Dick Cheney shooting: new revelations

[Makhno]

Vice President Dick Cheney revealed today that he shot a fellow hunter while on a quail hunting trip over the weekend because he believed the man was the fugitive terror mastermind Ayman al-Zawahiri.

Mr. Cheney acknowledged that the man he sprayed with pellets on Saturday was not al-Zawahiri but rather Harry Whittington, a 78-year-old millionaire lawyer from Austin, blaming the mix-up on "faulty intelligence."

"I believed I had credible intelligence that al-Zawahiri had infiltrated my hunting party in disguise with the intent of spraying me with pellets," Mr. Cheney told reporters. "Only after I shot Harry in the face and he shouted 'Cheney, you bastard' did I realize that this intelligence was faulty."

Moments after Mr. Cheney's assault on Mr. Whittington, Mr. al-Zawahiri appeared in a new videotape broadcast on al-Jazeera to announce that he was uninjured in the vice president's attack because, in his words, "I was in Pakistan."

An aide to the vice president said he believed that the American people would believe Mr. Cheney's version of events, but added, "If he was going to shoot any of his cronies right now it's a shame it wasn't Jack Abramoff."

At the White House, President George W. Bush defended his vice president's shooting of a fellow hunter, saying that the attack sent "a strong message to terrorists everywhere."

"The message is, if Dick Cheney is willing to shoot an innocent American citizen at point-blank range, imagine what he'll do to you," Mr. Bush said.

 

[dirtydan]

Fucking hilarious!



I just found this:

http://www.cbc.ca/story/world/national/2006/02/14/whittington-heart060114.html

 

[JustAGuy]

The whole thing is such a perfect metaphor for the Bush administration: shoot first and ask questions later. The latest I've seen is that they are trying to blame the guy who got shot for not announcing himself. Heaven forbid the shooter should actually make sure there isn't anything other than quail in blasting range before he starts firing.

 

[Randy Whorewald]

That's sooo funny!!

 

[rickoshadows]

The Three Stooges are alive and well!

 

[Big Trapper]

Spraying someone sounds a lot more innocuous.

Yep, I've done a bit of that spraying myself! LOL

 

[The Bostonian]

Thank God those were only beebees

I've gone duck hunting with my dad, my uncle and my pet Lab, we always played it safe. Unfortunately my friend's dad shot his toes off with a 22 caliber shotgun- lost all his toes. I still don't understand how you could shoot someone from that level and from that range unless you're so careless. What was Dick Cheney thinking?

 

[tao]

 

[Big Trapper]

Unfortunately my friend's dad shot his toes off with a 22 caliber shotgun...

Now admittedly I don't know everything about firearms, but what is, "a 22 caliber shotgun"? (sic).

Kev? Vman? Anybody?

 

[georgebushmoron]

Apparently the poor shooting victim got a cardiac arrest in hospital and died. I'll bet Cheney feels pretty bad about that. What a loser.

 

[OldieButGoodie]

Any bets on him being charged with criminal negligence or manslaughter?
Didn't think so.

Especially since the guy ain't dead yet!!

Georgebushmoron must be getting his intelligence from the same place his namesake does

 

[Makhno]

Join this most exclusive club now!

As an extra added incentive, all new members who sign up this week will receive this free bonus!

 

[Makhno]

So what's the big deal if Cheney shoots someone?

(video link)

 

[schizo_man]

Now admittedly I don't know everything about firearms, but what is, "a 22 caliber shotgun"? (sic).

Kev? Vman? Anybody?

Ya I don't know what it is either, never heard of it before. The lowest guage of shotgun I'm aware of is a 410. a 22 calibre shotgun would be totally useless

Most shotguns are rated by guage, not caliber, to my knowledge anyhow

 

[gravitas]

Most shotguns are rated by guage, not caliber, to my knowledge anyhow

410 is the lowest guage (although 410 is a calibre....used to know why it was different but for the life of me can't remember)....the gun Cheney used was a 28 guage and is just smaller then a 410 shell.

G

 

[badwolfcgy]

They do make bird shot shell for 22's but they are slightly better than a slingshot at 20 yards.
The 22 shotgun shells are good for chasing dogs out of your yard or shooting tree rats in your back yard.
No squirrels were harmed in this post.

 

[dittman]

smallest shotgun 28 gauge and that is what cheny was using and in the final analysis who cares. its just another hunting accident of many that happen every year.

 

[Makhno]

HOMELAND SECURITY DEPARTMENT UNVEILS CHENEY ALERT SYSTEM
Color-coded System Would Warn Nation of Future Attacks by Veep

Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff announced today that his department would immediately implement a “Cheney Alert” system to warn Americans if an attack by Vice President Dick Cheney is imminent.

The Department of Homeland Security has been under pressure to respond to the widespread panic and anxiety that have gripped the nation since Mr. Cheney shot and wounded a fellow quail hunter while on a hunting trip in Texas over the weekend.

Across the country, people have holed up in their homes and hoarded food and water, fearing another senseless attack by the gun-toting vice president.

“What we have learned, the hard way, is that Dick Cheney can attack without warning,” Mr. Chertoff said. “It is our hope that with this Cheney Alert system we will be able to give the American people some warning before he strikes again.”

The alert system, with five color-coded levels indicating the likelihood of another brutal pellet attack by the Vice President, was derided by some in Congress such as Sen. Joseph Biden (D-Del), who likened it to “closing the barn door after the horses have escaped.”

“The fact is, the White House already had ample warning that Dick Cheney was going to strike, and they sat on their hands and did nothing,” Mr. Biden said, referring to a Presidential Daily Brief dated February 4 with the title, “Dick Cheney Determined to Strike in US.”

Elsewhere, former Education Secretary William Bennett said that he was “outraged” that an NHL gambling ring has been in operation for five years and he was never invited to participate in it.

 

[luckydog71]

I think this is a good system and one that should have been implemented years ago. Why is it we need to wait until disaster strikes before using our resources effectively?

However this system still does not address the real intent of VP Dick. This whole incident was staged for political purposes. Neither the DEMS nor our ever vigilant DC press has uncovered the real plot.

This story will continue to grow through the careful manipulation by the White House and will give Dick the perfect excuse to tender his resignation.

Condie will be appointed VP in her run up to the 08 election. BTW did you see her this morning cut up Sen. Kerry at the senate hearings? She carved him up like a Sunday roast. Anyway back to the conspiracy. Condie will demonstrate her political savvy and win the nomination. Mc Cain will take on the VP role. Hilary will decide it is useless to run and Gore will win the DEMS nod.

Condie will become-
- The first woman VP
- The first African American VP
- The first woman to be president
- The first AA to be president.

And all this because the Washington press corp. got their knickers in a knot because they were not given the story first

I love conspiracies and Bush is so good at it.

 

[Makhno]

What a choice...