Small detail big turn on

[jeffu]

Often for me it's the little gestures that are the most meaningful and memorable, that add authenticity to the GFE experience and consequently which linger the strongest in my mind and keep me coming back for repeat visits.

I love getting consent for things even when I know or when it's a given that they're going to happen. Saying things like "can I kiss you", "can I taste you", "can I go inside you" and seeing a smile followed by a verbal gesture of sweet acquiescence...I find that super hot.

Reciprocity is huge for me-- when a girl runs her hands over my body as I do hers, when she kisses me here and there.

When a girl asks me for things I love doing, or gives me some direction around what she likes. Recently I had a girl ask me, almost shyly "can you lick my pussy some more?" and it almost sent me over the edge.

Further, I love any gestures that encourgae me in what I'm doing or grant "easy access". Related to another post earlier in this thread, sometimes in the buildup to my going down on a girl I'll kiss her inner thigh, and sometimes through her panties, and occasionally she'll get so worked up that she'll reach down and pull her underwear to the side, giving me immediate access. I find this super hot. Alternately, one time I asked a girl if I could taste her from behind and she arched her back and spread her ass and looked back and enjoyed the view of me enjoying her-- I find this sort of thing mind blowing.

I love to be surprised to find a girl isn't wearing panties. Like she'll be wearing a skirt or a lingerie set or something and I'll spread her legs or run my fingers up her inner thigh and find just skin or she'll suddenly move and give me a glimpse of her at a more revealing angle. Bonus points if we've been making out for a bit already and she's already wet or if she lets me dive right in and go down on her. So hot.

Eye contact & smiles, especially in missionary, or when she reaches down to hold my hands when I'm going down on her. Eye contact in general is a huge turn on as it is a tangible form of connection for those of us who seek it. Eye contact at certain opportune times can burn lasting memories into my mind and heart. Recently I was with one of my ATFs and I opted for her CIMSW option. The moment came (and so did I) and I exploded into her mouth following which she looked directly & intently into my eyes with her mouth full and a slight smile before she swallowed. It was a beautiful memory I won't soon forget.

When a girl happens to be wearing her street clothes at the beginning of a session. I saw a girl today and she had been running late on her way to the agency so instead of checking in and getting changed "up stairs" first she came right in to greet me wearing jeans and a casual (but very cute) top. Something about seeing her like that just got me super worked up and excited. Jeans are low key quite sexy imho.

 

[islander1-1]

Checking my junk as soon as I get in the door, or when I least expect it.
Texts me on my private cell telling me she needs to see me ASAP. and NOT for $$.

 

[goldeneye111]

1. When she tells me to go down on her or to kiss her.
2. When she's dressed in home clothes.

 

[rlock]

Yah! My dog had cancer, so I euphemized him. Stabbed him with my pen. Literally.

On the street, they call doing this "Doggy Stylus". 🥁

 

[freakydeaky1]

Self evident, but surprising how few SPs do this: direct eye contact.

Not sure why this is; maybe shyness, maybe intimacy, maybe not interested. Often an SP will look away, close their eyes, look elsewhere. But when someone looks you square in the eyes while deeding, it's pretty hot.

One SP told me that a handy is more intimate than bbbj because she has to look at you when she’s doing it…. Didn’t spark joy for me, but to each their own, I kinda get it.

is it common for authentic (let’s assume here its genuine) intimacy to be avoided in your experiences, or does it seem like it’s a sort of boundary they don’t want to cross with client’s and save for people they date outside work.

i have one that barely touches me until after she frenshen ups and changes (private residence outcall situation) and sexy times start, then after the cleanup very little contact and we’ll lay there and chat until it’s time for her to clean up and leave.

I might get a kiss or two but she usually pulls away before things get too heavy. I’m starting to feel like this might be my fault for expecting the intimacy / affection to be initiated by her, but have a lot of issues around coming across as over bearing, or otherwise clingy on someone who would really prefer not to. I figure if she did, she would.

worst thing about this is I’ve read reviews of her here recently - and she’s well known - and I’ve seen many comments about how great DFK was with her. This butt hurt sad sack really hopes it’s because those guys are more forward and at initiating, and it’s not something about me specifically.

I guess how intimacy is defined is different for each sp + client, and for some, they could be non-physical.

I started giving her a nice long oily sensual massage for about 30 mins before the real action, which is intimate for me the way I give them, and better yet she gets to lay down and relax and take it easy for a bit before getting to work.

maybe avoiding initiating intimacy with clients but engaging in it with their lovers is a way for you them to ensure both experiences don’t feel the same, when it’s a client vs lover etc.

needless to say I’m a regular with her…..but it’s always been that way, if memory serves.
Perhaps I should bring it up, or will it make it awkward….?

 

[angry anderson]

One SP told me that a handy is more intimate than bbbj because she has to look at you when she’s doing it…. Didn’t spark joy for me, but to each their own, I kinda get it.

is it common for authentic (let’s assume here its genuine) intimacy to be avoided in your experiences, or does it seem like it’s a sort of boundary they don’t want to cross with client’s and save for people they date outside work.

i have one that barely touches me until after she frenshen ups and changes (private residence outcall situation) and sexy times start, then after the cleanup very little contact and we’ll lay there and chat until it’s time for her to clean up and leave.

I might get a kiss or two but she usually pulls away before things get too heavy. I’m starting to feel like this might be my fault for expecting the intimacy / affection to be initiated by her, but have a lot of issues around coming across as over bearing, or otherwise clingy on someone who would really prefer not to. I figure if she did, she would.

worst thing about this is I’ve read reviews of her here recently - and she’s well known - and I’ve seen many comments about how great DFK was with her. This butt hurt sad sack really hopes it’s because those guys are more forward and at initiating, and it’s not something about me specifically.

I guess how intimacy is defined is different for each sp + client, and for some, they could be non-physical.

I started giving her a nice long oily sensual massage for about 30 mins before the real action, which is intimate for me the way I give them, and better yet she gets to lay down and relax and take it easy for a bit before getting to work.

maybe avoiding initiating intimacy with clients but engaging in it with their lovers is a way for you them to ensure both experiences don’t feel the same, when it’s a client vs lover etc.

needless to say I’m a regular with her…..but it’s always been that way, if memory serves.
Perhaps I should bring it up, or will it make it awkward….?

Sometimes they just don't like you.

 

[freakydeaky1]

Yeah

Sometimes they just don't like you.

I’ve considered that as well. That would make me sad. It’s been a couple years regularing with her and if it’s taking that long for me to pick up on then I’m way worse off than I already thought I was.

thanks for clarifying

 

[angry anderson]

Yeah


I’ve considered that as well. That would make me sad. It’s been a couple years regularing with her and if it’s taking that long for me to pick up on then I’m way worse off than I already thought I was.

thanks for clarifying

Ya. Well. I didn't know it was a thing. But it is. I was in love with one who hated me. Used to get all jealous of the reviews on her. Unlimited rimming. All kinds of stuff I never got. She finally kicked me to the curb when she couldn't tolerate me anymore. Now I can laugh. Wasn't funny at the time.

 

[VinVan]

Yeah


I’ve considered that as well. That would make me sad. It’s been a couple years regularing with her and if it’s taking that long for me to pick up on then I’m way worse off than I already thought I was.

thanks for clarifying

If you’re in the game long enough, we all get smitten by someone. It might be real, or it might be an illusion, but it happens. Discerning reality from artifice is the trick. But when your brain is doped up on oxytocin and dopamine post orgasm it’s not so easy to tell.

A skilled courtesan’s goal, like Starbucks or Lululemon, is to cultivate an experience that will entice you to buy another Frappuccino or pair of leggings. For some, it’s sleight of hand; for others, they are naturally loving and we feel it.

The beauty of these relationships is that either party can cut the chord at any time.

 

[Lippy]

Being a man of a certain vintage , my weak spot is a nicely trimmed bush, especially peaking through a nice pair
gossamer panties. Even better when being revealed because of a hiked up skirt or dress. Instant turn on. Make me squirm just
thinking about it. Unfortunately, a trimmed bush is a rare sight these days.

 

[freakydeaky1]

Ya. Well. I didn't know it was a thing. But it is. I was in love with one who hated me. Used to get all jealous of the reviews on her. Unlimited rimming. All kinds of stuff I never got. She finally kicked me to the curb when she couldn't tolerate me anymore. Now I can laugh. Wasn't funny at the time.

Hey man,

I’m really sorry that happened to you. It can only imagine how awful it must have felt at the time.

Our brains + intellect can reflect about what “the real situation” is and what the expectations should be 6 ways to Sunday, but how your gut and your heart feel in your body can be in direct contradiction to any rationalizations we make, and because of our conditioning it’s very difficult to override that somatic response you have, both when you are together, but even moreso when you are not…..

either way, happy to hear you bounced back unscathed and learned something from what must have been a tough time for you.

thanks for sharing….

 

[white Ninja 74]

One SP told me that a handy is more intimate than bbbj because she has to look at you when she’s doing it…. Didn’t spark joy for me, but to each their own, I kinda get it.

is it common for authentic (let’s assume here its genuine) intimacy to be avoided in your experiences, or does it seem like it’s a sort of boundary they don’t want to cross with client’s and save for people they date outside work.

i have one that barely touches me until after she frenshen ups and changes (private residence outcall situation) and sexy times start, then after the cleanup very little contact and we’ll lay there and chat until it’s time for her to clean up and leave.

I might get a kiss or two but she usually pulls away before things get too heavy. I’m starting to feel like this might be my fault for expecting the intimacy / affection to be initiated by her, but have a lot of issues around coming across as over bearing, or otherwise clingy on someone who would really prefer not to. I figure if she did, she would.

worst thing about this is I’ve read reviews of her here recently - and she’s well known - and I’ve seen many comments about how great DFK was with her. This butt hurt sad sack really hopes it’s because those guys are more forward and at initiating, and it’s not something about me specifically.

I guess how intimacy is defined is different for each sp + client, and for some, they could be non-physical.

I started giving her a nice long oily sensual massage for about 30 mins before the real action, which is intimate for me the way I give them, and better yet she gets to lay down and relax and take it easy for a bit before getting to work.

maybe avoiding initiating intimacy with clients but engaging in it with their lovers is a way for you them to ensure both experiences don’t feel the same, when it’s a client vs lover etc.

needless to say I’m a regular with her…..but it’s always been that way, if memory serves.
Perhaps I should bring it up, or will it make it awkward….?

Knowing you’re starting to like a provider more than you should….

Happened to me only once ! And was confusing as fuck !

It wasn’t like anything I had experienced in normal dating situations , cause there was no way to know if it was real or not , or a bit of both . But it was a head fuck.

At first I chose to ignore all of the feels cause I didn’t wanna ruin the dynamic I had w that provider , seeing as I enjoyed seeing her as much as I did .

Eventuality though , as things just kept getting better and better every time I saw her,
I decided to cut the chord !

As it was the best thing for me ,
and definitely easier for her as well , than dealing w another client who’d confused passion
( or even just being great at the acting part of her job )
for more ! ….

At least this way I left w my dignity and didn’t tarnish the good memories I had from knowing her …

 

[freakydeaky1]

Knowing you’re starting to like a provider more than you should….

Happened to me only once ! And was confusing as fuck !

It wasn’t like anything I had experienced in normal dating situations , cause there was no way to know if it was real or not , or a bit of both . But it was a head fuck.

At first I chose to ignore all of the feels cause I didn’t wanna ruin the dynamic I had w that provider , seeing as I enjoyed seeing her as much as I did .

Eventuality though , as things just kept getting better and better every time I saw her,
I decided to cut the chord !

As it was the best thing for me ,
and definitely easier for her as well , than dealing w another client who’d confused passion
( or even just being great at the acting part of her job )
for more ! ….

At least this way I left w my dignity and didn’t tarnish the good memories I had from knowing her …

I don’t know if I can’t just ghost without explaining myself. This lady has helped me through what likely would have been a very dark and dangerous time for me, by giving me something to look forward to every month, the anticipation and reminiscing in between dates likely kept me from losing my grip.

Unfortunately for me, and from what I hear, many others, making new bromantic friendships are tough when your 51, immigrated to Van 6 months before Covid lockdowns, now working from home probably permanently, mostly estranged from your family, don’t really like drinking or into hanging at bars/clubs (anymore), all in a city notorious for being difficult to meet people in. Don’t even get me started on dating and meeting women in the wild. I also am very averse to social media so don’t have that to use as an outlet for some pseudo-connection thru validation of my carefully curated bragging about my awesome but actually very isolated and lonesome existence.

apart from psilocybin microdosing, meeting her and growing our paid “friendship” and perceived “closeness” over the past 2 years has been the single best thing in my life, as sad as that is to admit. But shits hard for me sometimes, and that’s the bottom line.

hanging with her every month made it a lot less hard, whether it was genuine or not. And I don’t know if can cut the chord without at least a bittersweet (for me only I’m sure) heartfelt honest conversation to tell her how much I’ve appreciated our time together and how much she’s helped me, opened me up a bit, helped me be more comfortable having conversations with new people, practicing my charm and wit, let alone all the new skills I’ve developed in the bedroom, whether she was faking it all or not.

She’s frequently bent over backwards to accommodate me (yeah I know, I’m not special, she likely does the same for others) on numerous occasions and it’s always been easy spending with her, and maybe it’s the same ole BS she gets all the time from other emotionally attached clients, but I’m not sure I’d be ok with not letting her know how she’s changed me and my general outlook on life. I need to close the chapter for my own sake, and a truly good provider will show up to hear that from me, whether it goes in one ear and out the other and she makes fun of me with her other provider friends or lovers is her prerogative, that has no effect on me and can’t hurt me if I don’t let it.

Being someone who’s suffered some nasty betrayals in past relationships and a bit of a romantic, I can choose to wonder what’s true and what’s not and where there are lies and deception, but I prefer to believe everything I get from her is true for her and anything that isn’t is done out of respect for my feelings to not make me feel shitty, or for her own safety.

For me personally, it’s better (but not necessary easier) to trust her words and action and be present and enjoy the moments we have together, rather than spin myself out in my head about what’s real and what isn’t, and that goes double for the periods in between dates, when all that stuff comes up for me, based on my past romantic experiences.

going through all that mess in my head and getting to the other side, and being able to see things for what they were and not staying stuck in old patterns of thinking about distrust and betrayal and fear of being made to feel a fool and like I got got has allowed me to open up about life in general as of this week, and created a major shift in my attitude about my future.

I’m not sure, but I don’t think I would have had this breakthrough if not for this friendship with her (which is what she prefers to call it).…. There is also some crazy full moon astrological cycles happening right now for me as well, which I feel contributed, and she was the catalyst. Sure, it could have been anyone I happened to really enjoy and attach to, but in this case, it was her….

anyone who is feeling a strong desire to make yourself feel big and strong by making me feel weak about anything i said or implied in this post, feel free to prop yourself up on the next guys share….if you wouldn’t mind, I don’t need to hear that shit.