Q:why do hookers make more money than drug dealers?
A:hookers can wash their crack and sell it again!
Hee hee!!
A:hookers can wash their crack and sell it again!
Hee hee!!
Joke of the Day!
- Thread starter VanIsland Lisa
- Start date
Ha ha thanks Chucky baby! You're a lil' party hound yourself! I hear next party we're gonna tie you up an take advantage of you!
Look out big boy your in trouble!!! P.s like my joke? I'm still laughing
Look out big boy your in trouble!!! P.s like my joke? I'm still laughing
Hey paige you sexy fox! I've been here in Vic. How's Van going? When are ya gonna come an visit me?? Maybe go to the cc and have a few drinks next time you're in town?
Oh and chuck my PM bow is not full there's only 3 or 4 mess. in there. I don't know why it always says it's full grrrr. any ideas?
Oh and chuck my PM bow is not full there's only 3 or 4 mess. in there. I don't know why it always says it's full grrrr. any ideas?
Oops! There were messages from months ago.I had to go back to the begining. There should be tons of room now
Must of been a blonde moment.
Must of been a blonde moment.a little chuckle from chuckles
Subject: The Art of Showering
How to Shower Like a Woman
1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper
according to lights and darks.
2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see
husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups
4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long
loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.
5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced
with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.
8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body
wash.
10. Rinse conditioner off hair.
11. Shave armpits and legs.
12. Turn off shower.
13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots
with Tilex.
14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small
country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.
16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on
head.
17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed
areas.
AND NOW
How To Shower Like a Man
1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and
leave them in a pile.
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way,
shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
3. Look in the mirror, look at your wiener and scratch your ass.
4. Get in the shower.
5. Wash your face
6. Wash your armpits.
7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them
off.
8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they
sound in the shower.
9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding
area.
10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the
soap.
11. Shampoo your hair.
12. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
13. Pee.
14. Rinse off and get out of shower.
15. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain
was hanging out of tub the whole time.
16. Admire wiener size in mirror again.
17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
18. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass
wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo'
sound again.
19. Throw wet towel on bed.
Subject: The Art of Showering
How to Shower Like a Woman
1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper
according to lights and darks.
2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see
husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups
4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long
loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.
5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced
with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.
8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body
wash.
10. Rinse conditioner off hair.
11. Shave armpits and legs.
12. Turn off shower.
13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots
with Tilex.
14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small
country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.
16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on
head.
17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed
areas.
AND NOW
How To Shower Like a Man
1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and
leave them in a pile.
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way,
shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
3. Look in the mirror, look at your wiener and scratch your ass.
4. Get in the shower.
5. Wash your face
6. Wash your armpits.
7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them
off.
8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they
sound in the shower.
9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding
area.
10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the
soap.
11. Shampoo your hair.
12. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
13. Pee.
14. Rinse off and get out of shower.
15. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain
was hanging out of tub the whole time.
16. Admire wiener size in mirror again.
17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
18. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass
wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo'
sound again.
19. Throw wet towel on bed.
oops I guess that should have been in the pee pee thread
A nun is standing outside a cocktail lounge, peering in the window, when a man walks up to her and says " Sister, is there anything I can do to help you".
"well" says the nun, "I took holy orders at a very young age, and I have never tasted liquor, let alone been into a bar, so I am a little curious".
The fellow offers to escort her in and look after her, which she finally accepts after some protestation.
Once seated comfortably in a quiet booth, a waitress walks up to take their drink order.
Perusing the cocktail list the nun finally says " I guess I'll just have one of these here "Mar-tinnies"
The fellow says "make that two Mar-tinnies and shares a smile with the waitress over the pronunciation.
Still laughing, the waitress walks up to the barman and says "Two Mar-tinnies Steve"
The barman pulls a face and says "Mar-tinnies....is that friggin nun here AGAIN?"
"well" says the nun, "I took holy orders at a very young age, and I have never tasted liquor, let alone been into a bar, so I am a little curious".
The fellow offers to escort her in and look after her, which she finally accepts after some protestation.
Once seated comfortably in a quiet booth, a waitress walks up to take their drink order.
Perusing the cocktail list the nun finally says " I guess I'll just have one of these here "Mar-tinnies"
The fellow says "make that two Mar-tinnies and shares a smile with the waitress over the pronunciation.
Still laughing, the waitress walks up to the barman and says "Two Mar-tinnies Steve"
The barman pulls a face and says "Mar-tinnies....is that friggin nun here AGAIN?"
