Carman Fox

Can a genuine connection be real if money is involved?

Previous Thread Next Thread
O

only_lurkn

New member
Jun 28, 2026
11
13
3
I’ve been seeing someone for just over 2 years now, and while the dynamic started as a professional arrangement, there’s been real warmth, affection, and consistency. She’s remembered personal details, been playful, and shown up warmly ; but the structure is still transactional at its core.

I care about her deeply, but I sometimes wonder: if the money wasn’t there, would she still choose to spend time with me?

I’m not asking to judge her ; I’m genuinely trying to understand if the connection can exist in a container like this, or if the transaction always overshadows what’s real.

Would love to hear from others who’ve been in similar situations
Thnx
 
J

jordymegs

Member
Oct 14, 2019
27
30
13
I have similar experiences with my favorite provider.

We share details and I do feel a connection while in her company. When I request an appointment it is possible she has more enthusiasm for the session than she feels for another client on her roster.

However, I am under no illusion that there is any circumstance where we are involved without a financial component.
 
  • Like
Reactions: MikeyLikey99 and charles
B

Bang4thebuck

Well-known member
Sep 23, 2012
370
770
93
I don't believe it is possible. I see working girls and sugar babies but know exactly what the deal is, $$$. If you end up with no $, there is no reason for them to stay when other men are lined up with their wallets open. Also please get a cohabitation agreement, how she responds to that will tell you all you need to know.
 
  • Like
Reactions: KaceyLivWpg and only_lurkn
Big_Guy_Rye

Big_Guy_Rye

Pragmatic Pariah
May 7, 2018
985
874
93
Everywhere in BC
You're putting genuine and money in the same sentence, and it doesn't work.

Genuine implies that there are real feelings and honest connection as if it was a real relationship.

Money just gets by that paywall of consent... which means it was never genuine to begin with.

...sure, there are real professionals in the field who won't hide behind the fantasy of actually being your lover once the money trades hands, but it's not like she'll give you a good time anyways. I think reality is more fun knowing I'm paying for a service and there is a provider in the midst who's willing to give the service, and we both know the game and how to play our roles.
 
  • Like
Reactions: KaceyLivWpg
RedDragon64

RedDragon64

I'm here for the adventure!
Jan 23, 2022
185
365
63
thesensualman.co.uk
I've had connections with many of the providers I've seen over the years, had providers give me small gifts, go overtime in bookings, and even cook for me. I've often been impressed by how they remember details of conversations we've had months ago, and they've been impressed when I've remembered little details from the past as well. Remembering small details often means that you've had memorable moments together.

But when this topic comes up for discussion on the boards, clients often share their expectation that having an emotional connection with a provider should lead to free service or the connection is not genuine. Or that maintaining a professional relationship with a provider means that the relationship is purely transactional and the provider is faking the connection as part of her service.

But take a step back (away from sex work), and consider how it is possible to have a connection with anyone providing a professional service. I've had some great chats with the lady at my local bakery, and she often points me to store discounts (and sometimes rings in discounts for me). But I wouldn't expect her to give me my baked goods for free just because we have a "special relationship". Obviously sex work doesn't compare to other service industries because of the intimacy involved in having sex, so I'd feel a much stronger connection to my provider than to the lady at the bakery.

But I recognize that having a good connection with a provider while also maintaining a professional relationship is what keeps the arrangement balanced for both parties. I say balanced because either party can push boundaries and damage the relationship. A client can become clingy, or demanding, by expecting special treatment. A provider can become lax by putting in less effort, or demand gifts and other special treatment.
 
  • Like
Reactions: MikeyLikey99, Bridge, jgg and 3 others
B

Bang4thebuck

Well-known member
Sep 23, 2012
370
770
93
RedDragon64 said:
I've had connections with many of the providers I've seen over the years, had providers give me small gifts, go overtime in bookings, and even cook for me. I've often been impressed by how they remember details of conversations we've had months ago, and they've been impressed when I've remembered little details from the past as well. Remembering small details often means that you've had memorable moments together.

But when this topic comes up for discussion on the boards, clients often share their expectation that having an emotional connection with a provider should lead to free service or the connection is not genuine. Or that maintaining a professional relationship with a provider means that the relationship is purely transactional and the provider is faking the connection as part of her service.

But take a step back (away from sex work), and consider how it is possible to have a connection with anyone providing a professional service. I've had some great chats with the lady at my local bakery, and she often points me to store discounts (and sometimes rings in discounts for me). But I wouldn't expect her to give me my baked goods for free just because we have a "special relationship". Obviously sex work doesn't compare to other service industries because of the intimacy involved in having sex, so I'd feel a much stronger connection to my provider than to the lady at the bakery.

But I recognize that having a good connection with a provider while also maintaining a professional relationship is what keeps the arrangement balanced for both parties. I say balanced because either party can push boundaries and damage the relationship. A client can become clingy, or demanding, by expecting special treatment. A provider can become lax by putting in less effort, or demand gifts and other special treatment.
Click to expand...
I have several great customers I have a good relationship with. They make me money and keep my business thriving. I call them, hang out with them, remember details about their personal lives, and treat them well, because I appreciate them. That's just good business.

There's a big difference between that and them thinking im genuinely in love with them and would continue to maintain that relationship even if the business dealings were to end.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Pumped, masonjar and hoze
Fiona

Fiona

💥Squirty Dirty & Busty Amazon lover 🩷
Supporting Member
Jan 27, 2018
737
1,877
93
Gorgeous love nest in Qualicum Beach
www.msfiona.com
Very possible , I’ve fallen in love many times over almost 20 years in this biz . 🥰
sex is passionate , add tons of pillow talk revealing who you are to each other , it happens. “Most” of the time it does end but NOT necessarily because “she’s silver tongued “ or a “gold digger “ like men here have said .
She let you in to see a real piece of her but is she financially able to drop everything & only love you ? probably not , will you be able to handle the roller coaster of feelings that it takes to truly love a sex worker ? Are you prepared to financially help her transition to a different career if she wants ?
it takes a very strong man who truly understands the business & what goes on in her real world for it to last .
 
  • Like
Reactions: Rackattack, Pumped, only_lurkn and 4 others
80watts

80watts

Well-known member
May 20, 2004
3,588
1,375
113
Victoria
Every transaction in life involves money... Money is a indication of your worth to society... Money was the answer to how much a farmer's work compared to a an carpenter to an artist to an noble. But money took over everything...
 
  • Like
Reactions: Pumped and Bang4thebuck
R

Rusty razor

Wrinkled member
Aug 9, 2018
402
694
93
Fiona said:
Very possible , I’ve fallen in love many times over almost 20 years in this biz . 🥰
sex is passionate , add tons of pillow talk revealing who you are to each other , it happens. “Most” of the time it does end but NOT necessarily because “she’s silver tongued “ or a “gold digger “ like men here have said .
She let you in to see a real piece of her but is she financially able to drop everything & only love you ? probably not , will you be able to handle the roller coaster of feelings that it takes to truly love a sex worker ? Are you prepared to financially help her transition to a different career if she wants ?
it takes a very strong man who truly understands the business & what goes on in her real world for it to last .
Click to expand...
It never ceases to amaze me the incites, variety and depths of conversations of the various threads on this site. The variety of opinions and life experiences is extremely amazing. I have had numerous relationships with providers to various degrees and can say that they can be very rewarding as long as you the two people involved understand the boundaries.
 
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: Pumped, MikeyLikey99, only_lurkn and 2 others
D

Dexter007

Member
Oct 17, 2021
69
74
18
Very much possible. I in fact dated an escort for quite some time. She became exclusive for me and I took care of the financial part, but not in a transactional way. While it didn’t lasted too long, I had very good time with her and still miss her sometimes. It’s one of the reason I try not to repeat cause this might create a situation where I fell for her. Don’t want to take the risk anymore 🙂
 
  • Like
Reactions: charles, only_lurkn and Fiona
You must log in or register to reply here.
Previous Thread Next Thread
Vancouver Escorts
Top Bottom