Question for the Ladies!

[Maury Beniowski]

How do you deal with the question that often arises from pooners that are seeking a relationship with you? Obviously, pooners who are showing interest will be usually more generous, and will hang around longer, even if you have no interest in them whatsoever. I realize client loyalty can sometimes be a tricky balancing act - especially the emotional kind, but at some point if he tries to close the gap, you may be faced with the possibility that is is better to cut bait and let him down gently.

1. Do you avoid the question as best as you can?

2. Do you BS, and tell the guy you are unattached, assuring further appointments?

3. Or, do you take a chance and admit your current relationship status?

I have avoided using a poll, as the replies can be skewed.

I am only seeking ones from the Ladies, but also welcome comments from the Lads as well...

 

[rockyy]

How do you deal with the question that often arises from pooners that are seeking a relationship with you? I am only seeking ones from the Ladies, but also welcome comments from the Lads as well...

I think most of them just avoid saying anything overtly truthful or personally revealing. Hey, it's always worked for me - and I'm 49 and still unattached.

 

[Lady Companion]

Ethics first.

It is never okay to play with somebody's heart or to lead them on if you have no true intentions. And quite frankly, money is the worst possible excuse or reason to do so.

Yes, lines can, and often do get blurred in this business. And yes, it is possible for a lady to fall in love with a client and for them to forge a genuine relationship. However, any exchange of money had better stop if you are venturing into something real.

It is never okay to try and milk a gentleman by letting him believe that there could be something between the two of you, if only she had the opportunity to get to know you a bit better (via paid encounters of course).

I have lost - or I should say ended - numerous 'relationships' over the years because the gent was becomming too attached and wanting, hoping or seeking more than I was willing to openly offer. Sure, I could have abused the situation to ensure greater financial gain, but quite frankly, I like myself, and turning into a money grubbing, conniving bitch would change my opinion of myself.

If a lady likes you and want to get to know you on a more personal level, she should say so, and refuse to see you in a compensated sense.

If she has no real intentions of taking it to another level, she should be honest. Say something along the lines of
"While I value the relationship we have forged within the current circumstances, and I truly do think you are a sweet, charming, fun, intelligent (insert adjective here) man, I am not looking to take this any further than where it currently is. I do truly value you as both a client and an individual but I am not looking for a real relationship. In fact, that is not going to be an option now, or at any point in the future. I am happy to keep the arrangement as it is now, and I understand if you feel parting ways is the best option. However, I feel it is best to be upfront with the fact that there is no potential for this progressing beyond an arrangement of sorts, and ensure that you are on the same page as I. I would never want to mislead you or play with your heart, and while it may sting to hear these words, it is a much better to ensure you know where we stand from the beginning so that you don't get hurt or feel used in any way."

I've had to say that one way too many times, and sure, I could have secured numerous additional bookings and trips with these gents, but it would have been wrong ethically.

I have also gone the other route and found a phenominal parter via the biz. We had a few compensated dates, and then moved beyond that into a very real, open an honest relationship.

I also have 2 very good friends who were clients at one time and are now (and have been for several years) just friends. We talk, hang out and do things real friends do. Time is never compensated, and nothing remotly sexual is ever offered or implied. I would also never see any of then again as a client, since that would ruin the friendship.

I strongly believe that honesty is the best policy. Whether it is a 'real' relationship, or a business one. As long as everybody knows where the other stands, damage control is done, and nobody really gets hurt. That is what this is supposed to be about. Having fun. Not being malicious and using people.

 

[shedevil]

Tricky, tricky....yes!

How do you deal with the question that often arises from pooners that are seeking a relationship with you? Obviously, pooners who are showing interest will be usually more generous, and will hang around longer, even if you have no interest in them whatsoever. I realize client loyalty can sometimes be a tricky balancing act - especially the emotional kind, but at some point if he tries to close the gap, you may be faced with the possibility that is is better to cut bait and let him down gently.

1. Do you avoid the question as best as you can?

2. Do you BS, and tell the guy you are unattached, assuring further appointments?

3. Or, do you take a chance and admit your current relationship status?

I have avoided using a poll, as the replies can be skewed.

I am only seeking ones from the Ladies, but also welcome comments from the Lads as well...

1.I always avoid the question..I pretend I didn't hear it...It's a 50/50. I can tell by a call that goes "Just wanted to see how you were doing?" , "Do you want to get together?(as friends?)".

2.I have lied about an SO. It always saves the day.

3.I only disclose my status to someone who is married or otherwise. They have invested heavily in a relationship and are not seeking anything more than a good time. Then I am honest. I do not like to lie, so avoid, avoid, avoid.

I feel that you have to cut them loose as soon as you have to ask, "Is this a call?"," Are you just wanting to talk?". Had a client guilt trip me because he was disabled. If anything, it infuriated me. C-YA! RUN! Don't look back. I felt shitty, but it is a shitty thing to do to someone. Again, it is a fantasy and the reality side of it should be left alone until absoluteley necessary. Then the "SHOVE" is needed.

 

[Savage]

It is never okay to play with somebody's heart or to lead them on if you have no true intentions. And quite frankly, money is the worst possible excuse or reason to do so.

Yes, lines can, and often do get blurred in this business. And yes, it is possible for a lady to fall in love with a client and for them to forge a genuine relationship. However, any exchange of money had better stop if you are venturing into something real.

It is never okay to try and milk a gentleman by letting him believe that there could be something between the two of you, if only she had the opportunity to get to know you a bit better (via paid encounters of course).

I have lost - or I should say ended - numerous 'relationships' over the years because the gent was becomming too attached and wanting, hoping or seeking more than I was willing to openly offer. Sure, I could have abused the situation to ensure greater financial gain, but quite frankly, I like myself, and turning into a money grubbing, conniving bitch would change my opinion of myself.

If a lady likes you and want to get to know you on a more personal level, she should say so, and refuse to see you in a compensated sense.

If she has no real intentions of taking it to another level, she should be honest. Say something along the lines of
"While I value the relationship we have forged within the current circumstances, and I truly do think you are a sweet, charming, fun, intelligent (insert adjective here) man, I am not looking to take this any further than where it currently is. I do truly value you as both a client and an individual but I am not looking for a real relationship. In fact, that is not going to be an option now, or at any point in the future. I am happy to keep the arrangement as it is now, and I understand if you feel parting ways is the best option. However, I feel it is best to be upfront with the fact that there is no potential for this progressing beyond an arrangement of sorts, and ensure that you are on the same page as I. I would never want to mislead you or play with your heart, and while it may sting to hear these words, it is a much better to ensure you know where we stand from the beginning so that you don't get hurt or feel used in any way."

I've had to say that one way too many times, and sure, I could have secured numerous additional bookings and trips with these gents, but it would have been wrong ethically.

I have also gone the other route and found a phenominal parter via the biz. We had a few compensated dates, and then moved beyond that into a very real, open an honest relationship.

I also have 2 very good friends who were clients at one time and are now (and have been for several years) just friends. We talk, hang out and do things real friends do. Time is never compensated, and nothing remotly sexual is ever offered or implied. I would also never see any of then again as a client, since that would ruin the friendship.

I strongly believe that honesty is the best policy. Whether it is a 'real' relationship, or a business one. As long as everybody knows where the other stands, damage control is done, and nobody really gets hurt. That is what this is supposed to be about. Having fun. Not being malicious and using people.

I have to say that I'm impressed. Not everyone would do the same in your shoes.

 

[noneasgood]

Excellent response

It is never okay to play with somebody's heart or to lead them on if you have no true intentions. And quite frankly, money is the worst possible excuse or reason to do so.

Yes, lines can, and often do get blurred in this business. And yes, it is possible for a lady to fall in love with a client and for them to forge a genuine relationship. However, any exchange of money had better stop if you are venturing into something real.

It is never okay to try and milk a gentleman by letting him believe that there could be something between the two of you, if only she had the opportunity to get to know you a bit better (via paid encounters of course).

I have lost - or I should say ended - numerous 'relationships' over the years because the gent was becomming too attached and wanting, hoping or seeking more than I was willing to openly offer. Sure, I could have abused the situation to ensure greater financial gain, but quite frankly, I like myself, and turning into a money grubbing, conniving bitch would change my opinion of myself.

If a lady likes you and want to get to know you on a more personal level, she should say so, and refuse to see you in a compensated sense.

If she has no real intentions of taking it to another level, she should be honest. Say something along the lines of
"While I value the relationship we have forged within the current circumstances, and I truly do think you are a sweet, charming, fun, intelligent (insert adjective here) man, I am not looking to take this any further than where it currently is. I do truly value you as both a client and an individual but I am not looking for a real relationship. In fact, that is not going to be an option now, or at any point in the future. I am happy to keep the arrangement as it is now, and I understand if you feel parting ways is the best option. However, I feel it is best to be upfront with the fact that there is no potential for this progressing beyond an arrangement of sorts, and ensure that you are on the same page as I. I would never want to mislead you or play with your heart, and while it may sting to hear these words, it is a much better to ensure you know where we stand from the beginning so that you don't get hurt or feel used in any way."

I've had to say that one way too many times, and sure, I could have secured numerous additional bookings and trips with these gents, but it would have been wrong ethically.

I have also gone the other route and found a phenominal parter via the biz. We had a few compensated dates, and then moved beyond that into a very real, open an honest relationship.

I also have 2 very good friends who were clients at one time and are now (and have been for several years) just friends. We talk, hang out and do things real friends do. Time is never compensated, and nothing remotly sexual is ever offered or implied. I would also never see any of then again as a client, since that would ruin the friendship.

I strongly believe that honesty is the best policy. Whether it is a 'real' relationship, or a business one. As long as everybody knows where the other stands, damage control is done, and nobody really gets hurt. That is what this is supposed to be about. Having fun. Not being malicious and using people.

I read this reply with great interest and I found your answer to be extremely well thought out. I can even go so far as to say I have a great deal of respect for you based on this response.

 

[jakey_edwards]

Could not have put it better myself

Bravo LadyCompanion

I read this reply with great interest and I found your answer to be extremely well thought out. I can even go so far as to say I have a great deal of respect for you based on this response.

Thanks for putting the word in my mouth noneasgood.

JE

 

[Cappy1]

around and around

this business is very tricky. and since I consider everyone's feelings as if they were my own, I try not to go further than the boundary line. the boundary line is visible although very hard to identify.

It seems to me that we as "hobbying" men spend most of our time searching for that great connection or experience with a woman who rocks our world.

When we find one, we devote so much of our internal or mental efforts into trying to work through that contact and resolve the impossibility of the situation.

And then it's back to the quest. This is perhaps the nature of our addiction.

 

[shedevil]

You are the 'poon' master J....

Having had the grace of meeting the lovely SheDevil I can say that she handles this scenario extremely well.

I usually will only repeat with someone that I could be friends with. It may be my quirk, but it is part of the connection I need to make the experience worthwhile. To make sure that I never cross that line, I seldom see the same SP without first seeing 2 or 3 other ladies before the next visit. To clarify, being 'friends' does not consitute a romantic relationship, it simply means being friends. Finding that you enjoy time and conversation with the other person, with no physical, or emotional desire to make it any more than that. Of course, in this particular instance these friends come with 'benefits' for which you compensate them.

Anyway, SheDevil knows this and we have a very good understanding (I think) of where the line is, and there is NEVER any danger of crossing it. I have been a pooner for 20 years (I am not that old! I started very young..... ) and have never crossed that line - having said that, I repeat that it is very important to me to truly like and admire the person as an individual in order to repeat. I am not looking to f**k a hot chick who I could never connect with, I would rather be with someone who is attractive, and that I click with.

Noted and well, I am always impressed with how you conduct yourself. Your handle says it all. Always enjoy the company of a GENTLEMAN.

Thank you for the words my dear.... I always look forward to it. I am sure that you are aware of this...Your assumptions are correct. The understanding is there.