Financing your Hobby......

[Teabagger]

Here is a question for hobbyists with a SO that takes an active interest in the family cash flow.

In a situation where ALL income is direct deposited into a joint account and tightly budgeted by the SO accountant..... what are some creative ways to free up say $400 or so each month?

For me, the days of separate accounts, cash bonuses etc. are gone. My only method of ensuring I had sufficient funds available for donations was to create parallel tax returns..... one to show the SO, and one that gets filed. While I was a commissioned employee I was in control of my expenses and could structure taxes withheld so that I would get a sizable return. Then I would deposit an amount equal to the phony tax return while I skimmed the balance to be used for my own purposes. Devious? yes, of course. But so is engaging the services of an SP while committed to an SO. I no longer have the aforementioned luxury and every dollar earned is now visible.

....... the alternatives would be to 1) reclaim my pants and lay down the law. Set aside a $$ 'allowance' - no questions... 2) go totally honest and tell the SO that her services are inadequate and infrequent; and that I will be contracting the services of a professional to provide a bi-weekly pipe cleaning...... after all it is just sex, not love and commitment.... $400 a month for a bi-weekly servicing is cheap maintenance compared to the expense of keeping an SO in the style to which she has become accustomed.

Does anyone have a creative method(s) to finance your hobby?

 

[DDawGG]

Start taking cash out of the ATM for gas, meals out etc.

and skim - skim - skim

 

[Fotura]

Teabagger,

Give yourself and SO an allowance. Something you can account for but is considered your own money. To do with however you see fit.

It's added to the monthly budget and as long as you both understand this is your private money then there should be no worries about keeping the spending secret.

 

[hitrack]

Tell you old lady to hit the skids!!! Shut your hole or I'll shut it for ya!!! I'd say to her.

I have no SO, so I have no positive input other than you seem to have a SO thats feels like she has to be part of the "books" so don't get caught.

 

[RobBC]

2) go totally honest and tell the SO that her services are inadequate and infrequent; and that I will be contracting the services of a professional to provide a bi-weekly pipe cleaning...... after all it is just sex, not love and commitment....

Sure, do that one -- just make sure your last will and testament is in order.

RobBC

 

[luckydog71]

Teabagger - here is a couple of ideas

- Start skimming money out of your kids piggy banks. If one complains point the finger at the ones that don't.

- Staring buy things on your credit card and then sell them to your buds.

 

[muffdiver]

Teabagger, here's a couple more.

- start selling off her stuff on ebay, she probably wouldn't miss those diamond earings you gave her for christmas, how about that promise ring that she never wears anymore, the fur coat that's attracting mites in the closet.

-You could say that you had to take a pay cut at work due to downsizing. Set it up with your boss to cut you 2 separate cheques, one to bring home to show the so that your still trying to bring home the bacon and the other to poon to your hearts delight.

 

[thedesijack]

the way i do it, I have a rental house and rented it out $ 250 more than declared to SO

 

[hornydude]

I like the desijack's solution...

Or, you could grow dope on the side and really indulge!

 

[Syncmaster]

Skimping will destroy your mind and you will eventually be caught. I think Mr.Methods' suggestion is the way to go. You can even go 70/30 or whatever percentage you mutually agree to.

The underlying issue is that the SO is not keeping to the totally agreement in the first place by using "I have a headache" excuse too often. Somehow marriage gives wifes that right, over time, to become queen.

Just my $0.02 worth of painful opinion.

 

[lenny]

Does anyone have a creative method(s) to finance your hobby?

Make some extra money gambling online, either at blackjack,
sports, or something else. If you have some time & a small
bankroll it is rather easy to win & make $400 a month. And
it can be a virtually no risk thing if you know what to do. I
have done this & could teach anyone how in a few minutes,
but your homework will take longer.

One good resource is http://forum2.therx.com/

 

[nowayjose]

Pull a bank heist. The risks are high but you should make enough to finance your hobby for some time to come.

 

[ScottShaft]

How about asking your SO to join you? You get the benefit of a few three ways and more importantly, she gets to learn some of the skills she is lacking. Everyone wins!

On a slightly more serious note.....how about faking some receipts? Maybe for some unexpected car repairs. If your willing to go to all of the trouble of doctoring up a tax return for your SO, why not make up a few fake invoices for a brake job, or maybe a muffler repair. It would be very easy to make up a recepit from, say, Midas Muffler. You can even get company letter head right from their web page and insert it into a document to add that little bit of realism. Don't get cute though and make them out for "lube jobs" or "stick shift adjustments".

Or, how about some phony traffic violations. Just tell her that you got a speeding ticket. That's an instant $175 right there. Tell her it was an excessive....thats $400+.

How about a non existant client that you take for lunch once a week? Not to tough to fake a lunch receipt for 50 bucks.

How about some phony investments that just happen to tank. "Damn those tech stocks!" Hell, they don't even have to tank right away. Just the fact that you are depositing money into them is good enough. Then, just wait for the next Enron type scandal and, SURPRISE, guess where your investments went. Again, very easy to fake a statement from an invesment company.

Granted, these ideas won't stand up to a forensic audit or a divorce lawyer (or a presistent, suspicious wife for that matter), but we're only talking about 5 grand a year..........should be fairly simple to skim a little.*

Good luck!




*Author cannot be held responsible for poorly executed schemes.

 

[lenny]

Re: Re: Financing your Hobby......

Sure, do that one -- just make sure your last will and testament is in order.

RobBC

And, in case she doesn't deal the femme fatale with her purse,
first put all the joint account monies into a separate account.
That way she won't run off with it all.

 

[ScottShaft]

Just had another idea. How about taking up "golf". Just think of all of the cash you'll need to spend on clubs, green fees, lost golf balls, drinks at the 19th hole with your buddies, maybe the odd lost wager. Hell, you can maybe even fake some lessons. All of this stuff costs money......and for the most part could be untraceable cash transactions The possibilties are endless....and so is the amount of cash that you can spend on golf. Not only that, but when you indulge in your real hobby, you can say you're at the driving range. That takes care of making up excuses as to where you head off to every two weeks for an hour or two.

 

[lenny]

Just had another idea. How about taking up "golf". Just think of all of the cash you'll need to spend on clubs, green fees, lost golf balls, drinks at the 19th hole with your buddies, maybe the odd lost wager. Hell, you can maybe even fake some lessons. All of this stuff costs money......and for the most part could be untraceable cash transactions The possibilties are endless....and so is the amount of cash that you can spend on golf. Not only that, but when you indulge in your real hobby, you can say you're at the driving range. That takes care of making up excuses as to where you head off to every two weeks for an hour or two.

Add some more "lost" for those side wagers on the links
with your buddies.

 

[lenny]

....... the alternatives would be to 1) reclaim my pants and lay down the law. Set aside a $$ 'allowance' - no questions... 2) go totally honest and tell the SO that her services are inadequate and infrequent; and that I will be contracting the services of a professional to provide a bi-weekly pipe cleaning...... after all it is just sex, not love and commitment.... $400 a month for a bi-weekly servicing is cheap maintenance compared to the expense of keeping an SO in the style to which she has become accustomed.

A more subtle, reconciling, easier to take variation of
{1} or {2} might be as follows:

a]How about educating her by playing a lot of porn movies,
either at home or the theatre? Who knows, might it put her
in "the mood".

b]And when you are in the mood, follow her around the house
nude masburbating. You could be wearing your favorite
lingerie.

 

[50 Mile Radius]

the way i do it, I have a rental house and rented it out $ 250 more than declared to SO

Damn , thats a good one!

 

[Maury Beniowski]

Do like I did...

Take control of all the finances, and tell her to butt out. When she shoves one of your credit card bills in your face, and demands an explanation for the hotel and restaurant bills she was not a part of, tell her "So what are you gonna do about it?".

Get ready to reclaim your single life. It beats living three lives...

 

[Teabagger]

Right on, thanks!

ScottShaft, you are fawking brilliant! I should be all set... car repairs, traffic tickets and investments, that is golden. I think I need a new driver, some hockey equipment and fishing rod this year too.

After 2 decades, Its a little to late to roll back to the allowance and/or separate accounts. She is one of the 'need to know where every cent went' types. $400 will always be better spent on the kids or the mortgage.

Other good options seem to be: gambling online, grow dope and the rental house .

Hell, if all these pan out I may be able to quit my job and poon full time.

"stay single "....... Good one dude... several single and divorced friends lead enviable lifestyles and highly recommend bailing out. Can't say as I want out, just a taste of freedom back.
... and then there is the sizable inheritance she has coming once Gramps kicks off. A couple of decades of suffering his shit demands a payoff.
" playing a lot of porn movies, either at home or the theatre? Who knows, might it put her in "the mood"." - tried that, it's tough to find flicks that hit the spot with her, most seem to be somewhat 'degrading' in her view and the starlette is invariably a bimbo. For the most part women are not 'visual' like men. Words juice them up much better than pictures.