seconds; not the hour I paid for
- her rancid twat smelled worse than I did before she made me take a shower
- she abruptly ended our session early after I accidentally let a wet fart go in her face while she was rimming me
- I got rug burns
- she did not make eye contact with me when we were in doggie position
- she wouldn’t wear the Boy Scout costume for me
- the massage oil that uncannily smelled like disinfecting solution left a rash on my skin
- no BBBJ/CIM/Greek/DATY/DFK allowed
Needless to say I shall not repeat nor shall I again visit _________ massage parlor.
L/A/S - 7/2/1
To help increase the number of reviews I have created the following model review templates to make it easier and faster to write reviews. Just copy/paste/ and edit the appropriate text.
Review A – Good Review
After meeting ___________ the last time I was waiting for another appointment at _________ and/or reading all of the good reviews about her on PERB I had a session with _________ on _________ (morning/afternoon/evening).
Well I’m not one for needless salaciously lurid detail, but oh yes I am. As I followed _______ from the waiting room at ___________ to the (Roman/Aloha Jacuzzi/Fluffy pink bunny/dungeons and dragons) theme room staring at her perfectly sculpted ass the whole time I almost slipped on my own drool. My hostess, __________, turned on the shower for me, to the exact perfect temperature no less, and even handed me a piece of steel wool hoping to get my grubby ass extra clean. You know it’s those little extra things that ___________does that I love.
My session started with __________ taking off her clothes and revealing her (nubile school-girl/girl-next-door/centerfold/busty/voluptuous) body that oozed sensuality from every crevice and pore. At this point (Mr.Happy/Little Pink Possum/the Great Southern Cheese Factory/whatever other name you have for your dick) was standing at full attention. I opted for a nude reverse and my Amazonian goddess then proceeded to slather my back with massage oil that uncannily had the same smell as disinfecting solution. Afterwards I returned the favor by not wasting any time giving her a massage and going directly to groping her tits like a little kid with a gob of play-dough. Next I began a digital assault of her fur bunker in search of OOOOHHHhhhsama-bin-labia. I know she loved it because she told me it reminded her of when her first boyfriend in junior high would finger bang her. Then it was my turn, and she snapped on the chain mail gauntlets and proceeded to give me an HJ. After what seemed like an eternity but must have actually been mere seconds I was jizzing all over her tits.
Afterwards I laid on the massage table and enjoyed staring at ___________ frantically scrubbing every inch of her (nubile school-girl/girl-next-door/centerfold/busty/voluptuous) body in the shower.
Would I repeat? Of course, except ________ recently left the business because she allegedly has (a drug problem/emotional trauma/ran away with a rich banker). I hope she comes back soon because you know it’s the little things like the restraining order asking me to stop stalking her that really makes me like her. Note YMMV because women are not robots and depending on their mood on any given day and your smell and demeanor will provide varying levels of service.
L/A/S - 9/10/10
Review B – Bad Review
I just got back from a session with ____________. What a fucking rip-off. I did not enjoy my session because: (select all that apply):
- it was 58 minutes and 48 seconds; not the hour I paid for
- her rancid twat smelled worse than I did before she made me take a shower
- she abruptly ended our session early after I accidentally let a wet fart go in her face while she was rimming me
- I got rug burns
- she did not make eye contact with me when we were in doggie position
- she wouldn’t wear the Boy Scout costume for me
- the massage oil that uncannily smelled like disinfecting solution left a rash on my skin
- no BBBJ/CIM/Greek/DATY/DFK allowed
Needless to say I shall not repeat nor shall I again visit _________ massage parlor.
L/A/S - 7/2/1
