My first??? Damn, is this like, one of those cognitive memory tests?
I don't remember much: her bearskin-hide outfit stank, I think her name was "Raquel" or something like that, and some argument that went "It's 10 mammoth tusks". "But you said '5' on the smoke signal" "10!" "No, '5'". "My pimp Grog take care of you" then BAM, I was out like a light for eons. It got really cold too, it was easy to get ice for my MacAllan scotch, just chiselled the cubes off the glacier at the entrance to the cave.
Last time I use saber-tooth tiger intestine for a condom; my piss burned for a million years.