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Thread: Why do some men do this?

  1. #1

    Why do some men do this?

    I received a call earlier today from a gentleman who, among other things, asked me to describe myself.

    ???

    I advertise only online, and my photos and the link to my web site are always in my ads -- even when my phone number isn't!! So .... what's with this? I asked him where he got my number, and he said "a friend" gave it to him.

    Sorry, but that sounds strange to me. Does this atually happen?

    Back in Ottawa, I used to get calls from people who'd say, "yeah, I saw your ad in the Citizen." Well, I NEVER advertised in the Citizen. So how could they have seen my ad there? Some would start to backpedal, "oh, maybe I saw it in the Sun." Nope, I only advertise online. Others would argue with me over it, insisting that my ad was in the newspaper. (Wouldn't I know where my ads are?)

    I have no idea why men would do this -- and I welcome any input! -- but when someone phones me who seems to know very little about my ad, I'm immediately suspicious. It's probably one of the quickest ways for a caller to get shut down by me.

    But still, it's mystifying. Any comments?

    ..Lyla..

  2. #2
    I guess what creeps me out is having to wonder about their motivations. Sometimes I wonder if such people aren't LE. They almost seem to have a checklist that they're going down, hitting only on certain incriminating questions, and not behaving as normal callers do.

    For example, since I've been here, I've received tons of calls from guys asking me:

    1) to visit Edmonton or Calgary -- those areas require a license, and since I don't have a license for those municipalities, I don't provide service there;

    2) to provide incall on the first session. This was something I did in Ottawa -- essentially, due to the fact that the police refused to enforce the laws consistently, it was necessary to provide incall on the first appointment to remain competitive. However, I can see no evidence that it's done by anyone else here in the area of Alberta I live in -- so why would I do it?

    3) to meet them in a public place to discuss my services -- ding! ding! ding! That's a violation of the solicitation law;

    4) to discuss "explicits" of service.

    In addition to this, the callers in question always seem to know very little about my ad or web site.

    But what's weirdest of all is that *real* customers very rarely ask any of these questions, and always seem quite familiar with my site.

    So what's with these guys?

    ..Lyla..

  3. #3
    Workin Stiff
    Join Date
    Jul 2002
    Location
    Seattle
    Posts
    16

    Lightbulb Not all men do that

    Originally posted by Lyla
    So what's with these guys?

    ..Lyla..
    They are either
    1. Stupid
    2. LE
    or
    3. They have no regard for your safety and peace of mind.

    Lyla,

    No matter where you advertise, I'd only expect people familiar with your ads to contact you. If someone is asking questions about you that are answered in your ads I would be suspicious, as they are either idiots or unfamiliar with your ad. If they are unfamiliar with your ad, why are the contacting you? Do you also sell Mary Kay cosmetics? Or Avon? When recommending a lady or asking for a recommendation, an ad or web site is always referenced when available. I try not to bother a lady with questions that can be easily answered by reading her ad or her web site (ok Jude, so I am not perfect LOL)

    I am not familiar with the laws and LE practices where you are at. Heck, I barely understand them where I am at. But if you are being asked to violate the law by people you are suspicious of, well.... enough said. It seems in my area these types of inquires go right to the deleted mail folder and are not even considered. You already know how I feel about taking risks I am not comfortable taking.

    I can't vouch for other gentlemen, but that is not how I approach someone I want to meet. When I introduce myself (almost always via email) I have a very good idea of her services, incall availability, appearance (even without photos), attitude, her likes, her dislikes, etc. When I get to the point where I want to meet a lady, I have a very good feeling that we will have good chemistry. In most cases when I know all of the above good chemistry is automatic.

    A lot of times on my quest for that knowledge, I figure out that good chemistry is unlikely (about 3 to 1), and I give up the pursuit and she never even knew I was interested. Why waste her time, until I am certain that we will 'get along'. I am pretty sure I am not the only one that plays the game this way, but it is apparent that we don't all play the same way. End result, is I have yet to TOFTT. I have been disappointed a couple of times, but I take all the blame. I took some shortcuts in my research and ended up with an 'average' experience. 90% of the time, I have received the exceptional service I assumed I would when making my initial inquiry. Does that make sense?

    Remember, as the would be client trying to get on a ladies 'client list', it is the gentlemanís responsibility to put his best foot forward. We are not always perfect, but I would concentrate your effort on those that try. If you feel the need to reply to this type of email instead of delete it, you can refer them to the following link;
    http://www.bigdoggie.net/guides/clienttips.shtml I found this and other guides extremely helpful when jumping in for the first time.
    Originally posted by Lyla
    But what's weirdest of all is that *real* customers very rarely ask any of these questions, and always seem quite familiar with my site.
    ..Lyla..
    There is nothing weird about that. *real* customers know what they want, and know that your companionship will satisfy their needs. These are the guys you need to spend your energy helping (IMHO of course).
    "Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming -- Wow -- What a Ride! ..... too bad it wasn't a SloRide!"
    -- SloRider

  4. #4
    Well, actually, that's pretty much what I figured and pretty much what I do.

    But every once in a while, I just like to ask for some feedback on things, just to see if there's anything I might have overlooked. I guess, being new to this area, I'm reaping a lot more of this type of attention than I did in recent years in Ottawa, where I was well-established.

    ..Lyla...

  5. #5
    Hi Lyla,

    I am a new user to this forum, another lady in the biz, out in BC... I was reading your post and having a bit of a chuckle, as I know what you mean by the wierd calls... I've had a few myself!

    Normally,for me, most gents just want rates, location, get a handle on your personality/services type of brief general info. (I don't have a website, just a print ad.) They know what they are after, and booking to meet each other is pleasant and easy. If they are a newbie to the hobby, they'll usually state as such (and if they don't I can usually guess and will ask) and inquire what is acceptable to discuss by phone or e-mail.

    Several times since I started though, I have had men call and say, "Hi, I saw your ad, and I was wondering if you could tell me a little more about yourself?" They don't just want "standard" info, they want to know *exactly* what I look like, what I'm wearing at that particular moment, what I do/enjoy/can they do, and blah blah blah... they don't want just general info, they want ALL the details, and the more descriptive/explicit the better...

    If you're listening really carefully, you can hear the more discreet guys breathing just a *little* bit too heavily in the background... The others are just plain obvious about it...

    At that point, if I am *positive* that's what's going on, (and if I haven't caught on long before and already put a stop to it) I'll just "fire point blank" and ask "Are you masturbating?!?!" Usually they gasp and hang up... Tactful or classy? No. Effective? Yes! Funny? Very much so!!

    Could this perhaps account for a percentage of those wierd calls?

  6. #6

    Red face why men ask...

    Nadia is probably right about the guys asking the "extra" questions, at least most of the time. Sometimes I might ask a girl to confirm details on the website, just to make sure it's not bait and switch or the pics are really her. I have experienced agencies that give descriptions that are different than what the girl advertises in the newspaper, and I have met SPs who look nothing like their photos (either totally faked or airbrushed so much you wonder there's a person left!).

    Finally, b/c of my own personal circumstances, I may ask what might be considered off the wall questions or give more information about myself than other clients would. This is because:
    1. I want to know if I can actually get to the S.P.; and
    2. I want to know that she feels comfortable with my particular disability.
    "Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment." - Will Rogers

  7. #7
    Originally posted by Nadia
    I have had men call and say, "Hi, I saw your ad, and I was wondering if you could tell me a little more about yourself?"
    I love that question! It gives me a chance to respond with one of my favourite lines, "I was born at an early age..."

    I don't get too many breathers on the phone anymore, but I think I get the e-mail equivalent from time to time. Since it's against my policy to discuss explicits, it never really goes anywhere.

    ..Lyla..

  8. #8
    Workin Stiff
    Join Date
    Jul 2002
    Location
    Seattle
    Posts
    16

    Re: why men ask...

    Originally posted by williewheeler
    Sometimes I might ask a girl to confirm details on the website
    Thatís a pretty typical informed client telephone call. It will be apparent by the questions and the tone used that you are familiar with her ad.

    Originally posted by Nadia
    I am *positive* that's what's going on
    Too freakin funny. ROTFLMAO. I guess I am naive, but I never woulda guessed that SPs are the phone sex providers for phone sex hobbyists on a budget. Who woulda thought!

    Nadia, I applaud your quick wit and application of your sense of humor. I don't know which is funnier them using an SP for this or your treatment of them. Touchť!

    Originally posted by Lyla
    I love that question! It gives me a chance to respond with one of my favourite lines, "I was born at an early age..."
    Lyla, Great line! It appears that you have the right sense of humor to handle these situations as Nadia. .
    "Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming -- Wow -- What a Ride! ..... too bad it wasn't a SloRide!"
    -- SloRider

  9. #9
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    vancouver, B.C.
    Posts
    55
    There are a lot of creepy guys who are in this hobby but there is a few that are not. When I first started out I didn't know what to say when I made the first phone call. Lot of butterflies, my dear ladies, alot of them. I didn't know the do's or don'ts, I didn't know about these boards at the time. I was so nervous, it was like I was in a time warp and I was 14 again calling a girl for the first time.
    I know I don't what to come off as a creepy bastard on first contact. I still get nervous, not as bad as when I first started out. What are some good ice breakers? What's some advice you can give the first-timers out there? What do you want to hear when a new client calls?

    Play safe and be careful of those creepy bastards out there.

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