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Is there such a thing as a type of girl you'd bang vs girl you'd marry?

emacky

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So I've been having this conversation with an ex SP (lets call her E) who has long since moved on from this industry. Essentially, right now there are two girls in my life. One an former SP (lets call her A)that I've seen regular for years that retired, moved back home and looking to find a husband (not for financial support). The other is a girl is a girl I've met off one of the dating websites (lets call her N).

So from my conversation with E, she asked me bluntly "How would you rate the sex with A?" I told her that the sex was amazing and we connected on a very intimate level. She told me that it's just the level of service she provides that's why the sex was the way it was. I was a bit skeptical of her answer as I've been in this hobby long enough to see the difference between great service and a genuine connection. I've seem gems that everyone's bragged about (ie Swan, Milky, Candy) and the service was great, but there wasn't a connection.

E also told me some other stuff about not dating a former SP but I won't get into it unless people want more details.

I've had two dates with N and she's quite different. She's Chinese, family oriented, similar life history like me, she's quite religious, but she doesn't have the body type of the Swan, Milky, Candy, Vivi or Sally.

Anyways, E stated that the girl you enjoy sleeping with isn't going to the same type of girl you'd want to marry. I've never understood that since I've dated girls that were marriage material but I've never could connected with on an sexual intimate level.

I'm curious from those of us that are older, do you still believe you'll find someone you'll connect with intimately and with long term marriage material?
 

clu

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Oct 3, 2010
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I'd say that sentiment is just rooted in stereotypes. If the stereotype of a wife is supposed to be subservient, then that implies less confidence. But if a woman is sexually confident and/or quite attractive, then that can mean greater confidence in general. If you can handle confidence and you're what she would consider marriage material too, then there's no reason it wouldn't work if that's what you're both looking for.
 

Relax10

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Feb 4, 2019
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In a perfect world we'd marry the hottest lady, we'd have a great connection who also is the best in bed ever! Realistically there is a give and go. You can absolutely fall in love with a lady who you'd never thought you see yourself with and might not be as good as some great SP's who'll rock your rock 1000 ways. But because you connect on another more intimate level and sometimes you cant help how you feel, you may accept that she cant deep throat your 12 inch cock the way a certain SP can.

Just because you meet a great lay dosen't mean she's marriage material or would be great wife. I met a great lay who I didnt marry but still know and she isnt the best wife but damn when I was banging her it was heaven. Her husband puts up with her crap because she's a great lay but that doesn't mean he's happy outside of the sex.

At the end of the day, sex is only a part of a what makes great relationship, marriage or not. We all accept people for their flaws because we all ain't perfect. When you get older and cant get it up or maybe not feel sex as important as other factors. Don't get me wrong there are some SP's just on skills alone I'd propose to today :biggrin1: and I have no doubt they'd make great wives but that doesn't mean we'd click as positive in a relationship the way we click in the business of an client/SP.

On the flip side a woman deals with guys they'd fuck but not marry. Talk to some civies and they'll tell you there's this hot dude they let fuck them silly but no way they'd marry him unless he's on their "I can change him" list.
 

ExpCharlee

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I can tell you right now I'd never marry a man who could satisfy me sexually. I just don't think men who are good in bed are marriage material: they're always so much drama. I'd much rather settle for a guy who could fix the sink or build me a cabinet like a good little boy. THAT is marriage material right there. Guys who are good in bed are much more likely to cheat or exhibit other unpredictable and disrespectful behaviour. They've probably slept with a lot of other women and could never be satisfied to just settle down with one person. I could never trust them. And if the sex isn't good, it's obviously their fault and has nothing to do with me, and I'll probably just hire male SPs to meet my demands behind their back, and lie to them.

BIG GRIN
 

Relax10

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I can tell you right now I'd never marry a man who could satisfy me sexually. I just don't think men who are good in bed are marriage material: they're always so much drama. I'd much rather settle for a guy who could fix the sink or build me a cabinet like a good little boy. THAT is marriage material right there. Guys who are good in bed are much more likely to cheat or exhibit other unpredictable and disrespectful behaviour. They've probably slept with a lot of other women and could never be satisfied to just settle down with one person. I could never trust them. And if the sex isn't good, it's obviously their fault and has nothing to do with me, and I'll probably just hire male SPs to meet my demands behind their back, and lie to them.

BIG GRIN
:first:....damn how do you really feel :lol:. Alright gentlemen we've just be schooled, thread over :D
 

emacky

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"E also told me some other stuff about not dating a former SP but I won't get into it unless people want more details."

Give some details buddy, need the full before answering

FYI i married in my early thirty to a woman (not SP but might as well be), by my fourth year in marriage she turning completely different. Cheated, expensive, cost me about 600k total for divorce. So the young mens today, take the notes :bounce:
E told me some of her sisters left the industry thinking they could became mama-sans but eventually continued being a p/t SP behind her husband's back because Johns wanted to see her instead of her girls and it was either do the business or risk having the business walk out the door. Another thing was that like any Asian women from Asia who were force to sell herself for money, that in the end it's all about the money and to be cautious that she doesn't want me for my money.

She also told me that unless the girl has another skill where she could work a steady career (massage, spa, seamstress, etc) she might be force to return back to the industry.

It's kinda funny because E was the first SP I'd ever consider marrying because the sex was so amazing and I felt this amazing connection. She's even hinted to me a couple times that when she first came back after retiring that if I wanted to ask her out she'd say yes. She's married now and I'm happy having a friend with a view that only someone who was part of this hobby would understand.
 

ExpCharlee

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I could marry a guy with any job except being a male escort. I just don't see it as the same, I couldn't handle it...I'm too insecure. Army or mining would be fine, because I'd rather he maybe die than sleep with someone else (even if it was because that was his job).
 

0hi

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A friend once told me that in a man's life there will be 3 women:

1. The wife - the woman who will always take care of him, love him unconditionally, and to whom he'd entrust his life savings.
2. The lover - the woman he longs to see, who he thinks about all the time, and with whom he has passionate sex with.
3. The best friend - the woman to whom he entrusts all of his secrets.

In my case, this is dead on, as I know exactly who in my life falls into each category and I'm pretty sure this applies to a lot of you as well. Can a girl fall into two of those categories? For sure! But I don't think anyone (at least in my life) can fall into all three. So, I think it's entirely possible to have a girl who is marriage material and you have unreal sexual connection with, but will you also be able to confide in her and vice versa?
 

ExpCharlee

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wow ya'll put us into boxes hey? how tidy of you. if only you were like that with the rest of your lives

*breathes*

sorry this thread is pissing me off. hahah fffffuuuk.
 

anmon8490

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Dec 12, 2018
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I can tell you right now I'd never marry a man who could satisfy me sexually. I just don't think men who are good in bed are marriage material: they're always so much drama. I'd much rather settle for a guy who could fix the sink or build me a cabinet like a good little boy. THAT is marriage material right there. Guys who are good in bed are much more likely to cheat or exhibit other unpredictable and disrespectful behaviour. They've probably slept with a lot of other women and could never be satisfied to just settle down with one person. I could never trust them. And if the sex isn't good, it's obviously their fault and has nothing to do with me, and I'll probably just hire male SPs to meet my demands behind their back, and lie to them.

BIG GRIN
May I introduce you to polyamorous? Me and my spouse are fairly open, if she wants to seek out any lover so be it because I will do the same as long there is a line of communication and consent (hottest thing ever). I know I am not a great lover *gasps* being honest, shocking I know. Our whole relationship is based on honesty communication and deep conversations. I know all my needs are not gonna be meet by her but can easily satisfied by my other gfs and SPs (we just started seeing). The question why cheat and lie? It doesn't make any sense to me. In our format we have a low number of lovers, which is surprisingly in the nature of being polyamorous. That is my two cents on this topic. To be honest best decision me and my spouse ever decided to do never been happier.
 

ExpCharlee

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May I introduce you to polyamorous? Me and my spouse are fairly open, if she wants to seek out any lover so be it because I will do the same as long there is a line of communication and consent (hottest thing ever). I know I am not a great lover *gasps* being honest, shocking I know. Our whole relationship is based on honesty communication and deep conversations. I know all my needs are not gonna be meet by her but can easily satisfied by my other gfs and SPs (we just started seeing). The question why cheat and lie? It doesn't make any sense to me. In our format we have a low number of lovers, which is surprisingly in the nature of being polyamorous. That is my two cents on this topic. To be honest best decision me and my spouse ever decided to do never been happier.
I've been poly my whole life <3 that whole comment I made is sarcasm. teehee
 

emacky

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I should add for context that prior to A's retirement, we've went for food and coffee numerous times and she regularly made food and soup for me to come over and drink.

wow ya'll put us into boxes hey? how tidy of you. if only you were like that with the rest of your lives

*breathes*

sorry this thread is pissing me off. hahah fffffuuuk.
Sorry Clementine, I'm just asking for an opinion from the forum. I wasn't really trying to put women into categories
 

DSP

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Dec 21, 2010
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People I'd marry = A
People I'd bang = B
A ⊆ B
Ideally, I'd like to have my cake and fuck it too. Wait, how do idioms work?
 

0hi

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I mean Ohi's comment about the "three kinds of girls"
I think I already covered my opinion when I talked sarcastically about the kinds of men I'd date/marry lol
Alright. Let's back it up. If you go back to OP's post his friend put women into different types (i.e. the girl you enjoy sleeping with isn't going to the same type of girl you'd want to marry). And this friend is a woman lol. If you could take her advice in context, then please take my comment in context as well.

I wasn't trying to offend anyone with my post. Of course I'm not saying every man will literally only have these 3 women in his life. All I was trying say was unfortunately, sometimes you can't have it all. And if I'm reading OP's post correctly, his friend is saying the same thing.
 

ExpCharlee

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why isn't the girl you're sleeping with going to be the one you want to marry though? why? like can we really examine this?
also do or do not, there is no try ;)

Alright. Let's back it up. If you go back to OP's post his friend put women into different types (i.e. the girl you enjoy sleeping with isn't going to the same type of girl you'd want to marry). And this friend is a woman lol. If you could take her advice in context, then please take my comment in context as well.

I wasn't trying to offend anyone with my post. Of course I'm not saying every man will literally only have these 3 women in his life. All I was trying say was unfortunately, sometimes you can't have it all. And if I'm reading OP's post correctly, his friend is saying the same thing.
 
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