I started dabbling in my mid 30s, and would only do so abroad due to paranoia. For me it was initially somewhat out of curiosity. It had also been too long and between not being able to find anyone NSA I was interested in online, and my never ending work week, it seemed like a perfect special “excursion” while vacationing. After a few tries abroad, I took it up here and would definitely concede that it is a somewhat addictive behaviour.
My first attempt was probably the least satisfying, but they seem to just keep getting better the more I experiment and then repeat ladies I connect with. Even though round one sucked, I don’t regret it or recommend an extended delay to research and get it right if you know in your heart and mind that you want to. If I could redo my first session, however, I wouldn’t get a happy ending HJ from a non English speaker in a resort town lol. I would shortlist a few highly praised ladies in the $300-$400/h range here in town, reach out to them stating my interest and that it’s my first time, and any anxiety or insecurity issues I may have. I had some of my own when I first started in town and they were always put to rest in a comforting way.
Four inches should be more than enough to achieve penetration so you’ll be fine. I can’t imagine any highly regarded provider intentionally humiliating or shaming a client unless it was requested. I’m only guessing but I think what the lady meant was that a cock the diameter of a coke can would be too much, and not saying that the height was too short.
Good luck man!