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Thread: Therapy for pooning junkies?

  1. #1
    TOE/BUNGHOLE INSPECTOR
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    Therapy for pooning junkies?

    The Hamster was wondering if there is any local therapy sessions for guys addicted to pooning? Forget alcohol, forget weed, coke, heroin, crack,... the Hamster needs help to cure the most addictive item of them all: SP's!

    Please help the Hamster and many many fellow pooners kick this habit!
    Last edited by Hamster; 07-20-2003 at 03:53 AM.
    Your Friend,

    Hamster

  2. #2
    Multi-faceted Member Saffire's Avatar
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    I'm sorry, but giving you that information would be a direct conflict of interest. There is no help. You must continue to seek the companionship of SP's for the rest of your life.
    Saffire

    ps - we're better than those other "regular" women anyway!
    pps - empty your pm box

  3. #3
    intumescent member
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    Sorry Hamster, all of the cures you mention (weed & alcohol anyways, I haven't tried the rest) only make me want an SP more.

    You could always try masturbating, but you might find yourself compelled, just before the point of no return, to jump in the car and get somebody else to finish what you started.

    I'm afraid there is only one cure at the end of the road. That last Good-bye.................Yes. I'm talking about your coming out party. Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, great to be gay!

    Just kidding...

  4. #4
    Guest photographer88's Avatar
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    Sex addiction.

    I saw an episode concerning Sex Addiction on the esteemed program GERALDO once.
    It was kind of quacky but with some very pretty sex psychologists.
    After his divorce, and before he met Catherine Zeta Jones, Michael Douglas had to be treated for sex addiction.
    The medical professional may have to prescribe Hamster some pharmaceuticals for this most serious of conditions.
    Right up there with SARS, ebola, West Nile, Norwalk.
    Ask Kahuna_1 to raid his medicine cabinet for some free samples of anti-addiction pills.

  5. #5
    Just another member! rickoshadows's Avatar
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    Catharine Zeta Jones....

    Wouldn't that be a cause of sex addiction?

  6. #6
    Guest photographer88's Avatar
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    Concept of bad feeling or good feeling.

    "Catharine Zeta Jones....

    Wouldn't that be a cause of sex addiction?"

    It depends on the concept of bad feeling or good feeling.

    If Michael is banging hundred of aspiring actresses but ending up with an empty feeling - then that is bad for him. It might not be bad for us if we were in his shoes, but he was lost without his longtime wife.

    Then Michael had sex addiction treatment.
    Later he met Catherine Zeta Jones after her breakthrough role in ZORRO!

    If Michael keeps knocking up Catherine Zeta Jones and is pleased that he is not firing blanks - then that gives him a good feeling.

    Rising glamour puss Catherine Zeta Jones. Lucky guy.

  7. #7
    TOE/BUNGHOLE INSPECTOR
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    My GOD!

    The Hamster would love to dip his massive 6 incher into Catherine Zeta's perfect TOE, and give her another kid. Since Michael is such a sex freak, the Hamster will let him watch and even video tape the session. Although, Michael might get upset when the Hamster covers Zetas lovely face with his jizz while going, yeahhhhhhhh,......yyyyyeeeeaaahhhhhhh......yeeeeee eeeeeeaaaahhhhhhh,.....fuckkkkkk yeeeeeeeeeeaaaaahhhhhhh
    Your Friend,

    Hamster

  8. #8
    Guest photographer88's Avatar
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    Quickie mood swing.

    Wow at 7:41 PM, the Hamster looked a wee depressed, but by 9:33 PM, the Hamster did a 180 degree mood turn and seems to be feeling frisky again.
    Nothing like a little online therapy.
    Save the BC taxpayers and medical services plan some money.
    Good thing NookieFevered wasn't around to crash the wellness feelgood party.
    Saturday night, go do a little cruising; but don't get mugged, otherwise you'll feel depressed again.

  9. #9
    I bet you could sell it on e-bay for a substantial (sp) amount of cash.. Although then what would you have to spend it on? Certainly not your penis..
    Keep an angry inch Hamster.. just incase.

  10. #10
    Multi-faceted Member Saffire's Avatar
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    Don't go Hammy!!! Who would be left to ensure discussions on bungholes, TOE, hot lunches and warts? It just wouldn't be the same.....

    Out of curiosity, why would you want to quit? Seriously. What makes a serious pooner second guess or question his quest for good sex at a relatively low (psychological) price?

    Saffire

  11. #11
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    Pooning is not a bad thing, but the preoccupation of the mind that affects both work and personal lives (in addition to the economic impact) that needs a cure. Every minute of the day, I can't stop thinking about sex (ADIDAS). That, in itself, is a disease. I just want to be able to control when to think about and have sex is appropriate.

    CGE

  12. #12
    ...What makes a serious pooner second guess or question his quest for good sex...
    How about being tired of the game. Looking for the SP thats going to do it for you this time, or spending to much time on escort review boards looking for that uncut gem, or spending money on SPs that could go elsewere.
    I personally find the whole thing tiring. Maybe its time to settle down, and find a wife, have kids, and a picket fence. Then again i know those who have done that, and these ones poon the most. I find the whole thing confusing. Is the grass greener on the other side? What to do what to do? --- Kev

  13. #13
    I'LL KILL YA ALL!! hitrack's Avatar
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    POP QUIZ HOT SHOT.

    Your cruising the track, you've had 4 greens in your pocket all day and they smell like your ball sack now, you cruise, you see some hot blondie thats good to go.....what doooo you do.....what doooo you do!!
    <p ALIGN=CENTER>
    <IMG SRC = "http://www.members.shaw.ca/dwoo/sigs_avatars/perb%20sigs/rainbird.gif" ALT="If Your Browser Wasn't Such A Hurtin POS You Would Be Able To See My Sig">

  14. #14
    Multi-faceted Member Saffire's Avatar
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    I think you are looking for someone or something to provide the answer for you. If one thing isn't working, then the exact opposite must be the answer. If you think there's an SP out there that will quench your thirst (in only one or two vists, as well), you have lost sight of why you needed the drink in the first place. We are just women who f*** you for money (sorry to be so blunt). We do not hold the answer to your question, whatever that question is. Nor does the wife, kids or picket fence. You have to find the answer first, and believe it or not, happiness will probably follow.
    Deep thoughts by Jack Handy...
    Sorry about that moment of introspection - just came out.
    Here, I'll try and make up for it......

    What did the blondes' left leg say to her right leg?

    Nothing. They've never met.

    Saffire

  15. #15
    Unregistered Abuser
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    I will settle down...

    ......once Jill Kelly or some other big name porn star decides to marry a middle class overweight, sex aholic. until then vivella SP;s.

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