Nookie left the board because he found a total babe and started something called a "relationship" with her. This will be a foreign concept to you, you Surrey-dwelling low life piece of white trash.
The only kind of woman that you can ever pick up in yer 1975 Trans Am is the kind of girl that frequents the Gold'n'Guns shop in Whalley. You know the kind I mean....the kind of girl that calls her dad Uncle Dave.
Go back to your paper route, and save up enough cash for a gallon of gas and a BBBJ from a low track junkie.
It's great to here that Mr.Nookie has found his first girlfriend at the ripe old age of 38. Impressive indeed!
As for you Mr. RasSpew, it's quite clear you suffer from depression, but who could blame ya! I guess with Mr. Nookie gone, you're the biggest piece of Hamburger Helper loving white trash on this board.
I knew you could be #1 at something...I just knew it!
Or how do you manage to stuff yer head up yer ass like that? I guess you learned to be pretty flexible by hiding in the closet while watching yer Uncle Billy Bob (who was also your father) pork your little sister while she screamed, "Stop Daddy, your crushing my smokes".
Remember to go to bed early tonight, Virgil. The newspaper strike is over, and you've got a lot of people expecting to get the morning edition on time. And if you deliver my copy late one more time, I'm gonna stuff a lit firecracker up yer hoo-hoo.