A Review of Thailand Part 4: The 2 Things I Didn't Do (Go Go Bars/Freelancers)

jamasianman

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Dec 5, 2015
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There are 5 categories of sex from what I've read: Soapy Massages, Blow Job Bars, Massage Parlours, Go go Bars, and Freelancers. I did not take part in the last two.

My initial plan for Thailand was to try 4 of the 5, and not try freelancers. However after looking up how to do the go-go bars, its a bigger hassle than it should be. I will explain in detail. I did not go and try this myself by the way, this is just from what I have read and seen/

The go-go bars/girly bars are numerous and easy to spot. They will have giant neon signs, be full of loud music, and will have scantily dressed women inside the bar or not dancing on poles, demeaning like decoration. There is a set protocol for getting one of these women, and its complicated. The bars make their money not on the women, but the drinks. It is customary for you to go inside, order a drink or two, and then a girl will approach or you approach them. Then it becomes a sly game of building rapport and talking. Sometimes it gets confusing, as there are girls in the bar who can't leave, there are girls you can take out, and there are girls who are servers and they also cannot leave. If you think you can skip the custom of buying yourself a drink and her one, then you'll find yourself looking cheap. Sometimes the girl won't even finish her drink either, it will be taken away and given to another, because if she has to have a cocktail with every guy who buys her one she will be wasted before the night is finished.

Anyways after you buy her a drink and ask her if she wants to go with you (she will most likely say yes), you have to pay a bar fine in order to take her out. Its anywhere from 600-800 baht. Then you have to find a short time hotel to do the deed in, as well as pay the girl for short time or long time. Short time is she leaves when you finish, long time is overnight. Some places have a room upstairs you can rent as well.

That is why its such a hassle. It costs you the price of two drinks to get in the door, then you have to pay the bar, the hotel, and her for some sex. If you think you can take her back to your hotel to save some cash, you're dead wrong. The short time hotels exist for a reason. the last hotel we stayed at has a visitor policy, he or she must leave their ID at the counter and sign in, and leave at 6AM. If you break the rules, 1k baht fine. They wouldn't list this policy unless it happens often. My travel buddy says they won't enforce it because he wanted to maybe do a hookup, but I told him it would be very awkward if he tried. The hotel also has a photocopy of your passport when you book. And you can't very well bring an escort to a hostel.

All this ends up making the thing last for 2-3 hours. This versus going to a massage parlour and being out in less than an hour. Some may like the loud music and atmosphere and doesn't mind the 350 baht for the drinks and the bar fine, but then walking to the hotel and the negotiation, all of it feels very clinical to me so I never partook. Also there are safety issues. You can't very well bring back a stranger to your personal hotel room, and if she leads you to a short time hotel she could very easily take you somewhere shady and text someone to rob you after. I don't think this happens very often, but it could.

The same goes for freelancers. I wouldn't even have the slightest clue of telling them apart from a local or a tourist. These areas are bustling with locals, tourists, people working for the clubs and bars, some are just dressed up tourists looking to party, or local girls looking nice. A wrong proposition could easily mean a slap in the face to the wrong woman. Its nice to just pay for the short time hotel and the girl, and forgo to the bar fine and drinks, but finding a freelancer for me is the riskiest option because its also the cheapest. Unless you know what to look for, and have a short time hotel in mind, then do more research if you want to do these two options. It does seem to be a popular option when it comes to those looking for sex. You'll be walking down the street and see an older white guy with a dressed up hottie near him, you know where they are headed.

There you have it, my summation of doing some different kinds of sex stuff in Thailand. I have only scratched the surface. There are places where if you call ahead, you can get a guy to give you a happy ending massage if you are a woman who wants to be pleasured. Also gay men and ladyboys. And with multiple visits and experience, you could experiment with repeat visits. Such as picking TWO girls at a bj bar and having a double bng right there for 1600 baht (65 dollars). Or getting a threesome with some nice women, or picking two women at a massage parlour and getting them to be naked so you can motorboat one with happy ending after 4 hand massage. If I had known the soapy would be meh, I could have all this with the 6k and had a hj every single night in Chiang Mai and Phuket.

And don't write out the soapy massage completely. I hear Christin Massage in Phuket is awesome, and there are many places that are smaller in scale and won't cost as much. Once you get over 2k for sex however, you should expect better services, in my eyes. I dropped 250 Canadian when I easily could have paid 3k for what they consider a plainer girl and to me she could have been fine as long as the service was good. The biggest thing to take away is: Keep your legit massage and happy endings separate, and you won't be disappointed.

Also some places might not let you pick the girl. It might be the way it is. I should have been a tad more assertive at Analissa and Kasalong, just remember to have confidence and to walk away if you don't like the selection. I could have easily backed away from the plainness of Kasalong, and did Lolita's instead. Just because you go there, does not guarantee a lock in visit. Once you pay you're locked in. I tried to buy a luggage at a little shop, the guy went after me at 1400 when the most I was willing to spent was 900. I tried to haggle down but started to high so I walked. Haggling is a big thing for the happy ending tip and at markets for wares and goods, but not for food and other things. This may be a huge turn off for some, but its the way it is for rub and tugs.

PS. If you go for a legit massage, and they did a great job which they usually do, tip them personally 100 baht. Like give it them personally. They work hard and have good experience, don't give it to the front counter make sure they get it.

PM me or comment below if you have any questions about the sex stuff, or literally anything about Thailand. I want the free flow of info and to make sure people get value there and stay safe.
 
Dec 25, 2017
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I appreciate your time and effort in documenting all four parts. I found them interesting to read- thank you. I am going to Prague and Berlin at the end of the year and will endeavour to post a similar chronicle of my experiences.
 
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